My story is beautiful and magic, sad and very very complicated...
We have met in India among hassle and noise of remote Asia two and half years ago. We both were working there for nearly a year. At our first meet at my friends house I thought that he is a little arrogant snobbish British boy and he thought that im another white silly girl who dates indian boy (I did date indian boy, dont ask, i would never do that again on earth!). Next few months we were not meeting but i have been hearing some things about him, mostly about his past travelling and I admired that, I almost wanted to be like him. On some winter night in company of our friends we have met again and I couldnt stop looking at him. We were staying over at our friends place and I kept on staring at his face not being able to stop. So strange! I just felt something really strong that struck me. I was still dating an indian boy and tried not to put attention on my constant thoughts about English boy. He started coming over every week or more, we were always surrounded by friends so never really had chance to have a real talk. I didnt allow myself to think of him like about something more than just a nice boy from book pages, imaginary character. For some reasons i thought that he wouldnt like me, so it was some sort of self-protection, I guess. Our company got smaller and there were usually just us two more friends so there were a chance to find out about each other more, we went on the trips to Himalayas, we spent evenings playing games, cards, talking, drinking and dancing. Once we stayed up all night long, we danced together and he kissed my shoulder, very gently, i could barely notice. I should mention that we were a bit tipsy and really knackered so the bravery might have come from there. At dawn we went for walk when the world was still hazy and sleepy and he took my hand in his pocket and didnt let it go for hours. he was holding it so tight that i was surprised and actually it was hard to figure out what he felt. Later on we made out and those were the sweetest kisses and feelings i ever had though before anything happened I kept my fingers crossed to not let anything happen as I was still in relationship with an indian boy (things were not going well at that time, i obviously wasnt in love with him), the betrayal seemed terrible to me! I would never imagine that I could hurt someone's feelings in such a horrible way! For the next month or so we were falling into each other's arms every time we had chance, only those two friends knew about it and for the rest it was a secret. For the first few weeks we didnt talk much, we couldnt have enough of love making.
I had no idea how things would turn out and where we are heading to but i was falling deeply in love with him. He seemed to have all the features I always wanted to see in man. Our time in India was running out, we had about two months left and I was going to travel south to do a meditation course and he was going to travel with his friend who was coming to India especially to travel with him for a month. I was realising that i wouldnt fit with them, that would be rather strange for his friend and well, for both of us two. Not knowing what to do and fearing not seeing each other, one night i cried and after that I told him that I loved him, because there was no other way to describe my feelings and not calling it love. He was surprised and said that its not that he has fallen in love with me but its too early for such things. I knew that, but i wasnt sure that i would have another chance to tell about my feelings. Next morning after sleepless night he couldnt leave for work, he was coming back to my arms, kissing and hugging me, he said its good to be loved. We have decided to go on 5 days trip before we set for our separate travelling. Those 5 days there were just two of us and we had such a good time together. We were not speaking for about 14 days (my meditation course didnt allow communication), i had 3 weeks of travelling by myself and we were writing long emails about the things we saw and speaking on the phone. We couldnt wait to meet again, we have decided to do an epic Himalayas track for two weeks before I fly home. It was very good... He saw me off in the airport and i had no idea whether i was going to see him again as had no courage to pester him with questions how we are going to continue our relationship. Obviously, none of us knew, i would go back to Ukraine, he would go back to England, end of the story. But... it wasnt!
Thats where long distance relationship began.
My lovely boy went to Nepal for a month after I had left India when he called me from there we had many hours long conversation on skype, we were looking at each other smiling and sweetness was in the air. He flew back home and after 4 or 5 days he flew to my country to see me. Here we could see things from a different perspective. I was not in foreign situation anymore, i was at my country and he still was foreign and felt foreign. We spent another lovely week together and he went back to England. He was working there and I was working here, we were spending hours in skype (we have never done that before with anyone else), dreaming about being together. He came to visit me a few more times in the summer and we have decided that in September he will get a job here and we will move in together.
Part 1
And here is where difficulties began! He got a job which was well paid according to ukrainians but it was nothing if you come back with those money to the UK as exchange rate differs like hell. We paid lots for our flat, so we were not relaxed about money and we have never lived together with anyone, to be honest we havent even been in a serious or long term relationship. Anyway, he was not satisfied with his job (money as well) and me neither, it was long gloomy cold autumn and we seemed to be more miserable than happy. Also he couldnt stay in my country longer than 3 months without crossing the border so another separation was in perspective and we were very anxious about it.
In the end of those 3 months term other things started to pop up, he was saying that moving in together was very abrupt, he doesnt know what he needs to do next, that we have culture differences (there are no proofs of that, as for me its imaginary and ridiculous) anyway, he left and i felt like i have nothing left anymore. Our flat was empty, i couldnt bare being there. After a couple days at home he sent me an email saying that he cant make me wait for him and hope for something and its better to break up etc. To me there was nothing truthful in that bloody email I almost didnt believe in it. I was angry that he didnt dare to tell it to my face and just sent a pathetic email! I talked to him the same night and said that I dont accepted such rubbish and he is a fool to write such things to me. He was shocked, he didnt expect a reaction like that. I was hurt and i felt terrible but I said all i was thinking and after couple of hours he wanted me to be next to him. Even a year after that night i could remember how painful that was. He was staying in England for the next couple of months and I was very bitter with him as it was hard to forgive thing like that. We spoke on skype, we wrote emails and then he decided to take a job in Poland which is quite close to the city where I live.
We have met in India among hassle and noise of remote Asia two and half years ago. We both were working there for nearly a year. At our first meet at my friends house I thought that he is a little arrogant snobbish British boy and he thought that im another white silly girl who dates indian boy (I did date indian boy, dont ask, i would never do that again on earth!). Next few months we were not meeting but i have been hearing some things about him, mostly about his past travelling and I admired that, I almost wanted to be like him. On some winter night in company of our friends we have met again and I couldnt stop looking at him. We were staying over at our friends place and I kept on staring at his face not being able to stop. So strange! I just felt something really strong that struck me. I was still dating an indian boy and tried not to put attention on my constant thoughts about English boy. He started coming over every week or more, we were always surrounded by friends so never really had chance to have a real talk. I didnt allow myself to think of him like about something more than just a nice boy from book pages, imaginary character. For some reasons i thought that he wouldnt like me, so it was some sort of self-protection, I guess. Our company got smaller and there were usually just us two more friends so there were a chance to find out about each other more, we went on the trips to Himalayas, we spent evenings playing games, cards, talking, drinking and dancing. Once we stayed up all night long, we danced together and he kissed my shoulder, very gently, i could barely notice. I should mention that we were a bit tipsy and really knackered so the bravery might have come from there. At dawn we went for walk when the world was still hazy and sleepy and he took my hand in his pocket and didnt let it go for hours. he was holding it so tight that i was surprised and actually it was hard to figure out what he felt. Later on we made out and those were the sweetest kisses and feelings i ever had though before anything happened I kept my fingers crossed to not let anything happen as I was still in relationship with an indian boy (things were not going well at that time, i obviously wasnt in love with him), the betrayal seemed terrible to me! I would never imagine that I could hurt someone's feelings in such a horrible way! For the next month or so we were falling into each other's arms every time we had chance, only those two friends knew about it and for the rest it was a secret. For the first few weeks we didnt talk much, we couldnt have enough of love making.
I had no idea how things would turn out and where we are heading to but i was falling deeply in love with him. He seemed to have all the features I always wanted to see in man. Our time in India was running out, we had about two months left and I was going to travel south to do a meditation course and he was going to travel with his friend who was coming to India especially to travel with him for a month. I was realising that i wouldnt fit with them, that would be rather strange for his friend and well, for both of us two. Not knowing what to do and fearing not seeing each other, one night i cried and after that I told him that I loved him, because there was no other way to describe my feelings and not calling it love. He was surprised and said that its not that he has fallen in love with me but its too early for such things. I knew that, but i wasnt sure that i would have another chance to tell about my feelings. Next morning after sleepless night he couldnt leave for work, he was coming back to my arms, kissing and hugging me, he said its good to be loved. We have decided to go on 5 days trip before we set for our separate travelling. Those 5 days there were just two of us and we had such a good time together. We were not speaking for about 14 days (my meditation course didnt allow communication), i had 3 weeks of travelling by myself and we were writing long emails about the things we saw and speaking on the phone. We couldnt wait to meet again, we have decided to do an epic Himalayas track for two weeks before I fly home. It was very good... He saw me off in the airport and i had no idea whether i was going to see him again as had no courage to pester him with questions how we are going to continue our relationship. Obviously, none of us knew, i would go back to Ukraine, he would go back to England, end of the story. But... it wasnt!
Thats where long distance relationship began.
My lovely boy went to Nepal for a month after I had left India when he called me from there we had many hours long conversation on skype, we were looking at each other smiling and sweetness was in the air. He flew back home and after 4 or 5 days he flew to my country to see me. Here we could see things from a different perspective. I was not in foreign situation anymore, i was at my country and he still was foreign and felt foreign. We spent another lovely week together and he went back to England. He was working there and I was working here, we were spending hours in skype (we have never done that before with anyone else), dreaming about being together. He came to visit me a few more times in the summer and we have decided that in September he will get a job here and we will move in together.
Part 1
And here is where difficulties began! He got a job which was well paid according to ukrainians but it was nothing if you come back with those money to the UK as exchange rate differs like hell. We paid lots for our flat, so we were not relaxed about money and we have never lived together with anyone, to be honest we havent even been in a serious or long term relationship. Anyway, he was not satisfied with his job (money as well) and me neither, it was long gloomy cold autumn and we seemed to be more miserable than happy. Also he couldnt stay in my country longer than 3 months without crossing the border so another separation was in perspective and we were very anxious about it.
In the end of those 3 months term other things started to pop up, he was saying that moving in together was very abrupt, he doesnt know what he needs to do next, that we have culture differences (there are no proofs of that, as for me its imaginary and ridiculous) anyway, he left and i felt like i have nothing left anymore. Our flat was empty, i couldnt bare being there. After a couple days at home he sent me an email saying that he cant make me wait for him and hope for something and its better to break up etc. To me there was nothing truthful in that bloody email I almost didnt believe in it. I was angry that he didnt dare to tell it to my face and just sent a pathetic email! I talked to him the same night and said that I dont accepted such rubbish and he is a fool to write such things to me. He was shocked, he didnt expect a reaction like that. I was hurt and i felt terrible but I said all i was thinking and after couple of hours he wanted me to be next to him. Even a year after that night i could remember how painful that was. He was staying in England for the next couple of months and I was very bitter with him as it was hard to forgive thing like that. We spoke on skype, we wrote emails and then he decided to take a job in Poland which is quite close to the city where I live.
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