Anyway. Back to the one thing from Saturday morning. I initially mentioned this to my mom and suggested that Nix escort her to her seat. She did her typical "pouty face" and said she didn't want it and "It's always been the plan that I walk you down with Dad". Um.... what? Since when? I told her that it hasn't ever been my plan that she walks down with me. Ever. But now my mom AND my sister are saying this. Part of me seriously feels like they talked before I got there and planned to conspire against me on this so Mom gets what she wants. I don't want my mom to walk me down the aisle. I have never pictured it. At least, not in my memory. Sure, maybe I did when I was a little kid. But seriously? You can't hold on to something like that for 18+ years. Apparently she has, though, if I did, in fact, say that she would. I hate this situation. I hate this dilemma they have put me in.
If I put my foot down and stick with "no", I'm afraid my mom (and my sister) will be mad at me and try and ruin things for me. If I give in and say "yes", I'm afraid that my mom will cling to me the whole way down the aisle and then not let me go at the end of it. I'm also afraid that she and my sister will try harder to get things the way they want if I give in on this. One of my sister's "points" was she doesn't remember who walked her friend down the aisle when she got married a few months ago. Great, but I don't care what my guests remember about the ceremony. Sorry if you think I'm being selfish on this, but you're the one who keeps saying "This day is all about you" and I keep saying, "No, actually, it's about me AND Nix."
What really gets to me is how my sister keeps saying "you're having a traditional wedding". Fine. If our wedding is so "traditional" WHY THE HELL are you even SUGGESTING that Mom walks down the aisle with me?! That's not traditional AT ALL. I wish I could say "screw it I'm walking down the aisle alone" but I can't. I know I would regret not walking down the aisle with my dad. I am upset now even just briefly thinking about it. It's non-negotiable for me. Dad WILL walk me down the aisle - I would be absolutely heartbroken if he didn't. As for my mom? No. I don't want her to. If I'm having a "traditional wedding" that's "all about me", why the hell would I want my mom, who is going to be wearing a red dress, to walk me down the aisle? I mean, wouldn't that detract from "my glory"?
Oh here's another little rant. My sister told me that she doesn't want to do my makeup. Okay, no worries. Plenty of time to find a makeup artist. Thanks for the heads up. So I mentioned I may have found a salon where we can get our hair down, his mom recommended it. (It's where she gets her hair cut.) "No offense, but she has a "Mom-style"." Uh.... yea... she IS a mom... "I don't want to get my hair done at a place where they do "Mom-styles" Well, I haven't even talked to them yet, or looked at any other places, so I have no idea what they are like. All I know is she recommended them. My sister went on and on about how she doesn't want to get her hair done there because his mom gets her hair done there. WTF, sister?????
I'm going to talk to them anyway. Since apparently this is a big deal, I will say to her & my bridesmaid: "This is where and when I'm getting my hair and makeup done. I've told them to expect you as well, but you need to call and confirm your appointments and options and stuff."Because if my sister is putting up this much of a stink about it, I'm sure as hell not paying for your hair and makeup. And I was planning on it. Nope. Not any more. You want to go somewhere else? Fine by me.
I'm going to FaceTime Mom tonight and talk to her about this. I am really leaning towards putting my foot down on the matter. I obviously want her to be happy, and I hate that I will most likely end up making her mad at me, but why? Why is this such a big deal to her? Why is she so sad about it? What else could I do to make her feel included? (These are all questions I'm going to ask her tonight...) Send good thoughts my way, please... I'm going to need them. This issue alone is what is making me seriously reconsider eloping. Not to mention that my sister thinks I need to completely re-word the invitations..... No. Mom and Nix and I have had this argument for so long... No. It's decided. I'll adjust the RSVP wording, because I agree. It's not 500% clear which one says "no, I'm not coming". I'll do that. But otherwise, no. Your reasoning is complete crap, and since when are the bride & groom names NOT in a larger cursive font in the middle of the invitation?!
On the bright side to all of this, I'm going to see Iron Man 3 on Friday with my tumblr soul mate, and the only person I follow who I also know IRL. Seriously, though, our tumblrs are pretty much the same (with the exclusion of Dr Who). And, according to some mutual friends, we "even laugh the same". I'm happy about that. Less than happy because I won't get to talk to Nix until maybe Saturday now, but... our schedules are seriously the least compatible things ever. We spent an hour and a half on the phone last night, though, which was really good.
I think this is the longest blog I have ever written on here. But I don't think it's going to yell at me to break it into parts.... we shall see!
Oh. Man. I totally have to split this sucker into two parts. Sweet!
See this is the part of weddings I hate, people are petty and need to just shut the hell up. Like, really.
I don't know how long your aisle is, but if you need a compromise, I've known people to have one parent walk them part way and the other to walk the rest. Another thing I've seen is that the bride gives her bouquet to the mum to hold rather than the MOH. I dunno, just ideas.
I wish you the very best of luck with it.