My second batch of yogurt was so amazing, we ate it all in one day - excepting for a portion I'd kept aside to use as a starter for a new batch. Apparently you can do that up to ten times - take a spoonful of your old yogurt to make another liter of new yogurt. Well I guess I didn't have enough because it came out runny as shit. So I turned it into crepes for dinner. Apparently yogurt can be used to substitute buttermilk. Wish I knew that years ago! So there's my useless fact of the day.
There's something seriously wrong with my hormones. I know you're supposed to "nest" but really I just want to cook things. And that's not like me. I only touch food when I'm moving it into my face, the rest of the time it's someone else's problem. but not lately. I've had a crack at making peanut butter - which was good, but hard to spread. My hand blender wasn't really up to the task even though I put the nuts through a food processor first. It was more successful than not. It was good to have that to give my daughter too. (I would never consider store-bought peanut butter as an option to give a young child, have you read the back of that shit?) But as she's eating her little sandwich I'm thinking "You know what would be awesome? If I made the bread and jam too"
I need my head read. Today I was telling Obi "I kinda wish we were in Canada and I could make jam with your mum or do some canning with your grandparents" and I'm trying to work out if it actually works out cheaper to bake your own bread or not. Sept I don't yet own a bread bag or tin to bake it in. In time...
I almost want to go bake now, except you have to stand to do that and my legs hurt. Maybe after I blog, Obi is out at poker tonight. I hope he wins something, I have to pay rent in two days and I'm dreading it. My limited math skill tells me that we will be ok - even if worst comes to worst and he's out of work another 6 months - I can stretch our savings until I go on maternity leave and then we'll be better off for six months after that. (Because if I qualify for PPL again -and there's no reason I wont so far - the government will pay me minimum wage for a full six months which is a lot more than I'm earning right now). Beyond that I can't see a realistic situation where he was still out of work. We will be OK. I've been poor before - very very poor, to be honest, and though I'm not enjoying this stress I know we will get through it.
I've also been thinking, if it comes down to it, I might convince his dad to pay half his flight to Canada for his sister's wedding. He paid a big chunk of her coming for ours, I don't see why he wouldn't do it for us, especially as it'd be his way of seeing his granddaughter. Well one of them.
Last night when the fetus was kicking the crap out of me I was telling Obi how scared I am of having to birth in the hospital, because he asked me when I'm seeing Sonja (my middie) next and I said I won't make a date with her until I'm sure I can pay her. See, if I back out of wanting a HB I still have to pay for the individual visits she gives me until that point. I've seen her once so far and I reckon she'd waive that fee because we're mates, but if I see her several times she will charge me, and if I remember right it's $300 per visit if you don't pay in the usual HB package. He was very comforting, holding me and telling me that I will birth how and where I want to, no matter where we have to pull the money from to do it. He even came up with options, showing he'd thought about it. I guess that means I have to decide if I think I'm worth it - even when we're in trouble with no security at the end of the tunnel. How much does this mean to me?
A lot. The monitoring you get in hospital frightens me, for a start. No, you may not put your hand in my vagina, thank you, and what was your name again? Oh you think I need a needle in my spine for that? Uhm, no. Didn't you take my blood pressure and listen to the baby half an hour ago? How about you go away and let me dilate in peace?
Mmm many thoughts. But I'm low risk and I have time to stew on it - and I do know I shouldn't worry. I am naturally very lucky and the Goddess is always there when I need her most.I'm getting really over being so rounded. I'm not even fat, my face isn't swollen yet or anything. But every man and his dog has something to say to me about my belly - especially at work. I'm to the point where I have no choice to wear a singlet under my uniform and just leave the bottom three buttons undone (even though it's unbearably hot!) because I can't suck it in enough to do up my shirt anymore. And whilst I have ordered a new uniform, it hasn't come in. Paula, my line manager, did give me the go-ahead to wear the new uniform as soon as I get it rather than waiting until it's official start date for the company, but she also warned me she ordered hers back in November and still hasn't received them, so chances are I won't get them until March anyway. I get everything for the standard "Are you having twins?" joke to "woah! You need to get a new uniform, that's disgusting!" I didn't know what to say to that woman, I never have a snappy comeback when I need it. I come home with my confidence in shreds.
I work tomorrow which is why this is on my mind. It's only three and a half hours - that'll make 6and a half hours work this week unless someone calls in sick. *Shakes head*
Happier thoughts, our Anniversary is coming up! Ok, it's a month away, but I'm thinking of it already. I wonder what awesome thing I can do for Obi to make it special. We got gold class tickets for Christmas, so at the very least we can see a movie and eat a giant sundae! Anyway, I'm open to possible ideas. Something corny that makes an impact is my style.
Boring baby stuff has been on my mind a lot, like What does one need for the second baby? Here's my list:
A place for it to sleep
Awesome double pram of my dreams
Baby wearing wrap
Second car seat
Aaaand a mamaroo bouncer
I know I don't NEED the last one. But I wanted it so bad for Isis, and would have got it, but you couldn't get them in Oz at that stage and I didn't trust that they'd have a built in power converter thingy (some appliances are suitable for 110 - 240 volts, while others are just made for America at 110 and wont work here. Plus the shipping was horrendous) Well, Australia got them six months ago, and there's one at the baby warehouse down the road which is every bit as awesome as I had imagined. With Isis we had a bouncer, and I'd rock it with my foot while I did other things, but with one kid running around and needing attention, it would be so much better to have a chair that takes care of itself.
The second car seat and the pram will be the most expensive, because I won't buy either of these used. Used car seats aren't safe, and the pram? Well I feel like I deserve it after sticking with this 15 year old hand me down POS I've had for the past year.
A place for it to sleep I can get off gumtree or maybe used from a mate and just buy a new mattress. Or, if we're still here in this tiny-arse flat, I could borrow a bassinet off Bec, because I believe she has one. I would never buy one because I'm of the opinion that it's a complete waste of money to buy something that will last less than 6 months when a cot/crib does the same job, but it would be easier to make room for a bassinet in our room than another full size cot. Oh, I will need bedding for it too. We don't have enough.
And I want to give the baby wearing wrap thing a go. I still have the sling the lovely ladies here gave me, and it worked decently for Isis, but it had two major drawbacks 1) it would gradually loosen no matter what I did and 2) She grew really long/tall fast and then because I'm not very wide, I could not longer use it as she'd be hanging out the side of my body and passers by would hit her legs and her feet would get sun burnt. It also never felt safe enough to be truly hands free. So I want to try something like this next time. It'll be winter, so I wont die, and I'll still have freedom to run around and play with Owlie while Simmy sleeps. Hopefully she's like Owlie was and sleeps a lot. I have no delusions that finding time for two will be easy!
If anyone thinks I missed something from my list, do let me know!
I've probably reached the word limit, like usual so I'll shut up instead of going off on a ramble about sewing. I can save that crap for next time.
BUT ANYWAYS. (let's not start health care debate)
Zeph- I'm really surprised you strained it and it was still runny!!! How long did you leave it for? Sometimes I would strain my yogurt and forget to check it. I'd leave it for a few hours and when I finally remembered to stop it'd be so thick almost like cream cheese.
SOMEHOW my mother was able to keep the same midwife during my little brother's birth but you know more than I do.