When I'm at home (which is most of the time, these days), I've started to feel kind of like furniture--only noticed when someone needs to use it. I used to be able to just sit and talk to my mom, or at least do things at the same time as her and talk to her then, but even though she'll make time to talk to me about things on her mind, it's usually the case that as soon as I start talking about me, something else is more pressing and she'll either start talking right over me, at someone else, or interrupt me saying she has things to do. And one of the things I'd most love to talk about is the one thing I know I can't, because I know she'll freak out and give me crap and a lecture and I just don't want to deal with it.

I am a big Doctor Who fan, even though I'm still pretty new (I started watching it basically at the beginning of January, although I have watched everything on Netflix that's come out since 2005), and it didn't take me long to start incorporating it into my dreams. XD I don't usually remember my dreams, but dreams that have a lot of emotion attached to them and that are very vivid, I have no problem with. I can remember certain dreams I had when I was as young as 4 years old, even today. Anyway, so the other night I had a dream that was Doctor Who themed, that kind of expressed how I've felt lately. I suppose I didn't need to mention it was Doctor Who related, since I don't want to give any spoilers in case someone out there hasn't gotten as far as I have and doesn't want to know what happens until they watch it.... Basically, I dreamed I was one of the characters, related to some others (although I still had my name and not theirs, which was strange), and I saw the people I was related to on a couple of different occasions, and each time, they took a moment to recognize me and remember who I was, and it was troubling. (this theme kind of actually reminds me of Fuko Ibuki from Clannad, for those who may be familiar with it) And then, several times, I was trying to say something to the Doctor (dunno what), and he just...ignored me. Every time. Didn't forget who I was or that I existed, just wouldn't listen to me, no matter what.

The sad thing was, I was upset about something like that at dinner last night, and I tried to tell my parents about the dream and my mom interrupted me and told me I'd told her a few days ago, which was dumb because I'd just had the dream the night before and hadn't told anyone yet, and then my dad and sister, who were the only other ones at the dinner table and who'd been involved in conversation before, started talking over me.... I dunno. I've also gotten chewed out for things I didn't do, and told to stop doing something by one person who then proceeds to start doing the same thing I was just doing that was apparently not a good thing.


ANYway, so I've felt like my family's forgetting about me or something, or that they just don't care.....

BUT, here comes the looking on the bright side thing. Other people have been paying attention to me, and being nice and stuff. Actually, Michael, my friend/hopefully-someday-SO, did something pretty nice on Saturday. I'd kind of been wanting to see if we could watch a movie or TV show together sometime, and he was always too busy, but he had time on Saturday so he said we could give it a shot. It didn't actually work, due to technical issues, but I think it was a good 2.5 hours that he let me try various things and mess with stuff to try and get it to work. Normally, he's kind of hard to pin down and after a little bit he'd normally say he had other things to do and take off, or at least that there was no longer enough time to watch the episode of DW I'd picked out. He's also kind of anti-Skype, and he actually downloaded it and created an account just so we could try and watch something together. And he postponed all that stuff he normally does, too, while I tried to figure it out.

That made my day, honestly, even though it bugged me that we didn't watch anything. I was so happy that there ARE people who care, obviously, even when it seems like other people don't.