But seriously, you don't want to hear me moan, please look away.

So things are good, actually. I've got dinner in the oven, my house is nearly clean for the inspection tomorrow, BIL to baby-sit house for inspection tomorrow. Interview with a midwife on Friday morning. It's good. My life is good.

Oh and tonight I got a good long chat with my mate who is one of few people to be able to be genuinely happy for me, even though I know she's a bit jealous that she's not yet at the same stage of her life as I am (and in all fairness, she's 3 or 4 years younger, and getting teritary education, so she's not really "behind" she just has that illusion). She always asks me about the pregnancy first, she gives good solid advice (it's got to do with her study) but isn't pushy. All round, she's great and I'm so happy to have her right now.

I notice that some of my other mates, are.. not so supportive? Like, one of them loves kids - absolutly gung-ho about kids - always telling me stories about her God daughter and shit that she knows I don't care about (whom I've never met, and likely never will) and I listen (granted, I don't always look at the photos/videos, but I'm honest when I don't) and yet if I mention anything about the baby I'm brewing I get an "oh that's nice" or a happy face and then she changes the subject. So, I'm learning not to bother her with my boring life stuff. But yeah, feel a bit alone. I don't want to bother my friends you know.

Anyway, the real reason I'm here to complain, is that one specific person who's very important to me, just made me feel like crap. And, I knew she would, as soon as she found out that I want a home birth I knew there'd be an issue, because I know her feelings on it.

Now, research tells me that for a regular-low-risk first time pregnancy a home birth is equally as safe/dangerous as a hospital birth, and for a second time regular low risk pregnancy it's actually safer than hospital birth. And I'm not one of those crazies who's doing it unassisted with hypnotheripy or any of that. I'm not going in blind, I really strongly feel this is right for me and my baby, and one of NSW's best hosptials is a ten minute drive from here if something does go wrong. I might go against the norms here and there, but I'm not a moron, basically.

Anyway, she reminds me of my family history, and yes, I have always been much luckier than the other women in my family, I suppose I can't expect that to last. I know we have a family history with a lot of breech births, my mum was born blue, etc etc. I will talk to my midwife about all these things, I will make sure it's as safe as possible for me to do this.

But like... I really felt she was a bit rude!!

It's a big decision to make. I know I have a lot of big decisions coming up. It took a bit of effort to convince Obi to let me do this too... I dunno.

Maybe I am as stupid as people would have me believe and I just don't see it? But for today my friends, please don't tell me about it...