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    Should I break up with her

    Hi
    Me and my so were doing great until one day after a good conversation we say goodnight to each other. Later that night I tried to send her a message and find out she have blocked me. The next morning she sent me a message and I ask her what happened she told me that she have not blocked me but later that day she deleted the app we used to talk and contacted me using a different number telling me that something was wrong with her other phone number. All of this was very weird and confused me a lot because we were fine just a couple of days ago.
    But things get worst, after that she told me she was very busy with work and that she needed 3 days to fix everything but the next day she texted me saying that she doesn't have time for a relationship right now and that she needs to focus on herself and that if I want I can move on. BUT the next morning I woke up to some other texts of her telling me that she was wrong and that she is sorry and that she misses me and wants to come see me soon and that she needs 7 more days to fix everything with work and then she will explain everything and that we will be ok.
    I don't know how she expects to things be ok after all this. After that message we haven't talk or anything and I'm just waiting for her to call next week.
    I don't know what to do. Should I break up with her?? I feel disappointed and disrespected in a way ... this was so out of character of her and I feel like she is hiding something but I don't know.
    I would like to know your opinions and what would you do in this situation

    #2
    Honestly, I would leave. That just sounds like a headache, and I don't understand why she needs a certain amount of days to tell you what is going on. If something truly was going on, I know I'd tell my s/o ASAP. I agree that it sounds like she's hiding something, but after all this, I don't know if I'd want to stick around to find out.
    EDIT
    If things truly are tough right now, then the fact that her initial reaction is to block and then break up with you is a bad sign. That's not how a grown adult should handle stress.

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      #3
      Hard to say without knowing her reasons. If her way of handling stress is to block you then it's not a good sign. But if she didn't infact block you but something weird is going on then it's suspicious but not necessarily a deal breaker. Her way of handling things is not good and if it's just work stuff then I would let the relationship go. But if there is someething truly massively terrible and stressful going on and this has never happened before then I would consider

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        #4
        To me it looks like she is playing games with you. Unless she is emotionally very unstable, she is playing you. You don't want to be played with (believe me, I've been played with). For your own sake, get out.
        Distance means nothing when someone means everything.

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          #5
          Yeah I also think there is something fishy about it. I think I will just listen to her excuse and see what she have to say.
          I don't know what happened I just came back to see her a month ago everything was perfect I met her parents and her best friend I don't know.
          Thanks for the replies I will update after I talk to her

          Comment


            #6
            I'd suggest to be firm with her and ask her to tell you what's wrong ASAP and not in 7 days, express how this is making you feel and how it's driving you on the edge. If she still refuses to talk to you about it and consider your feelings as well, then you'll have easier time deciding. I doubt you'll get closure if you break up right now anyway.

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              #7
              Do you think I should push right now for an answer? After she basically ask for time?
              Like you say I won't get closure if u dump her right now I want to know what's going on and if she cannot give a very good excuse I'll get out of there right away

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by Onlineguy84 View Post
                Do you think I should push right now for an answer? After she basically ask for time?
                Like you say I won't get closure if u dump her right now I want to know what's going on and if she cannot give a very good excuse I'll get out of there right away
                I have no idea. If you can last those 7 days and if you still can keep the clear mind when you two talk and if you will distinguish between excuses and actual reasons, then I think it's better to wait, but not more than 7 days. Just set some limit or something, I guess. But you do have a right to know things and not to have to take 10 days long breaks when stressful situations arise, it's a very immature handling from her part if she's not hiding anything.

                It also depends on whether the whole blocking thing and removing the app thing was what actually happened. I don't know, the whole situation is full of suspicious details and you can never say for sure if it's this or that. So wait if clarity is more important for your own wellbeing and if getting it is worth more than the emotional peace right now. Basically do things that are the most comfortable for you and prioritise yourself.

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                  #9
                  In the beginning you said that she was inconsistent. I can't say whether you should stay or go. But I will say this, it is likely that if you choose to stay that you may have to accept that she might remain inconsistent. You can ask for some better boundaries and guidelines round her putting you off.

                  We can't change other people, but we can ask that they treat us better. If they consistently choose to not treat us better, then we have a choice to say or not.

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