When he said there was never anything to give up in the first place because there never was anything there, that upset me. So for the next few days until he finally replied again yesterday morning we had a long talk I mentioned all the things he potentially gave up with me. I'm so glad he doesn't freak out when I mentioned having kids when we're ready for them -- that was the comment that got him talking to me again. I told him I haven't found any guy I have wanted to be my future children's father yet and that when the day comes, I want him to be the dad and that he is the most sincere guy I have met I would like him to be the father that our future kids look up to. With the right person, talking about kids soon won't freak someone out. That's what brought us to talking again. I kept giving him motivational speeches about long distance that I don't know why before he responded to me, I was on cloud 9 with so much hope for us.

Also, I think it's good to mention whether or not someone wants kids soon. I mean, obviously not within the first month or two, but after some time, yeah. I wouldn't want my time to be wasted with someone if I found out after so many months that he doesn't want children when I do want them someday when we're ready for them. I don't want any now obviously and I'm fine with not having any right now. I wouldn't be able to take care of them with my current situation.

He was pretty upset with me, too about the time thing. He says he doesn't know why I think he has all the free time in the world to always talk to me and I got angry and sad. When I saw him tweeting other girls he sees in person he could have been tweeting and talking to me, but I didn't mention that. I was just finally happy we're sort of talking again. Hopefully in the summer he will have more time to talk. As long as those girls are just friends, and he has confirmed that he doesn't like anyone else that I need to stop imagining that he is.

I've been trying to do this thing where I take one day at a time and I don't look ahead too much into the future because that has been really stressing me out when I did freaking out about not being able to pay rent. I kept thinking life will work itself out, life will work itself out and THEN the staffing company called me two days ago!

Before the staffing company called, I was promising myself never to work for another factory, unless someone can give me a solid 40 hour work week! This new company has a solid 40 hour work week for at least until August. *crosses fingers*

Please let my 28-years of misery be over and only happiness ahead!