This will be a medium sized blog. my life as it stands I feel stuck. I dont have a job *need a first job* and Im almost 21 years old. I still live with my parents, whom stress me out at times but I still love them. Im at a community college and feeling like Im going slow as a slug towards my degree. In short IM PISSED OFF in a sense...I mean I wish I was at 4 yr or having a full time job. Moved out being able to pay for bills (which Im scared of thanks to my parents stressing me out about paying for myself), being out there own my own sounds nice but Im also scared of being out there. My mom thinks I need to live by myself for a little while before B moves in "because I need to mature and grow up." Those are her quotes exactly.Now she gets on me about my weight *which on my side my emotions about my weight go up and down but when she nags me about it daily my emotions sky rocket down*. I feel pathetic, my sister says I should be embarrassed to still be living here. I am in a sense but at the same time Im worried that if I move out my parents will move away *they have been talking about going to Florida and we live in WA state*--I got so much going on in my head. I feel exhausted from school I want a break but I need to find work. As it stands I dont even feel like going to a 4 year. My dream now is to work in the Bridal industry at like Davids Bridal or be a wedding photographer.(I love weddings). Anyway, and I also dream of being married to B and having kids.
The only question is when is my life going to start? Seriously though, I feel like Im still in high school mode, and Im an adult. It sucks...