Not like anyone cares but I figured I'd just update people who pay attention to my blog here as to how I'm doing and why I haven't been mega active.
First off I'm still in therapy, promptly getting chewed out every day that I have something sarcastic/less than good news to say because "sarcasm is hurtful" and the therapist is of the mind the fact I nearly stabbed someone for giving me two anxiety attacks in the span of an hour links, somehow, to my supposed anger at my father. People need to learn that me not forgiving him doesn't equal me seething about it every hour of the day.
Been job hunting, I have a prospective one. The assistant manager for the Barnes & Noble by my house said he'd call for an interview next week, I'd love to work there. In the meantime I'm just filling out applications wherever I can get them and know I'd show up for work every day. My mom thinks it's to raise money for a car, I'm not telling her it's to move, not until I have the funds to do so. I don't mean I'm gonna pack up in the dead of the night and go "by the way.." I just don't want to say anything should this fall through. She lords my failures to see him over me.
Also I have a sinus infection again.
Now, as for why I haven't been active. I'm on here every day for lots of hours, but I barely post outside the RambleOn! forum section because I'm finding my opinion on certain touchy subjects is pissing people off to where I'm earning a good deal more enemies than friends here now. Which I guess is another reason to be glad that neg rep thing's gone, I'd probably have zilch rep points by now. And really you guys it's not that I'm trying to be mean or I'm having a bad day, I'm just horribly blunt and yes I am opinionated but so is everyone else here to a degree. If I say something you don't want to hear, it's because I think it needs saying. Don't like it, for the love of God ignore my post or PM me and give me a reaming there. Anyway, long story short is I feel less than welcome here now so I've retreated as far back as I can while still staying because I honestly like it here, I like a lot of the people here, I just A) have nothing to report from my relationship anymore, and B) can't participate in lots of threads because they're not things I've done (like meet/kiss/whatever my SO) and I'm afraid of offending people now.
Also, if anyone has a question they wanna ask, LDR-related or no, feel free to ask in a comment. I know like a handful of folks always have inquiries for me.
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LadyMarchHare started a blog post Random update of thingsRandom update of things
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Sometimes I get tired of people ignoring the obvious and I realize I don't always point it out in the gentlest way, but sometimes you need to be blunt and straight to the point for them to even halfway get it. If your SO's treating you like shit, either kick the crap out of them verbally or leave them, you know? Don't blame distance or anything else, you're enabling the abuse. Plus I get tired of all the insanely jealous people. I'm probably more insecure than half the people who say they are yet I'm fine if he goes to a bar or doesn't talk to me every day. I don't need to be the center of the universe, why should anyone else?
And yeah, I haven't pressed the issue since. I figure so long as he's got that job and the hours he could use the excuse for 5 minutes of peace and some form of stress relief. Better than him getting drunk. I think really even if we were CD things would be the same since we'd obviously be keeping different schedules. It's nothing hard work, determination, and a good few paychecks won't fix.