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    Going on a cruise... he's not too happy...

    Well, my best friends fiance left her (16 weeks pregnant) and so she gave me his cruise ticket. A week on a Mexican cruise. Sounds amazing. But he's ruining it for me. He doesn't trust my "single" friend. Or any of her family going. I wish he would just trust ME enough to relax. But he won't and it's driving me crazy. I heard they have wi-fi on the boat so thats good we can chat and web cam but, he said that it doesn't change anything. *sigh*

    He's acting like I'm going JUST to hurt him. But I'm not. This is an amazing opportunity. A week long cruise, free to me. Why can't he be happy for me? Ugh. It's not even like I'm going to be leaving his side to go on this cruise. We're long distance anyways. & I heard that cruises now have cell reception on the boat. Does anyone know if this is true?

    #2
    Cruise ships do have wi-fi and cell reception, but their cell rates are extremely high, so you may want to check those before talking on them. Also, most of the cruise lines I have been on charge a fee to use their internet. I went on a cruise last September without my SO and we didn't talk until I landed back at the home port.

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      #3
      I hope you are not reconsidering going based on your so's insecurity issues. You are right, it is an awesome opportunity and you should def go. I don't think you should have to justify to him how you are not going to cheat on him. If there is internet send him a couple emails, if not he'll have to learn to deal. But don't just miss out on it on account that he doesn't trust you.

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        #4
        Definately go on the cruise. Because if he doesn't trust you enough (it goes hand in hand with how much he loves you too), that he's just not worth it. He can't chain you up in a dungeon. My SO had to leave me for a week and back then I was worried but it was just having to trust him and all came out well.

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          #5
          I think it's one thing to be distrusting, but another to take it personally and say the only reason you're going is to piss him off. He needs to learn the world doesn't revolve around him and that you going off for a few days doesn't mean you don't love him. It's a silly reason to get mad.

          Do what you want to do and if he can't accept your decision then that's tough cookies on him because it's egg on his face if he has the gall to call it quits over a cruise. I don't know how much sense you're going to be able to talk into him before you go or even during if you are able to use their wi-fi, but I'm sure after he'll either chill out or just grumble when all his suspicions turn up false and unjustified.

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            #6
            I'd definitely go on the cruise. I mean, on one hand, he is kind of being protective of you to make sure you don't get hurt, but there's a fine line between being protective and being controlling. Maybe if you told him how much of an opportunity this is and how you might not have this chance again, maybe he'll soften to the idea. If he's still not up to the idea and he's willing to leave over all of this, then it's his problem.
            National Novel Writing Month Participant- 2010, 2011, 2012
            National Novel Writing Month Winner- 2010, 2011, 2012

            Current Writing Project: Wait Until Next Year

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              #7
              I think you should go on the cruise. It's an amazing opportunity, one that many people would love to have. Maybe by being forced to trust you, your SO will learn that he can trust you in these types of situations.
              "I'll hold you in my heart till I can hold you in my arms again."


              "It's supposed to be hard! If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. The hard...is what makes it great! -A League of Their Own

              Met: August 22, 2010
              Made it official: September 17, 2010
              Got engaged: January 15, 2012
              Our First Visit: November 18, 2010-November 28, 2010
              Our Seventh (and Last) Visit: November 10, 2012-November 24, 2012
              Got married: November 21, 2012
              Big Wedding Date: May 25, 2013
              Closed the Distance: June 2, 2013

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                #8
                Holy crap, a free cruise? You better go, opportunities like this rarely, if ever, come up.

                All you can do with your SO is make it clear to him that you're not doing this to piss him off, you're doing this because it's an amazing opportunity that you probably will never get again. So tough luck. I've never been on a cruise so I can't comment on the availability of the wifi and such, but even so he should not begrudge you the chance to go on a free cruise.


                "You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty."
                -- Anonymous

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                  #9
                  He should be happy for you. Go. And have fun.

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                    #10
                    Hmm, may I ask why he doesn't trust your friend or her family? Does he think she may do something to you or influence you badly? I can understand why he'd be upset in that he's going to miss you while you're away for awhile since I'm sure we've all felt that pang of jealousy of not getting to be with our SOs when it comes to things like this, but I find it a little odd that he's making you feel so guilty for something you hadn't even planned yourself. It does sound like he's just being protective of you but I think it sounds like something you need to ask him to explain to you a bit more since I personally can't really understand why he'd feel like you were doing it to hurt him.

                    Speaking from my own experience, my boyfriend just informed me he and his family are taking a 3 week long cruise right over the date of our 2nd year anniversary. And I admit, yeah, I got upset. But it wasn't AT him, moreso the fact that I feel like these are the types of experiences we should get to share sometimes and the distance just makes that really difficult. So perhaps your boyfriend is feeling something similar?

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                      #11
                      Definitely go on your cruise. He's being irrational here, your girlfriend is 16 weeks pregnant, you guys aren't exactly gonna be partying like rockstars, y'know? A free cruise is not something that comes along everyday, and he should be really happy for you. Too bad if he doesn't like/trust her or her family, to be honest, anyone who says the BS line "I trust you, not them/him/her" is lying, whether they realize it or not. What does their mistrust in someone else have to do with you? If he thinks you're that easily influenced, and can't control yourself when you're with them, he doesn't trust you.

                      If I were you, I'd let him know you're going and that's it. If he can't trust you, you need to have a serious discussion - after you've gotten back, tanned, rested and relaxed
                      Our separation of each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. ~Albert Einstein

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                        #12
                        You should absolutely go on the cruise. That is a once in a lifetime opportunity.. why would you give that up? That is his insecurity, not yours.. You need to just keep reassuring him that nothing is going to happen and he should trust you enough to know that.
                        Live.Laugh.Love.ALWAYS.

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                          #13
                          Originally posted by Moon View Post
                          Definitely go on your cruise. He's being irrational here, your girlfriend is 16 weeks pregnant, you guys aren't exactly gonna be partying like rockstars, y'know? A free cruise is not something that comes along everyday, and he should be really happy for you. Too bad if he doesn't like/trust her or her family, to be honest, anyone who says the BS line "I trust you, not them/him/her" is lying, whether they realize it or not. What does their mistrust in someone else have to do with you? If he thinks you're that easily influenced, and can't control yourself when you're with them, he doesn't trust you.

                          If I were you, I'd let him know you're going and that's it. If he can't trust you, you need to have a serious discussion - after you've gotten back, tanned, rested and relaxed
                          THANK YOU.

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                            #14
                            I can tell you from first hand experience, a cruise has astronomical rates as far as wi-fi and cell phone usage. They should have computers available with the internet set up, and as someone else suggested send e-mails. Anything more than that, would probably cost you an arm and a foot.

                            Secondly, unless there is reason for him to have been upset from some past event or circumstance, he should in no way shape or form hinder you enjoying this experience. Period. End of story.

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                              #15
                              I think Im in the same boat (haha) Im going on a cruise to mexico too. My bf didnt come out I dont want you going but when I told him he was really hesitant about it. My friends dont really like him because of those incidents in the beginning of our relationship and he thinks they're out to sabotage him. lol I already paid and got my passport so Im going and I think you should too

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