I feel like my blogs go up and down from good to bad, never really staying in one emotion for very long.

Anyway, so...things have changed in a week. I spoke to RJ on Wed and we arranged to have a date on Thursday last week. I was super excited, we had been teasing each other with dirty texts the entire week. I went shopping with my BFF Wed and was sooo ready for Thursday to come.

When Thur rolled around, I got a text at about 8:30am in the morning. I'm never up that early and I never leave my phone on but that morning I did. The text said "we need to talk, text me when you wake up" In retrospect I really should have waited until I actually woke up to respond but the text was ominous enough. I've had the we need to talk conversations with guys I've been dating...I knew it wasn't good. I texted him and he called me. The conversation more or less went like this. He said his Wife called (yes his wife, they had been separated for 10 months and hadn't spoken for 8. And he had sent her divorce papers). Apparently the call brought up a lot of unresolved feelings for him and he felt like it wouldn't be fair to continue to see me under these circumstances. I'm not sure why I was so calm, but I was basically just like ok, you have my number if something changes. I also asked him to keep me in the loop as to what happens.

Needless to say I didn't sleep the rest of the day. Which just isn't good because I had to work the overnight that night. I hung out with a friend and did my best to not let what happened bother me. I got a ton of texts from my friends as well trying to make me feel better. One of my friends however, brought up a very interesting point that for some reason clicked in my head. She said it was 'convenient' that his wife called after 8 months of no contact after he had been seeing someone for a month. Kinda like she got wind of it and decided to step in. I don't know her, I don't know if its something she would do but from what he had told me of her antics I wouldn't put it past her. He had told me they were gonna talk a little more in depth that night, so I text him the next day to see if anything had become of it.

We texted for 3 hours. It was probably the most infuriating conversation I've ever had with someone. He is very very confused at to what to do in this situation. She hurt him really really bad, with a lot of cheating, putting him down, and moving her new bf into their apt after he moved out. So, I'm not entirely sure what he's confused about. Yes, love makes you do things you wouldn't normally consider but damn. Its like hes glutton for punishment. He said he is hung up on the sanctity of marriage...and i replied with, if you don't respect those marriage vows what marriage are you talking about. I also made it clear, I thought he'd be ******ed to get back with her but it was advice I'd be giving anyone. Friend, family, etc., it wasn't bc I wanted him. He paid me a ton of compliments, beat himself up for hurting me and thanked me for a awesome month. He promised to let me know what ultimately happens when he gets his head back on straight and they talk face to face.

Its just so infuriating! I mean I'm super glad it happened early on before this got serious but i'm so pissed about the whole thing. Why do girls have to play mind games? If you are being indecisive about being with someone it means there is a huge problem and a lot of doubts. And both of them aren't sure what they want. And why the hell do I care so damn much? UGH! I feel like I care sooo much about other people, no matter how long or short a time they are in my life. Their problems become my problems and I worry. My concern for him is that he's gonna give in and get back together with her and history is going to repeat itself and he's going to get hurt again. Bah! There you have it my drama for the week! lol!