First off, I just want to say that I really am so thankful that I found LFAD. I have great friends at work who support me, but as none of them are in an LDR i feel that they can only understand me up to a point. They will never know the longing feeling of just wanting to do the simplest things with your SO and not being able to. Thus, I'm very glad to have found this community and am looking forward to having great friends and allies here. 
I met my SO in an online chat. That was the first time I have tried chatting since I was in college and I didn't really have high hopes of meeting anyone special there. I was just looking for someone interesting to talk to. Needless to say we hit it off pretty well, and even I was surprised with how much our relationship has grown. I feel that I can talk to him about anything. He is my best friend and lover. I must say that I easily get bored with people and maybe I'm not the most tolerant of friends. But he keeps me challenged, he keeps me thinking. We have already learned that we do not always have the same views on things (he is a supreme realist and I am an eternal optimist) and our differences only make for more interesting discourse rather than being roadblocks. When I try to describe him or our connection to my friends, I feel that I cannot do it justice. There's this certainty that I feel which I do not have to convince anyone of.
For sure, things are far from perfect. We have a 6-hour time difference and we both have had to exert effort so we could talk daily. I don't even have the best of internet connections, so our conversations were always cut off. Imagine how frustrating that is! Yet he would still be there waiting. We used to talk for 5 hours or more every day. And even with that I still felt bereft at times. I wanted to hold his hands. I wanted to watch a movie with him. To introduce him to my friends and family. I was ticking the days off until I get to be with him. He originally planned to visit me in July.
Then he dropped a bombshell on me last February. He was enlisting for the military as it is required in their country. And he leaves the next day. Imagine the devastation that I felt! It was hard enough just talking to him for only a few hours a day; now we don't even have that. Since then, I am only able to talk to him once a week for a maximum of 2 hours. I feel in limbo. And i know that people would just tell me to keep busy and I have. Still at the back of my mind, the longing never goes away. It's like I'm on autopilot, going to work, laughing with my friends, when the reality is that I'm just biding my time until I get to talk to him again. I don't think that I even have to tell you how difficult it is. I have never been a very patient person to start with. Now, I'm left with no choice but to wait. He's still going to try to visit me, it just has been moved to August. The reason that there's a tiny chance he might not be able to is the cost of crossing continents to be with me. As it is, while he's serving in the military he only gets a measly allowance which is hardly enough to cover the expenses. He tells me to just trust him; that he would try his best to come to me. I hope that you guys can help me attract it so that it manifests. Lol.
In all of this, the saving grace has been my faith. I'm not sure why or how, but I have this unshakable belief that he really is The One for me. I know in this kind of relationship one of the biggest hurdles is Trust. And I am proud to say that he, our relationship, and circumstance have just strengthened that in me even more. I am only human and doubts still visit me from time to time. But I can even go as far as saying that I see my future with him. I couldn't even envision that with my ex boyfriend of 5 years.
I know ours is not the easiest road. Still, despite the distance and limited communication, I BELIEVE. And will continue Believing.
I met my SO in an online chat. That was the first time I have tried chatting since I was in college and I didn't really have high hopes of meeting anyone special there. I was just looking for someone interesting to talk to. Needless to say we hit it off pretty well, and even I was surprised with how much our relationship has grown. I feel that I can talk to him about anything. He is my best friend and lover. I must say that I easily get bored with people and maybe I'm not the most tolerant of friends. But he keeps me challenged, he keeps me thinking. We have already learned that we do not always have the same views on things (he is a supreme realist and I am an eternal optimist) and our differences only make for more interesting discourse rather than being roadblocks. When I try to describe him or our connection to my friends, I feel that I cannot do it justice. There's this certainty that I feel which I do not have to convince anyone of.
For sure, things are far from perfect. We have a 6-hour time difference and we both have had to exert effort so we could talk daily. I don't even have the best of internet connections, so our conversations were always cut off. Imagine how frustrating that is! Yet he would still be there waiting. We used to talk for 5 hours or more every day. And even with that I still felt bereft at times. I wanted to hold his hands. I wanted to watch a movie with him. To introduce him to my friends and family. I was ticking the days off until I get to be with him. He originally planned to visit me in July.
Then he dropped a bombshell on me last February. He was enlisting for the military as it is required in their country. And he leaves the next day. Imagine the devastation that I felt! It was hard enough just talking to him for only a few hours a day; now we don't even have that. Since then, I am only able to talk to him once a week for a maximum of 2 hours. I feel in limbo. And i know that people would just tell me to keep busy and I have. Still at the back of my mind, the longing never goes away. It's like I'm on autopilot, going to work, laughing with my friends, when the reality is that I'm just biding my time until I get to talk to him again. I don't think that I even have to tell you how difficult it is. I have never been a very patient person to start with. Now, I'm left with no choice but to wait. He's still going to try to visit me, it just has been moved to August. The reason that there's a tiny chance he might not be able to is the cost of crossing continents to be with me. As it is, while he's serving in the military he only gets a measly allowance which is hardly enough to cover the expenses. He tells me to just trust him; that he would try his best to come to me. I hope that you guys can help me attract it so that it manifests. Lol.
In all of this, the saving grace has been my faith. I'm not sure why or how, but I have this unshakable belief that he really is The One for me. I know in this kind of relationship one of the biggest hurdles is Trust. And I am proud to say that he, our relationship, and circumstance have just strengthened that in me even more. I am only human and doubts still visit me from time to time. But I can even go as far as saying that I see my future with him. I couldn't even envision that with my ex boyfriend of 5 years.
I know ours is not the easiest road. Still, despite the distance and limited communication, I BELIEVE. And will continue Believing.