I'm sure after ten minutes and a bit of blogging, I won't be the rage demon anymore. Babies can sure test you. There's something new and infuriating every day. Like, I think three days ago now, she decided that instead of crying when she doesn't want to eat something, or turning her head away, she'd just refuse to swallow. She keeps opening her mouth for more food, and at first you don't see what's hidden within, until there is a moat of multi-coloured baby mush making a lake behind her bottom teeth. Which she's happy to show you during a proud open-mouthed smile. Then, as the minutes tick by it flows down over her chin, or if I'm really lucky she'll sit forward and let it spluge onto the carpet. Or she'll get so distressed because her full mouth is making her gag that she'll cry, still open mouthed, until I scoop it all back out with the spoon.
WHY??? WHYYYYYYY?!?!! I liked the system we had before. But, I know, this too shall pass. There's this whole love/hate thing revolving around food/breastfeeding/drinking with this kid, and I suspect that isn't going to get better as the years roll on.
In other news, my house is nice and tidy. Excepting for the kitchen, but we're having dinner at Bec's, so when I do clean it I know it will stay that way for more than three hours. It's the small victories.
Obi and I seem to have settled into a nice pattern of not pissing each other off, and that's good too. It can be hard, being in the same space constantly and him dealing with unemployment stress, not to bicker about petty shit and get under each other's skins, but so far so good.
Yesterday, I finally went on a play date with that nice chick upstairs who I mentioned wanting to be friends with. Anyway, man I was a mess leading up to that. For me it is far easier to have to be social with strangers than acquaintances. I don't care what strangers think of me, and I'm alright making conversation, but this chick? She lives in my building. I see her all the time. So if she decides I'm an idiot or I somehow offend her, or I embarrass the crap out of myself, I still have to see her all the time.
We were having a picnic, but by the time yesterday rolled around there was very little supplies left in the house I could contribute. I mean we have food for the meal plan, which is mostly a bunch of different soups and pasta bakes, but we don't have lunch food, things to make sandwiches or any of that, and I simply couldn't justify going out and buying stuff. Luckily I had soft drinks and cookies I baked the other day, so I could contribute something.
But despite my anxiety and lack of preparation, it was really good. I had a lot of fun, we laughed a lot, and Isis was a dream child the whole time, even though she missed her nap. I was super proud of her. I'm hoping we can hang out again soon, and it will be less awkward as time goes on.
I finally have an idea for Mlle's photo competition, so I'll be cracking on that in the next day or so too. (Yes I know I can't win a prize, but let's face it I don't have half the skills everyone else seems to have, so that's not likely to matter.)
I got another negative test yesterday and was super bummed about it. I don't know if maybe I should go on the pill for a couple of months to sort my cycle out or if I should just keep waiting, trying and hoping. I guess I'll decide when my period shows up next, whenever that is. My phone's period tracker tells me that might be September though, and likely I'll have cracked a shit at this and decided to do something well before then. The pill might be ok. I mean, I don't really want a Gemini baby anyway.
GYM! I love the gym. Bec will be off work in a couple hours and then we're going to do a massive cardio workout followed by an hour of yoga. I'm so pumped. And tomorrow there's my favourite class, I'm starting to think of it as "spirit yoga" because I just feel so connected to the Goddess when I do it. Now, I just have to keep up my visits up while Bec is in NZ so I don't get all soggy and slow. Feel free to message me with motivation.
Ok, going to go do something useful now.
I wonder what Tanja's up to?
Dziu, No. I don't have the right kind of thermometer for that
Hahaha Moon & Lyons, you're forgiven. I personally hate "Mom" or "Mommy" I can hear my mum's voice going "We're not American!" every time.
Bluejay, I haven't. But I've done yoga outside in summer, and that's about the same. Personally I want to try the vibrating-floor yoga. Or Laughing yoga.
My charts were pretty useful from the first cycle.
Anyway good luck with it. I'm sure you're going to have baby#2 soon. After all, you didn't have to wait much for Isis either.
That being said, I do understand you feeling like it may be better to just prevent it for awhile than deal with the guessing game. Maybe by the time you came off them, your body would be ready to function normally