My stop in Guatemala was about 4.5 days (arriving around 7am on the first day and leaving mid-day on the fifth) so not much time at all but at least it was something to break up the 8 month stretch between our April visit and when I go back at Christmas. It was wonderful to see him and his family. Leaving was even harder this time around, for him, as well. We both want the distance to end, don't want to have to say goodbye anymore. A number of obstacles are in the way, though. He is set to finish university in 2016 and I'm just starting a fully funded grad program I can't pass up.
We did have a serious talk about the opportunities for him in the US once he graduates. I mentioned that I don't know what opportunities await him with an engineering degree from Guatemala. It will be hard to be an engineer without a US degree, to the point where he will probably need additional schooling. He doesn't want to repeat a university degree but transferring right now is out of the question because his English level is still elementary. He showed me the English courses he's looking at, planning on taking this year. We decided he'll try for a study visa for next fall (2015) to learn English in the US. At that point, we'll prepare to apply for the fiance visa, for him to come in October/November 2016. I feel we've talked about it so much and I've mentioned it on LFAD and to close friends so frequently, but in my mind, I constantly need to iron out the guidelines we set. Plus, it's helping me hold on because even with a shirt and teddy bear nearly soaked in his deodorant and pictures of him all over my room, computer, and phone, nothing replaces being physically with him. This distance is hard.
I've probably complicated it a bit with the whole cross-country move. It isn't so much the extra 500 miles but the being in a city I've never seen before (as I didn't have the money to visit...J was my priority
) and starting a program with people I've never met nor seen is just a bit scary. I've moved on my own before but it's still hard, I conflicted in liking adventure and impulse but also being a homebody that wants to be close to family and friends. I have none with me right now. I am supremely grateful to my friend who drove with me (using her car) up from Washington, DC. The road trip took a day and wasn't the most amazing but I'm so grateful she stayed to help me go to different stores and set-up house a bit. I rented a bedroom in a house site-unseen but the rent is low and I lucked out in the location and sanity of the roommates/landlord (as far as I can tell). There are two other girls and both seem to keep to themselves, which is wonderful for me right now. I'm not sure I'm up to socializing with people I don't know even if I feel alone.
I am a bit miffed my friend left early this morning (so we were together for the drive day and yesterday). She was supposed to stay the rest of today and leave tomorrow but her aunt asked her to babysit Saturday morning and she said yes. I can't help but feel she made an excuse to just leave because while we're good friends we aren't the type of friends that can really live close-quarters. We tried when I lived in DC but the room situation didn't work out. I am glad she at least was here yesterday though so I didn't have to lug bags upon bags of items on public transportation.
I'm worried to not have my car here. It's not metropolitan Boston, not even in the Boston area and while there is supposed to be buses, I haven't really seen them yet (granted I've been here a day) and it seems most people have cars. Everything seems very spread out and the grocery store that should have everything and is only a half mile from my place is also half on strike so there is no fresh produce or regularly stocked perishable items. The next closest grocer is about 2.5 miles away and about 40 minutes by bus. I'm not used to it but it is possible and at least it'll help get me active since the university gym is also at a different campus than everything I have going at the university.
Speaking of university, one of the required courses I'm enrolled in changed date/time during the week to directly conflict with the elective I chose. At first I was annoyed because the elective is interesting and I'll have to change it but now I'm worried as I've received no response on help with changing my course schedule...there are about 6 elective courses I can choose from that will count for my degree but only the one I was enrolled in will count for my concentration track. I'm not really sure what to do on that as I don't really want to through away an entire course by enrolling in something that won't be applicable to my credit count but I have to have 3 courses to be enrolled full-time or my funding doesn't count.
The funding is yet another worry. My department should have already submitted all the required information since classes start next week but I'm still getting billing notices from the financial aid office and no one in my department has returned an e-mail. Right now, I feel as though I'm losing the gamble of moving across country to attend this program. I have no buffer money in my account to cover bills after September as the funding is to pay for tuition and living expenses/salary and it looks like this is going to take a long while to sort out.
Hopefully today I can get some things clarified when I stop by the university and "drop in" on the department chair and coordinators. I still need word on when/what I will be doing for my work study. I have received an e-mail from the professor I am to TA for, thank goodness. There is no orientation to attend, the department chair is supposedly "planning something" for the first week of semester. I'm just really stressed about what's going to happen in the next few months. I'm stuck between being excited to study again, worried about it not working out, and just wanting December to come so I can go see J, again.