Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

career change and distance

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    career change and distance

    I've currently been with my boyfriend for 3 years in Feb 18... we live 240 miles away... its only 2 hours away on train and 4 hours drive 30 mins on plane... It that respect we are lucky... but travel us so expensive... I can move to his town but it's financially better for us to live in my area... we are both in England UK. .. He wants to do his flying course... basically close the distance very very soon to be in my area and do flying course here outdoors in unreliable weather remembering it is going to get worse or pay double (im talking 10 grand) to do a flying course in his area indoors which could provide more opportunities for when he lives over here... and still have the opportunity to do the other type of flying in my area when the weather is efficient... I don't want be selfish but I just can't wait for the day we get to wake up together and go to sleep together... I'm constantly pining for him... I miss him so much...

    #2
    how long is the flying course? I would say that your job is to say "you really should do the course that is the most fit for you. I would love to close the distance soon but at the moment your education is more important and we will sort everything out". it's his career and decision. I would keep my mouth shut and not influence him.

    Comment


      #3
      It's a matter of months indoors and outdoors... I don't want him to think I don't want to be with him... and the longer we do LDR the more we just bicker at anything... He's a very indecisive person... I'm totally positive about us... we are opposites and balance each other out... The longer we are long distance the more expensive travel is...

      Comment


        #4
        honetly I'm having hard time reading and understanding your messages so I hope I'm responding to the question you tried to ask.

        yes it sucks to be in LDR and it is expensive. But we are talking about his education and career. It should be only upto him. if the course lasts months (I know it feels long) it is.managable to continue in LDR if he decided the other course is better for him

        Comment


          #5
          Compared to most LD relationships, you have several options. You can visit - even if travelling is a bit expensive. You say you have the option to move to him, but choose not to because financial situation makes where you live more attractive. He too wants to close the distance by moving to you, rather than you to him. So you agree in this. He has the uppertunity to take courses (I imagine rather short ones) to advance his career and that postpones him coming to you a bit, but if it will help you financially, or boost him with giving him more options, it looks like an easy choise, to just wait a bit more.

          In our case, my SO wanted to finish his bachelor where he lives - which can not be done in my country as we dont have this exact line of education. Had he chosen not to do it, he could have started a full time all year job much sooner, and started to preper for our move much sooner. But I wanted him to finish what he started, so I let him. In addition to it being helpful in his job, and helping him when he moves here, it also boosted his self esteem because he was never that good at school and actually failed another bachelor (different subject) before he met me. So being able to finish this was a big thing for him and I never let him forget that from all his sacrifice, he actually made it happen. I am very proud of him.

          I know being apart is so hard, but try to be supportive and start planning in small ways how you will do things after he finished his classes. That way, you will have something to look forward to.
          I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
          - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



          "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

          Comment


            #6
            Thank you for your replies... It helps to talk to people in similar situations...

            Comment

            Working...
            X