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any words of wisdom or comfort would be greatly appreciated

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    any words of wisdom or comfort would be greatly appreciated

    My bf and I have been together for little over 8month and have done long distance the whole time. At first it was great, we visited each other about every 3weeks or so and were talking consistently. 5months ago he went off to do some military training, so now he doesn't have wifi, so goodbye Skype calls, goes into the field for 2 weeks at a time, so goodbye any form of communication. Then when he is back it's for 2 days and he spends most of it sleeping (which he desperately needs after being in the field) and spending time with his friends. now I'm not oppose to him spending time with them but his in the field with them and we have a policy that when we're with people we don't text very much, which means I don't hear from him for most of the day. and then after those two days he's back in the field. I'm just getting fucking tried.

    #2
    Welcome to the wonderful world of military relationships!
    They're really difficult, but absolutely worth it in the end when you can be with your s/o again. Sometimes the only thing you can do is just keep pushing through it, keeping yourself busy and reminding yourself this is only temporary. Tell him that you miss him and you'd like to talk to him a little more. See if you can set aside days where you two have phone dates or something else that he can easily accomplish given his circumstances. It isn't going to be easy, but you can get through this

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      #3
      I was in the military so I'm familiar with what it is to have someone waiting back home. It helps that if you are not sitting and waiting, though, and that you keep yourself busy while he is in the field.

      Here is advice from my own experience that I offer to folks who get caught up in waiting for the next text from their partner:

      Are you a student? If yes, go to school. Focus on school.
      Are you gainfully employed? If yes, go to work and be present at work.
      Have friends? If yes, spend time with them. Enjoy yourself.
      Have hobbies? If yes, spend time on your hobbies.
      Have family? If yes, spend time with them.
      Have interests? If yes, spend time on those things you are interested in.
      Have internet? Read about the stages of relationships so that you will be knowledgeable about how relationships grow.
      Exercised today? If not, go for a walk or jog or bike ride. Get active.
      If you answered no to all of the above, change your life so that you can answer yes to some of these things.

      Be a whole person so that you can be a whole person in a relationship. Become a priority and have a great relationship with yourself. Do not rely on your partner to complete you. Be a complete person whose partner is a positive addition to your life.

      I also want to add that if you want time with him while he is off that you clearly communicate that you want time with him. Folks are not mind readers, and I never pretend to be a mind reader. Sure he wants downtime with his friends, however if you want time with him, please communicate clearly that you do want time with him.

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        #4
        Originally posted by Harlequin View Post
        Welcome to the wonderful world of military relationships!
        They're really difficult, but absolutely worth it in the end when you can be with your s/o again. Sometimes the only thing you can do is just keep pushing through it, keeping yourself busy and reminding yourself this is only temporary. Tell him that you miss him and you'd like to talk to him a little more. See if you can set aside days where you two have phone dates or something else that he can easily accomplish given his circumstances. It isn't going to be easy, but you can get through this
        Totally agree with this

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