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Is he not excited about seeing me?

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    Is he not excited about seeing me?

    So a month ago he buys my ticket. We like to try for monthly but life got busy. So, this time I'm sort of dying as I count down, as it will be 2 months. As was the last. I'm excited that since it's a holiday weekend we get extra time. Made the wait easier. So I'm talking to him today, and he mentions his son could be in a playoff on our Saturday. He didn't realize, it's only a few hours, but I can't go (Not how I want to meet his son, and it would be a big day if his team made it that far.) I was a bit disappointed but that's life. Then he mentions all the rest of our time. I said, "wait, I'm leaving Tuesday at Noon." He thought I was leaving Monday morning. Which is my usual, not holiday weekend departure. He said I have to work. I'm so surprised I'm not talking. I've been counting down and delighting in this time. He runs the company he works for, so his time is flexible. If he can't be flexible, he must have a big meeting (hence our long weekend was forgotten). It seems like I'm only one looking forward to this. It hurts, and I'm beginning to feel foolish. He says he wants to marry me. He's truly wonderful and thoughtful. I am beginning to think I'm just going to be in the way.

    #2
    Sometimes people have a lot of things going on in their heads. It looks like he has / had. In the end, you're quite contradicting yourself.

    I can imagine you are disappointed, but if he has his own business, you should understand that. If it's important - and some things are even more important then your SO - then it can happen.

    Again, I understand you're disappointed, but why don't you ask him (on cam) if he wants to see you?
    Distance means nothing when someone means everything.

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      #3
      How am I contradicting myself? He IS very busy. And a great father. But the thing is, shouldn't I be important too? I am ok with him fitting me into his life as he can. But when he hears me say that he says I'm always on his mind, and the most important, after his kids. When we have our weekends, I do expect to be his focus. When we only have such little time, I look forward to it.

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        #4
        Originally posted by Saralovesjason View Post
        He says he wants to marry me. He's truly wonderful and thoughtful. I am beginning to think I'm just going to be in the way.
        In my opinioin here...

        Of course I agree you should be his focus, but fact is he has a job (be happy he has one!) and children, that should be important to him too. So you, of course you should be important to him and as I get the general idea you are to him, but at the same time he is busy.

        Why don't you go with him to the play-offs, for example?
        Last edited by erwin1973; May 11, 2017, 03:27 PM.
        Distance means nothing when someone means everything.

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          #5
          Originally posted by Saralovesjason View Post
          How am I contradicting myself? He IS very busy. And a great father. But the thing is, shouldn't I be important too? I am ok with him fitting me into his life as he can. But when he hears me say that he says I'm always on his mind, and the most important, after his kids. When we have our weekends, I do expect to be his focus. When we only have such little time, I look forward to it.
          The thing is, everything can't be equally important all at once, there has to be priorities that evolve all the time. That weekend, his business and his kids are more important than you, that's just how it is. You aren't unimportant, just not as important as the things he has to do, you'll be back to your regular importance next time, most likely. Life happens, and when mature adults get into an LDR, sometimes it gets in the way of the relationship temporarily, especially where kids and work are involved. I think you're being too sensitive, especially considering your frequent visits. Just be there, have a good time where you can, and don't get hurt by something neither of you can control. It's OK to be disappointed, but don't let it ruin your trip.
          Our separation of each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. ~Albert Einstein

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            #6
            I've not yet met his son. Seems like it would be distracting to have me there. He's being recruited by colleges, so I don't want to distract him.

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              #7
              Thank you everyone. Great advice. He called me earlier, and said we needed to talk about it because he could tell I was hurt. Yes, I'm quite sensitive, and I'm lucky he loves that about me. He told me what I meant to him, and told me how happy he was that i was coming soon. I am so tender about and protective of our time. I hope i can loosen up and relax about it some day. I've loved him for 2 years.

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