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    3 days of no replies a week before visit..

    Hi guys!!

    So yea, the title basically says it; my SO, who usually texts me every single day, hasn't messaged me at all since tuesday.
    The last thing we said was our usual goodnight texts with "I love you" , and the very last message was a heart. Then on wednesday I knew he worked all day with no internet so I didn't expect him to be super talkative after, so I didn't start a conversation either. Before going to bed though, I wrote a "10 days!!" message, thinking I could then wake up to his reply. The next day he had opened the message but not replied. so then I was like oh .. and he read that in the middle of the night, but didnt say anything back. So I asked later in the day why he kept reading but not replying, and after that he just kept being online a bunch of times but without opening my messages. I asked if something was going on - online but no reply. (This is on messenger). Then I texted him on our couple app asking him to please get back to me cause this was scaring me. Opened, no reply. And after that he's been offline on the app (usually if he has wifi it will say minimized, meaning he must have deleted it or removed it since he was still online on messenger). The last thing I did was sending him a message before going to bed last night saying that I would really like for him to answer cause I was getting very worried whether he was even okay etc., he was online at the time, but hasnt been active since i wrote that - so 15 hours. I'm SO confused. I literally did nothing from what I can see. Other than maybe being very quick to ask if things are okay - I tend to do that a lot and it bothers him sometimes.

    The other thing is, that I am literally going to visit him for 6 weeks, I will be leaving on Tuesday ( in four days) for a trip for 5 days, and then me (and my friend!) are taking the bus to go see him. She's staying for 5 days, I'm staying till middle of May.... So I'm going to go no matter what, but why would he act like this when he was super excited about me coming just 3 days ago? I know you guys don't have an exact answer, but any stories or similar situations would be much appreciated. My plan is to just let him get some space now and not message him, cause I've said everything I can say... but what do I do if he doesnt reply before I leave for the states?? Help guys, ANYthing to get my mind better right now, cause I'm freaking the F out.

    Rant ova. Thanks so much in advance! <3
    Last edited by Jsm92; March 24, 2017, 09:10 AM.

    #2
    Maybe he is nervous and doenst know how to handle the situation so instead he just isn't handling it at all. Go to the visit and make a backup plan if it doesn't go as expected.

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      #3
      Like Rezie said he could indeed be nervous and freaking out about meeting you. Is this your first visit to see him. if so then the first visit is always very nerve wracking and worrying to some people. My SO ignored me for a good 3 days about a week before our first visit and then when she finally got back to me she said she didn't know how to explain how she was feeling to me so she thought it was better to stay away and try sort her on emotions out before replying to me. We're having our second visit soon and only lat week did she get really weird and snappy at me while we were talking and hung up a call really aggressively. She set me a message the next day saying that she's really anxious and worried about our visit and i'm starting to realise she just does that when she gets really worried about things. Your SO could be feeling the same way so although you shouldn't bombard him with messages, just send him a message maybe twice a day to say 'hey good morning i hope you ave a good day would be nice to hear from you' and a similar one at night. That will hopefully make him feel more relaxed and feel okay about talking to you.
      Best of luck no mater what happens :3
      my girls <3

      Josie (SO)
      Met online ~ 17th August 2017 ~
      Met in person ~ 30th August 2017 ~
      Became official ~ 15th September 2017 ~
      Closed the distance and moved in together! ~ 18th June 2018 ~

      Ash
      Met online ~ 21st November 2018 ~
      Met in person ~ 26th November 2018 ~
      Became official ~ 4th December 2018 ~
      All moved in together! ~ 30th May 2019 ~

      Comment


        #4
        Thanks for the replies!
        And still no reply from him...

        Its not our first trip we've been together for a year and a half , and known each other for more than two. I've been there for 3 long visits , last time was during last summer.
        And he's visited me twice, he spent Xmas and new years with me 2016/17 so very recently, and ended upnstayinf here for 6 weeks. So last time I saw him was February 1. When we said bye in the airport he completely broke down crying soooo hard :'( so we're really close and see each other quite a bit and text every single day that's why this is even weirder. :/

        Comment


          #5
          Odd thought, but... Assuming he uses his phone, might his phone have been stolen? Is there an alternate way he would use to contact you?
          Canadian permanent residence APPROVED!
          Closed the Distance: 09/26/2019
          Engaged: 09/26/2020

          Comment


            #6
            Hmmm I really doubt it and hes active at all the usual times, plus he's got a password to get into his phone so people wouldn't be able to go on fb etc which he has been . also he could have just used his laptop to tell me his phone had been stolen. So yea.. Kinda wish that was the case though :-(

            Comment


              #7
              Have you heard anything from him yet? Is this by chance your 1st meeting?
              If I were you I would just give him space & not contact him until the night before the trip to let him know you are coming out there flight details etc.
              It's pretty odd of him to just keep reading with no response, im hoping he gets his act together & contacts you soon. Is there someone mutual you could contact & maybe figure out whats going on with him??
              CLOSED THE DISTANCE FINALLY ON MAY 6, 2017

              Comment


                #8
                That's no way to treat someone even if you're nervous. 3 days of no contact? That's just cruel.

                I second kitty09's approach - can you try and reach him somewhere else? Skype? Per phone at work?

                Honestly, if that happened to me so close to seeing my SO, I would be pissed and consider not going.

                Relationship began: 05/22/2012
                First Met: 03/21/2013 - 03/30/2013
                Second Visit: 06/06/2013 - 08/21/2013 ~ Proposal: 07/06/2013 ♥
                Third Visit: 10/09/2013 - 01/08/2013
                Closed the distance: 11/20/2014 ♥
                Married: 1/24/2015
                Became Resident: 9/14/2015

                Comment


                  #9
                  That's just plain odd! I would call him, regular phone to phone call. did he have his phone stolen? Did anything else happen, like a fight? since it's Tuesday... I hope you made it and can get online and tell us you made it ok..
                  Sparkling72

                  "Strength in Us!"


                  "exclusive" since May 13, 2016
                  ** Shortened the distance!! December 2016 **
                  closing the distance in ~ Oct. 2018

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Did you get an answer?

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