Leopards can't change their spots. Once a cheater always a cheater. I've heard it all before, and I reject it. People change, they grow up, learn their lessons.

Maybe other people, I guess. But not me.


I'm getting ahead of myself here. Let's start with yesterday and work our way through. This will probably be long, as it's mostly for my records. Sorry ZB.

Yesterday, my sister and I went and saw this psychic. He was local, had awesome reviews/testimonials, but mostly I just did it to support my sister. The idea was I'd be read first, she'd see there was nothing to worry about, then she'd have her turn. It was only after I'd booked us in that he told me we couldn't sit in on each others readings. Sometimes secrets come out unexpectedly, he said. I'm pretty sure we don't have secrets between us - there's even things I know that her husband doesn't - And if she's not the first to know something in my life she's always the second. But anyway. I went in first, and if it was really bad I could have told her not to go in, kind of thing.

Seeming I've been in this line of work, and been read before, she trusts my opinion on such things.

Anyway, I rambled there.

I go in. His set up is shoddy, working from the front room of his house. A folding card table, typical purple velvet cloth, next to a computer desk with a lamp. Bunches of cables on the floor. I accidentally put my purse on one that looked like a laptop cable and the lights went out. This is neither here nor there, but I think he could work a little on his ambiance. Though if you've got the talent, it doesn't really matter.

He had an interesting style, drawing on my hand with a pen as he went. I suspect he's one of those people who can do channeled writing. But that's beside the point. I was curious if he would tell me the same things the gypsy in the caravan told me. Though, I expected him to be far better as he cost me three times as much.

He told me some really good, accurate things. Or things I felt to be both true and couldn't have been canvased. He told me I can expect to live a long life, but also asked me if I'm doing drugs/smoking/eating a lot of take away because he could sense a lot of toxins around me. The life line on my left is a lot shorter than my right, which apparently signified I'm making some bad choices, or may have in the past. He picked up that I was exposed to a great deal of second hand cigarette smoke when I was younger. Health wise, I wonder about this stuff, he's like "I sense you're not as fit as you used to be", and I'm not sure how to compare that. I mean I used to walk for 2+ hours five days a week, and do yoga every other day if not every day. But at that time I was also eating poorly (or most of the time barely eating at all. Nowadays I'm pretty good with eating decently, I go to the gym, I don't drink or smoke or do drugs and I'm unmediated. So I was thinking "All people have the potential to live longer if they eat right and exercise" and "I wonder if the pizza last night is the cause of this?" haha

He went on to tell me that the most common impression people have of me is that I'm smart. And that's nice. If it's not true, don't tell me! lol And that I have excellent communication skills both verbal and written. He could tell I've done many different small jobs but that I don't have a career and I've always worked part-time. Apparently I will nail my career (in communications - talking and writing.) when I'm 30, settle in and start making serious cash. As I age I become more and more ambitious and will care more about comfort and luxury. That's already a bit of a trend for me now honestly, so I'll be keeping an eye on that. Appreciation for fine things is great, but I don't want to be a materialistic greedy snob or anything.
Between 30 and 60, I'm becoming comfortably wealthy, not filthy rich, but better than average. I can handle that! He also sees me owning my first and second home, and then going on to have several rental properties. Which was great! I've always wanted to play with real estate, but there's no way he could have known that.
He told me I'll likely study again, part time, mostly for fun, off and on through my life. That does suit my personality.

Now it gets weird. He picked up that I have "underlying blues and confidence issues" many of which stem from when I was "under mothered" between the ages of 12-15. Interesting. This was when I was a serious cutter. And mum had so many of her own issues... yes, "under mothered" is a great description of that period of my life. My depression issues did start then, even if I don't really believe that's what causes my bouts now. I'm pretty sure I just have a bit of a chemical imbalance, because I don't consciously feel bitterness or resentment, hurt or abandonment towards my mum or childhood, though I once did. Weirdly, I admitted that I'd been diagnosed with depression and he told me "No, you don't have depression, you just get the blues." Ah alright dude.

Anyway, when I hit magic 30 (or 29 or 31, he said I need to cut him some slack, it's hard to be exact, and I know that's true.) Those issues will be all gone. I will be cured. That's pretty cool, I accepted long ago that I'd battle depression and anxiety forever, but apparently not. My "confidence" issue, he says is what is causing the sex and intimacy problems I'm currently experiencing and that my sex life will get awesome at 30 too. I wasn't aware I had intimacy issues. Ok, so we don't do it very often, but when we do it's great. I'm not lacking confidence in the bedroom - it's the only place I never have lacked confidence! - I'm just freaking tired, a lot. But as most women peak sexually in their 30s, it's pretty safe for him to say that I will too.

Thinking of ages, he told me that after 40 I really need to look after my gyno stuff, keep up with mammograms etc. That too isn't surprising I guess. It's a miracle I've been as luck as I have with my family history. And that family history includes early menopause and lots of cancer. So I'll be on that. Part way through he changed this a little and recommended I see my gyno and get blood work done now as I have a "slight, easy-to-fix imbalance right now". Well I'd due to go in, so whatever. I'll get on it sometime this week.
He reckons unlike more people who hit their peak in their 20s or 30s and then decline, I have already lived the low-point of my life, and like fine wine will just continue to get better with age. Thanks dude, I know I'm awesome

While he was telling me about these blues he told me that right now, I'm not really that happy. Which is a bit, excuse me?, because this past week I've never really been happier. Everything has been pretty bloody awesome in my life recently. Heck, in the past two years. I've had a great run, with only occasional episodes. So it was weird to be told that deep down I'm not happy. He also told me I have goals in my life but no true direction, I live day to day. He said that like it was a bad thing, but I'm taking it as a compliment. If you live too much in the future, I think you waste your life. Besides, you can only do your own piece and then wait for others to make their move... Then he goes on to tell me about meeting my soul mate.

And he described perfectly that stuff in the past when I was dating both the pedophile and Obi. He's like "You'll find yourself filling the gaps in your relationship with your soul mate, trial-running that relationship while keeping the other". "Suddenly there's this person that understands you..." I can't remember everything he said. Perhaps that's why he repeated himself a lot on the key points But yeah he described exactly how I felt meeting Obi, and that horrible period where I had them both and then he tells me "And this soul mate you will also meet when you are 30"

Wait, uhm, WHAT?