Today, once again, I learned I should be cursing my trusting nature, not because of my SO but because of a guy at work.

I work in a place where people are gossip mongers and two-faced idiots who smile into your face and throw shit at you behind your back. Because of the depression I suffered in past, social interaction issues and the fact I am a bit of an airhead and a troublemagnet I am not liked there.

I found five people I thought I could trust. Gradualy I learned that each of them is exatly the same as others, i ended up with two.

There is an older guy I trusted the most and gave most understanding to (Because he is old pervert, weird, constantly moaning and bitching about how others are gossipy, that others don't do anything, that he could be gone from here if he only wanted... etc) I listened I was nice to him while others were not, i trusted him because he seemed above things like gossiping.


Today I learned he is the first to spread around info about mistakes, laugh at me and talk about me behind my back. It hurt. Because I trusted him and was nice to him.

I am crying and my dear Adam can't really be online today. Right now I am seriously AFRAID and TERRIFIED, even though i know it's only backslash of what happened, that I will be betrayed once again.

I am being reminded why I'm sticking mostly with internet friends and two best friends I have since highschool.