It was simple enough how we met i put myself out there on the internet talking to a gaggle of guys online from my little room in Boise playing my music being myself. Then he showed up.
First, he was a voice a simple companion in my chat with everyone his irish lilt and his sense of humor amazing, then he was a confidant to tell all about my illness. Little did i know he would soon become a lover.
Aidan is his wonderful name, my wonderful wonderful Aidan indeed.
After finally ditching the others for weeks on end we talked every night on skype cam to cam for about 8-10 hours everynight, we loose sleep alot but we wouldnt have it any other way.
two days into knowing me however he found out about my many heart conditions, and also the time limit i've been given on my life originally we agreed that we couldnt let the feelings grow too strong lest i were to pass on too soon
But it was inevitable after a while, we were in love.
Three days after knowing me he bought a ticket, to be clear a $1.5k ticket to see me for a week.
Sept 28th- Oct 5th... i can't wait
We share a love of music its our sweet solace its the sounds that soothe us and he's writing a song for me. Im terrified... i love him and he says the sweetest thinge I.E.
"Despite being as tired as I am, saying goodnight to you still stirs feelings of impending regret. Though I long for the comforts of my bed and the much needed sanctity of sleep, I must force myself away from your heartwarming company with all the willpower I can muster. For now, it's only in my dreams that I can hold you but even my vivid, wild, untamed imagination can do no justice to hearing your enchanting voice with my own ears, or seeing the smile that makes my worries and concerns count for nothing. You, my dearest Taylor, are so very special. My words will fail again and again to capture the essence and majesty of your being, but surely never for lack of trying."
He's a romantic and he's quite a looker much better looking then me...
on to my fears
THE DISTANCE
He is SO incredibly far away how could this ever be long term how could we ever close the distance
MY SICKNESS
6 months left to live is a short time unless i get some pretty miraculous surgery
OTHER
A general fear that i'm nothing more than an easy lay really...i would hate that so much.. i really REALLY would.
I love him i love my Aidan with all my heart
He is my Anam Cara, the beat in my heart, the music in my mind, and the blood in my veins.
What could i do without him? how can i prepare for the worst? and What should i expect?
First, he was a voice a simple companion in my chat with everyone his irish lilt and his sense of humor amazing, then he was a confidant to tell all about my illness. Little did i know he would soon become a lover.
Aidan is his wonderful name, my wonderful wonderful Aidan indeed.
After finally ditching the others for weeks on end we talked every night on skype cam to cam for about 8-10 hours everynight, we loose sleep alot but we wouldnt have it any other way.
two days into knowing me however he found out about my many heart conditions, and also the time limit i've been given on my life originally we agreed that we couldnt let the feelings grow too strong lest i were to pass on too soon
But it was inevitable after a while, we were in love.
Three days after knowing me he bought a ticket, to be clear a $1.5k ticket to see me for a week.
Sept 28th- Oct 5th... i can't wait
We share a love of music its our sweet solace its the sounds that soothe us and he's writing a song for me. Im terrified... i love him and he says the sweetest thinge I.E.
"Despite being as tired as I am, saying goodnight to you still stirs feelings of impending regret. Though I long for the comforts of my bed and the much needed sanctity of sleep, I must force myself away from your heartwarming company with all the willpower I can muster. For now, it's only in my dreams that I can hold you but even my vivid, wild, untamed imagination can do no justice to hearing your enchanting voice with my own ears, or seeing the smile that makes my worries and concerns count for nothing. You, my dearest Taylor, are so very special. My words will fail again and again to capture the essence and majesty of your being, but surely never for lack of trying."
He's a romantic and he's quite a looker much better looking then me...
on to my fears
THE DISTANCE
He is SO incredibly far away how could this ever be long term how could we ever close the distance
MY SICKNESS
6 months left to live is a short time unless i get some pretty miraculous surgery
OTHER
A general fear that i'm nothing more than an easy lay really...i would hate that so much.. i really REALLY would.
I love him i love my Aidan with all my heart
He is my Anam Cara, the beat in my heart, the music in my mind, and the blood in my veins.
What could i do without him? how can i prepare for the worst? and What should i expect?