I've had a really bad year.
Hello. Apologies if my post is overly long, but sometimes you've got to put in all the factual stuff to be able to follow everything.
Past:
I was in a crappy "relationship" with a woman in Edinburgh (Scotland) this year, who I hadn't seen since I was 19 in 2005. I met her in 2005 because we both were in a charity shop doing unpaid work. She asked me out for some reason and after that first day, I'd go back to her area, just to be insulted by her younger friends. My girlfriend (Laura) only ever seemed to talk about money and one night she called me, and said I could come up. She said her pals were grounded, but I suspected she was telling lies. So I went there and they were there, so I decided to just quit seeing her as it wasn't gonna change. We weren't in contact for years after that night.
After 2006 ended and 2007 began, I had just lost a job and felt I should go see Laura again. However, she wasn't there and so I couldn't find her for several years. I also got a late diagnosis of having an autism spectrum disorder during 2007.
I tried to find Laura online, but only come across an inactive Bebo handle. Her neighbor Maggie contacted me on Gumtree and gave some tips on how to maybe find her. But I kind of scared her away by acting strange. I noticed she had put her real e-mail address in the headers of her messages, so I went on a hunt on Bebo and Facebook, to discover she was friends with my ex's mother. Then I contacted Laura's mother, but she said they had moved to Spain. They really were just there on a holiday. This online abuse from her friends and family members continued on for years.
I also had a senior support worker from my autism group pretend to be Laura's BF and take the piss out of me. He used an alias called Bruce Ritchie and sent me tons of abusive emails, putting in comments about songs by a band called The Smiths, which he knew I was a fan of. A support worker basically befriends you and takes you out on trips and that. When I asked him who this Bruce guy was in as little detail as possible, he denied he knew who he was. Then after about 2 years of sending me abusive emails, he was drinking and said something that gave himself away. Suddenly, he left the job and this bizarre turn of events was never met with a conclusion.
Present:
By the time I finally met up with Laura in March this year after I found her on Facebook, she claimed nobody informed her I was trying to get in touch. She also told me she had a boyfriend already named Matt, but it sounded like she was being mistreated by him. I then persuaded her to be with me. I went to her family's house at the weekend and not unlike the first year I knew her, her live in stepfather insulted me because he'd been drinking. It was reminiscent of when her friends bullied me in 2005.
Approximately one week after we first were reunited, we went to play pool with members of my autism group, which we played in a hired suite. After I was eliminated from a snooker tournament I was finishing off, I bought her a membership and we went to play pool by ourselves in the main area near the bar, and after a while, she got in a really bad mood. After we went back up the road, she went nuts at me because she believed I had promised to buy her an iPod. She had a habit of touching my iPod all the time, so I said I'd get her one when I next could afford it.
Because I'd broke my back to find her, I just bought her it to keep her amused. I didn't have enough cash, as I was shy of about £7, so I did a 3 month payment plan just so I could take it out of the Argos store. I knew I was going to get more money the next month, or so I thought, so I took it out of the store a done deal and used the money on other stuff. I then lost a lot of my benefit unexpectedly as it expired, so I had to request more DLA forms which meant I went around 5 months with no DLA. My regular fortnightly benefit had to go towards bills and food, so I struggled to pay up her iPod. Then she broke the dock on her iPod by putting in the USB charger forcefully, so I paid to repair it. However, she broke up with me in April, claiming she wanted to stay single and I knew she was still occasionally hanging out with Matt. She then apparently got a new BF called Steven, but she finished with him after a week and never spoke of him again. We then went in a restaurant, so I could have a meal with her and show I was the boyfriend for her. She kept fidgeting with her mobile the entire time we were there and putting her hair over the table in a bored looking position.
I tried to tell her mother on Facebook about the way Laura was behaving, but all she did was talk about my personal hygiene. Says I needed a good bath cos I was smelly in her home and saying I was 'slandering' Laura on Facebook.
As the months went on, Laura become acting more and more horrible. We had sex sometimes, but I had a difficult time getting aroused because of the constant high levels of stress and anxiety. Then she started to talk about STDs, so I told people about it and they thought she was still with her ex. I'd also tried to hug her sometimes or hold her hand, but she would screw up her face and say I needed to shave, or clench her fingers together so I couldn't hold her hand. The day we went to collect her iPod from the repair shop was probably the only great day we had.
She would visit her ex, but say she was meeting her sister. We went along a canal called the Union Canal and eventually, we ended up in an area near a friend's house. Laura said she was bursting for the toilet. She asked me to wait at the shops rather than at her friend's door, then Laura never returned. I'd been at her friend's door before but couldn't quite remember where it was, as it's a bit of a concrete jungle.
Well, her excuse was that she was tired and fell asleep. I don't believe that was what happened, but I cannot provide proof of her lies as she often lies via phone conversations. When she returned from England after her sister's hen night, she immediately went to see Matt instead of me, because I went to her house the day she was back in Edinburgh and her mother answered the door.
Then in June, I finally had enough of Laura not showing any affection. I went on her Facebook and told everybody what she was like, but they refused to listen. It made Laura hate me even more, even though I only did it cos she was bad to me. It wasn't until in August that we met up again. She had threatened to get the police, then as soon as I told her my DLA was reinstated, she invited me up for tea. I then admitted to seeing an escort, but she never said much other than it was a waste of money. We started to hang out again, but eventually she told me that she didn't want to see me again. I didn't understand why she was acting like this, so I went up to her flat which is fairly far from where I stay. But I wasted my time and I was refused entry. Laura tossed one of my DVDs out of her window and said I made her life hell, etc. After a while, she said I'd done nothing wrong.
I've tried calling her house since, but she's often been up to see Matt and her family can set their phone to silence so they don't even have to speak to me, not that they'll care. If I show up near her flat and press the buzzer, her stepfather runs down the stairs and threatens to break my glasses. The few times I have spoken to Laura, she says she's seen the light and doesn't need men in her life anymore. Laura basically said this is goodbye for good. Yet other times I'm told she's with Matt. Laura says we should never have met, plus she said I'm a tramp who sleeps with prostitutes and wears the same clothes, and then Laura tried to make out she's met another guy at her job center, but isn't ready for a relationship. I also got told that her family is moving away again soon and her sister is about to have her baby.
What should I do? Should I chase her or call it quits?
Past:
I was in a crappy "relationship" with a woman in Edinburgh (Scotland) this year, who I hadn't seen since I was 19 in 2005. I met her in 2005 because we both were in a charity shop doing unpaid work. She asked me out for some reason and after that first day, I'd go back to her area, just to be insulted by her younger friends. My girlfriend (Laura) only ever seemed to talk about money and one night she called me, and said I could come up. She said her pals were grounded, but I suspected she was telling lies. So I went there and they were there, so I decided to just quit seeing her as it wasn't gonna change. We weren't in contact for years after that night.
After 2006 ended and 2007 began, I had just lost a job and felt I should go see Laura again. However, she wasn't there and so I couldn't find her for several years. I also got a late diagnosis of having an autism spectrum disorder during 2007.
I tried to find Laura online, but only come across an inactive Bebo handle. Her neighbor Maggie contacted me on Gumtree and gave some tips on how to maybe find her. But I kind of scared her away by acting strange. I noticed she had put her real e-mail address in the headers of her messages, so I went on a hunt on Bebo and Facebook, to discover she was friends with my ex's mother. Then I contacted Laura's mother, but she said they had moved to Spain. They really were just there on a holiday. This online abuse from her friends and family members continued on for years.
I also had a senior support worker from my autism group pretend to be Laura's BF and take the piss out of me. He used an alias called Bruce Ritchie and sent me tons of abusive emails, putting in comments about songs by a band called The Smiths, which he knew I was a fan of. A support worker basically befriends you and takes you out on trips and that. When I asked him who this Bruce guy was in as little detail as possible, he denied he knew who he was. Then after about 2 years of sending me abusive emails, he was drinking and said something that gave himself away. Suddenly, he left the job and this bizarre turn of events was never met with a conclusion.
Present:
By the time I finally met up with Laura in March this year after I found her on Facebook, she claimed nobody informed her I was trying to get in touch. She also told me she had a boyfriend already named Matt, but it sounded like she was being mistreated by him. I then persuaded her to be with me. I went to her family's house at the weekend and not unlike the first year I knew her, her live in stepfather insulted me because he'd been drinking. It was reminiscent of when her friends bullied me in 2005.
Approximately one week after we first were reunited, we went to play pool with members of my autism group, which we played in a hired suite. After I was eliminated from a snooker tournament I was finishing off, I bought her a membership and we went to play pool by ourselves in the main area near the bar, and after a while, she got in a really bad mood. After we went back up the road, she went nuts at me because she believed I had promised to buy her an iPod. She had a habit of touching my iPod all the time, so I said I'd get her one when I next could afford it.
Because I'd broke my back to find her, I just bought her it to keep her amused. I didn't have enough cash, as I was shy of about £7, so I did a 3 month payment plan just so I could take it out of the Argos store. I knew I was going to get more money the next month, or so I thought, so I took it out of the store a done deal and used the money on other stuff. I then lost a lot of my benefit unexpectedly as it expired, so I had to request more DLA forms which meant I went around 5 months with no DLA. My regular fortnightly benefit had to go towards bills and food, so I struggled to pay up her iPod. Then she broke the dock on her iPod by putting in the USB charger forcefully, so I paid to repair it. However, she broke up with me in April, claiming she wanted to stay single and I knew she was still occasionally hanging out with Matt. She then apparently got a new BF called Steven, but she finished with him after a week and never spoke of him again. We then went in a restaurant, so I could have a meal with her and show I was the boyfriend for her. She kept fidgeting with her mobile the entire time we were there and putting her hair over the table in a bored looking position.
I tried to tell her mother on Facebook about the way Laura was behaving, but all she did was talk about my personal hygiene. Says I needed a good bath cos I was smelly in her home and saying I was 'slandering' Laura on Facebook.
As the months went on, Laura become acting more and more horrible. We had sex sometimes, but I had a difficult time getting aroused because of the constant high levels of stress and anxiety. Then she started to talk about STDs, so I told people about it and they thought she was still with her ex. I'd also tried to hug her sometimes or hold her hand, but she would screw up her face and say I needed to shave, or clench her fingers together so I couldn't hold her hand. The day we went to collect her iPod from the repair shop was probably the only great day we had.
She would visit her ex, but say she was meeting her sister. We went along a canal called the Union Canal and eventually, we ended up in an area near a friend's house. Laura said she was bursting for the toilet. She asked me to wait at the shops rather than at her friend's door, then Laura never returned. I'd been at her friend's door before but couldn't quite remember where it was, as it's a bit of a concrete jungle.
Well, her excuse was that she was tired and fell asleep. I don't believe that was what happened, but I cannot provide proof of her lies as she often lies via phone conversations. When she returned from England after her sister's hen night, she immediately went to see Matt instead of me, because I went to her house the day she was back in Edinburgh and her mother answered the door.
Then in June, I finally had enough of Laura not showing any affection. I went on her Facebook and told everybody what she was like, but they refused to listen. It made Laura hate me even more, even though I only did it cos she was bad to me. It wasn't until in August that we met up again. She had threatened to get the police, then as soon as I told her my DLA was reinstated, she invited me up for tea. I then admitted to seeing an escort, but she never said much other than it was a waste of money. We started to hang out again, but eventually she told me that she didn't want to see me again. I didn't understand why she was acting like this, so I went up to her flat which is fairly far from where I stay. But I wasted my time and I was refused entry. Laura tossed one of my DVDs out of her window and said I made her life hell, etc. After a while, she said I'd done nothing wrong.
I've tried calling her house since, but she's often been up to see Matt and her family can set their phone to silence so they don't even have to speak to me, not that they'll care. If I show up near her flat and press the buzzer, her stepfather runs down the stairs and threatens to break my glasses. The few times I have spoken to Laura, she says she's seen the light and doesn't need men in her life anymore. Laura basically said this is goodbye for good. Yet other times I'm told she's with Matt. Laura says we should never have met, plus she said I'm a tramp who sleeps with prostitutes and wears the same clothes, and then Laura tried to make out she's met another guy at her job center, but isn't ready for a relationship. I also got told that her family is moving away again soon and her sister is about to have her baby.
What should I do? Should I chase her or call it quits?
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