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I feel like if im ruinning my SO's life..

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    I feel like if im ruinning my SO's life..

    I dont want to sound dramatic, but he's from Australia and im from Mexico, our plan is me moving there, but he wants to have a great job before i get there and a house for both, so lately he has been really stressed about all this, and i feel like if it wasn't for me he would still have a relaxing life as always, what should i do? Someone have been in the same situation?

    I feel really lost and i don't really have someone to talk who understad our situation...

    Thanks in advance for any reply.

    #2
    Originally posted by Pat93 View Post
    I dont want to sound dramatic, but he's from Australia and im from Mexico, our plan is me moving there, but he wants to have a great job before i get there and a house for both, so lately he has been really stressed about all this, and i feel like if it wasn't for me he would still have a relaxing life as always, what should i do? Someone have been in the same situation?

    I feel really lost and i don't really have someone to talk who understad our situation...

    Thanks in advance for any reply.
    Well, you've only been in the relationship for 6 months. That's a lot of pressure for someone that quickly - even if you lived in the same location.

    I would start with researching the Visa process before anything. What kind of a Visa are you going over on? There are multiple types and each one has different requirements. That, in itself, can take quite a long time and a good amount of money. Start with that before him worrying about a great job and a house. See what you have to do, the amount of time each step takes, if you need an immigration lawyer to help, etc. Once you have a timeline on that, that will probably relieve some of the pressure regarding the job and house.
    To those who dream, nothing is ever far away.

    ​Distance is to love as wind is to fire. It blows out the little ones and fans the big ones.

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      #3
      Just what she said... one step at a time and have patience. Saving that kind of money takes a lot of time and you both have to do your part.
      Sparkling72

      "Strength in Us!"


      "exclusive" since May 13, 2016
      ** Shortened the distance!! December 2016 **
      closing the distance in ~ Oct. 2018

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        #4
        Thank you!
        Yeah, we just have a huge talk the other day and we agreed​ and doing stuff one step at a time

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          #5
          Agree with everyone else. Me and my SO have been working on moving on to the next step and it is very overwhelming, and the way we're approaching it is also one step at a time. And trust me, it is helpful. You're very early in your relationship so you have time to figure things out. It is very important to have a general idea of what the finishing point is and all the steps needed to get there, and then it is a lot easier (both mentally and phisically) to work on each step. Then it won't feel like climbing a huge mountain. Oh, and also working together, you're a team

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            #6
            Originally posted by Pat93 View Post
            I dont want to sound dramatic, but he's from Australia and im from Mexico, our plan is me moving there, but he wants to have a great job before i get there and a house for both, so lately he has been really stressed about all this, and i feel like if it wasn't for me he would still have a relaxing life as always, what should i do? Someone have been in the same situation?

            I feel really lost and i don't really have someone to talk who understad our situation...

            Thanks in advance for any reply.
            I guess you have to see it this way, he is doing it because he wants to and in the long run him working more will benefit him mainly anyway! whatever money or investment he gains it will be beneficial to him. But trust me when someone means so much to you the extra effort is not felt to be a burden!
            But I completely understand you, my man is moving to my country in 3 months, we will be living together and I feel guilty knowing that he is dropping everything to come to me! in the long run both parties are making sacrafices some way or another, what is important is that you both match eachother's efforts

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