Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Miss You Issues: The Dawn Of LDR

Collapse
X
Collapse
  •  

  • Miss You Issues: The Dawn Of LDR

    Dear Miss U,

    I recently realized I had to move away from my boyfriend of 3 months, I want to know if there's anything I need to know about starting a long distance relationship? My boyfriend knows and really wants it to work as well.

    Zelda



    Dear Zelda,

    I feel the only thing people need to know about starting a long distance relationship is that you need to treat the relationship and your partner the same, regardless of proximity. That means making time for each other, supporting each other and meeting each other’s needs. Your relationship doesn’t go on pause. You’re still responsible for maintaining it. Keeping it fun and fulfilling, and moving it forward.

    Also, attitude really is everything. You can choose to see this as positive – that you’re staying together, making it work and continuing to be an awesome couple – or you can feel sorry for yourselves and suck all the joy out of what may otherwise be a really wonderful relationship.
    Don’t define yourselves as a LD couple, and you won’t be one forever.






    Dear Miss U,

    My boyfriend and I are completely inseparable. He's absolutely perfect for me. We skype every night and during these times, we often bring up our future together.

    Yesterday, I flew back home from visiting his family for the first time and it was magical. Because of that, my whole understanding of what I wanted in my future. I didn't think I'd really like this New England town, but I was super wrong. Everything about this town was perfect: the weather, the vibe, the people, everything was great. I even began to think I could finish my education there due to the place being a university town (I had to leave my first college due to health issues). I felt more at home there than I do here in my own town.

    We once agreed that he would come down to California to start our future, but now I'm so lost in what to do. I would love to move with him in Connecticut but my family is a huge obstacle since they're very overbearing and not the most open minded when it comes to things like this.

    My entire perspective has been flipped and I'm lost. I have no one who could help me. I don't know what to do. What do you think Miss U? What can he or I do? What do you recommend?
    G



    Dear G,

    Personally I would think that moving away from your overbearing family would benefit you and the relationship. You don’t need people interfering with your life, especially at the point where you’re finding your feet as an independent adult and taking your relationship to the next level.

    With that said, visiting a place and living there are very different things and you need to realise that the added euphoria of being with your partner may have colored your perception of the place.

    With that said, this could end up being everything you dream of and more. If you want to move and have the ability to do so, go! This is your life, you have to live it for yourself. It doesn’t mean you don’t care about your family, or that you won’t still be part of each other’s lives, it just means you are doing what is right for yourself which is very important. Remember too that you are an adult. Your family can make things difficult for you. They can guilt the hades out of you. But they can’t actually stop you.

    If you want to move, make the plan, save the money, surround yourself with positive supportive people and follow through. People who care about you want to see you happy. Go be happy!

    Sincerely,
    Miss U.


      Posting comments is disabled.

    Categories

    Collapse

    Latest Articles

    Collapse

    • Miss You Issues: Write It Out
      by
      Dear Miss U, I have been having a tough time going through the distance. I love my boyfriend with all my heart, and I want nothing to come between us, but that is very difficult with my parents. My parents are very strict, I can't make any decisions in my life, and when I try to make a decision, I am usually yelled at and hit. Making me more and more depressed. The worst that has ever happened is that I have been choked by my own father by a decision I tried to make. Me and my loved one talk on...
      December 13, 2015, 08:40 PM
    • Miss You Issues: The Dawn Of LDR
      by
      Dear Miss U,

      I recently realized I had to move away from my boyfriend of 3 months, I want to know if there's anything I need to know about starting a long distance relationship? My boyfriend knows and really wants it to work as well.

      Zelda
      Dear Zelda, I feel the only thing people need to know about starting a long distance relationship is that you need to treat the relationship and your partner the same, regardless of proximity. That means making time for ea...
      December 10, 2015, 09:21 PM
    • Miss You Issues: Talking It Up
      by
      Dear Miss U, Me and my boyfriend have only ever met once and he proposed to me to be my girlfriend through phone calls. He's currently out of town because of his thesis and his work, and we haven't seen each other for half a year. We are both Cancers and very affectionate and I know he loves me, but sometimes he does this thing every month where he says that he is tired of our conversations everyday that seemed too monotone for him. He wants me to contribute more to the conversation and I swear...
      December 8, 2015, 04:27 AM
    • Miss You Issues: Life Or Love?
      by
      Dear Miss U, Recently you gave me advice on how to deal with the pain caused by such a large distance. It was fantastic advice and worked well but unfortunately I find myself in need of your advice again. I have been paying for a trip to India through an organization called world challenge and they are offering a once in a lifetime opportunity that could even help me get jobs etc. in the future, although it costs a lot of money and keeping up with payments can be stressful. I've also been lookin...
      November 30, 2015, 09:16 PM
    • Miss You Issues: Decisions
      by
      Dear Miss U, My partner and I both want to move in together since we have both had our fair shares of long distance relationships. He is trying to find a job here with no luck (he hates his job). I might have found one for myself in his town, and his family is way more supportive than mine. I am going to a tour around that prospective job in his town but I am dreading it. My current bosses are so nice to me. They even got my partner an interview here. My biggest concern is they just fin...
      November 26, 2015, 09:06 PM
    • Miss You Issues: Fat Shaming, Pregnancy & U.
      by
      Dear Miss U, The distance just makes things hard to fix. It seems I'm being a crappy girlfriend. I haven't been the best lately. I feel it's because I have resentment held. We've discussed it & it just hasn't gotten any better feeling for me. He has issues with my sexual style compared to his, but it's mostly about what's wrong with me. The other night over Skype, I was telling him about my chiropractor appointments to help my chronic muscle tension. Since the beginning, we've disc...
      November 23, 2015, 03:17 AM
    Working...
    X