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    30+ Cybercheating

    What is it with cybercheating?

    Just found out during my stay at her place that she is cybercheating. Sextalks with other guys, online flirting with heavy sexual content.

    My god, my ex did the same.

    Think I wil have to say goodbey to my SO, but it hurts badly. Shitty situation, just being here a few days, wanting to leave now, not in 2,5 week...

    #2
    I'm really sorry to hear this. You deserve so much better!

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      #3
      Did you talk to her about it?

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        #4
        It's easy and it fills a void-my own personal opinion on why people do it. Any way, if you want to leave, go! Why stick around with this person you're going to break up with?



        Met online: 1/30/11
        Met in person: 5/30/12
        Second visit: 9/12/12
        Closed the distance: 1/26/13!!!

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          #5
          Originally posted by Quinlan View Post
          What is it with cybercheating?

          Just found out during my stay at her place that she is cybercheating. Sextalks with other guys, online flirting with heavy sexual content.

          My god, my ex did the same.

          Think I wil have to say goodbey to my SO, but it hurts badly. Shitty situation, just being here a few days, wanting to leave now, not in 2,5 week...
          Before you pack up your bags and go, talk to her about it.

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            #6
            I think this is a really grey area in a lot of relationships, and a lot of the time people don't see it as anything more than watching porn - albeit slightly more interactively.

            What is critical is to know what the boundaries are for you and your partner.

            If you have an issue with it, she needs to know, and if she can't stop herself because the loneliness or the like and you can't accept she is doing it, then you will need to end it one way or the other.

            but if you have not had this talk, and she doesn't know how you feel, it might be a little hasty to just run out and leave right now.

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              #7
              I had the talk with her about this problem. She sees no problem in it at all, saying I'm just jealous(?). After thinking about it al night I'm getting on the plane this afternoon, leaving her after I tell her I'm breaking up with her. Didn't sleep at her place tonight, actually didn't sleep at all, but hey, the club is open 24/7...

              Perhaps i'm old fashioned, but cybercheating is (in my humble opinion) as bad as real life cheating. Its the lie and the emotional cheating that wants to make me puke. But hey, she saves me quite a few bucks, the traveling to Portugal is over...

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                #8
                Originally posted by Quinlan View Post
                I had the talk with her about this problem. She sees no problem in it at all, saying I'm just jealous(?). After thinking about it al night I'm getting on the plane this afternoon, leaving her after I tell her I'm breaking up with her. Didn't sleep at her place tonight, actually didn't sleep at all, but hey, the club is open 24/7...

                Perhaps i'm old fashioned, but cybercheating is (in my humble opinion) as bad as real life cheating. Its the lie and the emotional cheating that wants to make me puke. But hey, she saves me quite a few bucks, the traveling to Portugal is over...
                I agree about the cyber cheating. It messes with your trust. My ex did it, and he acted on it, so I know where you're coming from. Sorry it ended the way it did.

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                  #9
                  I'm really sorry this happened to you.

                  And I agree that cybersex with strangers while in a relationship is cheating. You aren't being "jealous"
                  I thought of you and the years and all the sadness fell away from me - Pink Floyd

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                    #10
                    I'm really sorry.

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                      #11
                      So sorry for you, Quinlan.

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                        #12
                        Hello you all.
                        Must say my world did turn sunny recently. Fallen in love with a beautifull woman, few years younger.

                        And the most striking was the German saying "On a pile of manure grow the most beautifull flowers." (Auf dem Misthaufen wachsen die schönsten Blumen.)
                        Still slightly greeving for my ex, suddenly the beauty 'stood on my doorsteps'. We met through mutual friends and she is living in the Netherlands.
                        After many, many nightly talks we said to eachother "I would love to know you better, like your laugh, like your smell..."

                        I'll keep you posted.

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                          #13
                          Originally posted by Quinlan View Post
                          Hello you all.
                          Must say my world did turn sunny recently. Fallen in love with a beautifull woman, few years younger.

                          And the most striking was the German saying "On a pile of manure grow the most beautifull flowers." (Auf dem Misthaufen wachsen die schönsten Blumen.)
                          Still slightly greeving for my ex, suddenly the beauty 'stood on my doorsteps'. We met through mutual friends and she is living in the Netherlands.
                          After many, many nightly talks we said to eachother "I would love to know you better, like your laugh, like your smell..."

                          I'll keep you posted.
                          I'm glad you found someone else! You will heal in time from the hurt your ex gave you, I know it sounds repetitious but in most cases, it's completely true Wish you both the best of luck, and thank you for updating the post.

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                            #14
                            Everything is going well here, my love and I are talking about closing the gap... The netherlands has its own beauty, wonder how life will be for me over there.
                            The Dutch people seem nice, Utrecht is a funny city to live in, I suppose, Liked the bar Belgie, so many different sorts of beer, mjammie.

                            Ohw, by the way, about my cybercheating ex, friends told me she was allready in another relationship for a week or so and didn't care about my feelings.
                            Nice, Not only cybercheating but really cheating as well... Luckily she did not give me a 'relation present'! Hopefully she will get her act together, though.

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                              #15
                              Glad you found out before it went too far. Good luck in your new relationship!
                              sigpic

                              I love him. Forever. And every day after that.

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