I can understand why your parents would be disapproving, it's only been 9 months going on 10 and you are really young. It's not up to me to tell you what you should do and how long is long enough to be ready to get engaged, BUT what I can tell you about is the ways to move to America.

There is a couple ways - a marriage based visa, a work visa and the visa lottery.

As far as I understand, the problem with the work visa is that you and the company sponsoring you has to prove that your skills are superior to any American citizen looking for the same position and therefore they can hire you and sponsor you - this seems to be really difficult to achieve unless you are very good at a very specific skill!

The marriage based visas - there is two different types:
You either get married and then apply for a visa, which means you have to stay out of the US until you get your visa, but when you get your visa and greencard, you can stay and work immediately.

Or you apply for a fiancée visa that allows you to come to the states with intent to get married within 3 months of entry (you HAVE to get married or you have to leave) - then you have to adjust your status and apply for a work permit that lets you work as soon as you get it. However, your fiancé has to sponsor for you, which means he has to have a job and make at least 125% above the poverty guide lines, which in our case was over 25k a year.

We went the fiancée visa part, so if you need advice on that I can definitely talk you through.

The visa lottery is something I have only briefly looked into, but I know you can apply to get a visa and with tremendous luck you can get it, but I wouldn't bet on that.

More info on US Immigrated and Visa Guides (and they work, it helped me move here!):
https://www.visajourney.com/content/guides/

Hi snow,
Thanks for replying!

I understand I am quite young, I just feel like we're wasting time not being together when we could be and putting ourselves through all this pain. I wouldn't get engaged yet as we aren't even together in person now and would wait until at least the next time we see each other which will probably be months away.

Are you from the UK too? If so did you ever apply for the 6 month visa?

Thanks for all the information on the visas, it's very helpful and so is the site you linked. I've never heard of the visa lottery before! I know that the work visa would be unsuitable as I don't have any special skills. Once we get engaged I think we will do the fiancee visa, how long did this take to process for you?

Thanks again for your help.

OP, take a look at VisaJourney, everything you need to know is there, and especially for UK/US relationships.

I just thought I'd chime in here as well, as I'm currently going through the K1 visa process with my fiancé. I'm from the UK and he's a US citizen.

With regards to the visa lottery, it's my understanding that UK citizens are not eligible to enter. I believe that Northern Ireland is the only country in our neck of the woods that participates in the DV lottery.

Also OP, when you ask about the 6 month visa do you mean the B1/B2 tourist visa? I would caution against applying for said visa, especially seeing as the UK is a VWP country and if you apply and are denied the visa, you'll no longer be eligible for ESTA. And even though the B1/B2 visa allows up to 6 month stays at a time, there is no guarantee that you'll be granted that length of a visit. The amount of time you are given to stay in the country is determined by the CBP officers at the port of entry.

My fiancé and I sent in our K1 visa petition at the end of September 2016, and I have my medical next week () and my interview a fortnight after that. We've been pretty lucky in that the whole process has been smooth and fairly quick for us. It's actually gone a lot quicker than we originally anticipated! There's no way to accurately predict how long the process will take, but I believe 6 - 9 months is a rough estimate. I also second visajourney.com as an absolutely excellent source of help and information!

I hope this all makes sense...trying to type on my tiny little phone keypad isn't easy!

We started our process March 3rd 2014 and by November 21st 2014 I moved to America, so it took us 8 months!

However, for the both of you, I wanna share that even though I have lived here for 2 years, we are STILL doing visa stuff. Once you are married, you are required to apply to adjust your status ($1100) within the 90 days after you entered the US (or asap) and if you get your permanent residency (Greencard) before you have been married for 2 years (we got it after 8 months), you have to remove conditions ($800) within the 90 days prior to your greencard expiring which is June for us this year. Keep that in mind!

Hi littlewingxx,
Thanks for you reply.
That's a shame about the visa lottery but it wasn't a reliable way anyway.

I never thought about the B1/B2 visa, I didn't know I then wouldn't be eligible for the ESTA, but I think now I won't do it as that's a big risk. What's is the longest you've stayed with you fiance if you don't mind me asking? As I understand it the ESTA only allows for an up to 90 day stay which isn't very long, I was just wondering if there are any other solutions to staying in the US for longer at a time.

Congratulations on getting engaged! I'm glad the process is going well. It's such a long process and as I understand it as well as the medical and interviews you also have to provide documentation to show your meetings and proof of relationship? It's lot to be done which is a shame but will be worth it in the end!

Thanks again for your help and I wish you luck with your Visa application and hope it continues going smoothly for you.

Hi Snow,

Thanks for all this, it's very helpful to know how much it will all be costing etc.

Once you are married are you then able to live in the US and adjust your status or do you have to return to the country you're a resident of before doing so? Are you also able to return to your home country at any point after marriage?

^ This!

It's not just as straightforward as getting married and then that's it. I think a lot of people fail to realise that you're going through the process for a good few years afterwards!

I went over and stayed with my fiancé for the full 90 days. Of course I'd have loved to have stayed for longer, but I was glad I did get that time with him. It actually felt like longer than just 90 days, and it was good to get the opportunity to live the day to day with each other to get a proper feel of how we really are together.

It's a long, unromantic and tedious process! But it's worth it! You have to gather all your evidence of an ongoing relationship and submit that with the initial petition. It is a lot to do, but it's strangely satisfying to see your relationship compiled into a large sheaf of papers! I also think that the thought of it is a little more daunting, but once you actually get round to starting working on it, it's not so bad.

Thank you, and I'm hopeful our journey continues to go ahead smoothly. I'll just be so relieved once my interview is done!

Once you are married, you can stay in the US! With the adjustment of status package, you are going to apply for your work permit (Employment Authorization Document) and your re-entry permit (Advance Parole), this one let's you leave the country while you are waiting on your greencard! That is all included in the ~1100$ package!

Once you have a greencard, you are allowed to leave and re-enter the US as long as your greencard (and passport :P) is valid!

Thank you both for your replies, it's very useful.

I was also wondering how you manage to stay for in the US for a long time at one time.When I last went to the US for two months I left my job and found new employment. I know when going through customs they like you to have proof of work in your home country and I'm really worried as I'm starting a new job soon and I'm concerned that I might like it and have to leave my job in order to stay in the US for a long time. I think this would be the only option? I was just wondering how everyone manages this when visiting your SO?

I was lucky enough to have been a student at the time with a part time job at a school, so I left during school breaks.

The first time I visited for the full 90 days, I actually handed my notice in and left my job. I'd worked there for a long time and when I tried to take unpaid leave for part of my planned time away, they refused to cooperate with me. So I left. Looking back, I think I was fortunate that the CBP guy who spoke to me did actually let me in! I didn't realise at the time that my not having a job to go back to could have hurt my chances of even being admitted into the country. The second time when I went, I had a new job and I was able to take a block of annual leave for my time away. My second visit was only for a month. I was super paranoid about going through CBP this time after hearing so many horror stories of people being denied entry or taken to secondary, so I got a letter from my manager confirming that I had a permanent job, and also took copies of my rota for later on in the year. Turns out I didn't need it and I got through with zero issues, but I was glad to have it with me just in case.

OP, I am glad to see that you n' your b/f are giving it another go. Post-9/11 citizenship in the U.S. is tough. Before that, people could just come through the citizenship process easily.

Hi snow,

Im an aussie / brit looking to move to the us to be with my fiancee of a year, would love some tips on your fiance visa journey! Also, how did you go with the whole healthcare system transition? Do you have any tips on moving to the crazy country?