and I'm really liking it, there has been a few changes and due to financial issues I'm not going to be able to visit S in October, I will be saving money with my move in the long run, just an unexpected bill came that needs paying and I hadn't managed to book flights which are now really expensive for the time I was going to go.S stressed herself out and brought on a panic attack the other night, she isn't brilliant at talking about how she feels and is now only giving me one word or one line sentences. I've asked her if she is mad with me and she says no but I can't help feeling she is, I stressed myself out over this but I want to be able to pay my bills off that need doing and be able to save up comfortably so I have enough for a future trip and some money to fall back on if needed.
I would get on a plane tomorrow and visit if I could, she has also told me she may not be able to afford to come visit at Christmas as planned which is fine as I am aiming to visit in January when I have time off, I am more than happy to wait a bit longer till our next visit toget saved up and sorted. I know she will be working most the time but just being together will be nice.
I am skyping with her tonight so we will have to see how it goes, I am just worried she is blaming me for it all even though she says she isn't, I don't want to give up on this relationship just because we have to change our plans sometimes you have to make sacrifices to make things work.