Moving out tips, how to not be so scared about it?

[MissVampyxo]

So the SO was supposed to come here in the next couple of months but sadly i don't know if that will happen. My family has been going through a lot and my mother is just saying she thinks it's best if we just wait and he can sign up for another semester at college and then by summer we'll see what happens.
I'm 17, he's 21 and both of us still live at home. He was and still is welcome to come here by my parents but whenever I think about him actually moving I feel bad for what HE has to go through and I'm also worried if we break up or the stress that might happen here.
If he doesn't end up moving here I of course will have to move there and I just don't know how either of us will do it.
We're kinda like those teens/young adults who SHOULD have everything in there life sorted out... a job, car, home all of that but we don't. It would be so easier if both of us had all of that figured out but we don't, and I kind of feel like maybe I should be with someone else but I love him more than anything and couldn't handle breaking up with him.

Do you think it's best since neither of us are set yet to just wait longer? He is also very afraid of living out on his own and can't even afford to do so yet. Though we both really want to be together already and both parents have offered for the other to come and live there. I just wish he already had a car, a job, and some money saved so he could come here and just buy his own place.. for now I just have a car and I'm graduating a bit early - this June so I don't have my college set up yet.

I just don't know who to ask about anymore because we're both clueless on what to do and I'm just so scared about everything. It's one thing for me or either of us to move out up the street or somewhere in the same city but for us to move ACROSS the US (not technically I'm from Ohio and he's in Florida) It's just a big step for anyone going through it. I think more-so for me because I've never done anything alone, or by myself. I've still never even been on a plane yet!

[Michia]

You're still young! 17 and 21 isn't that old, and if you rush into moving before you're financially stable, it may lead to problems later. I would suggest making a plan for the future, whether it be a two year plan, or a five year plan. Whatever makes you both comfortable. Also, before you decide who moves where...factor in the economic situation in your cities. I would imagine the unemployment rate is a bit higher in Ohio than in Florida - depending on the area. Don't rush into anything just to close the distance. At 17 you still have a lot to figure out - and that is ok!

[kat4301]

I've certainly realized that homesickness can be hard to predict until you face it. However/whenever you decide to close the distance, I think you should go the less stressful situation so that if there is some homesickness its not compounded too much by other things. Time can be hard to endure but we know that our twenty-somethings generation is the big loser in the economic downturn, but at the same time I think I am more succesful with my career and daily work when I am living with my SO, so you kinda have to weigh the pros and cons and just be ready for a little uncertainty and rocky waters as you do transition.

[LoveL]

First of all, you guys are a little young to be assuming that you're supposed to have all of your life sorted out. @ 17, have you even graduated high school yet? There is still a lot of life left to live and you still haven't completely finished your mental mental development and are still figuring out who you are.

As someone with a little more experience, I would advise you guys to wait it out just a little bit longer. If you are concerned about breaking up, then that tells me you aren't ready to take a step as serious as moving him in to live you @ your parents' place. In the meantime, refocus your efforts on making the distance not seem like such an issue and the time apart be shorter. But it sounds like you should work on your relationship a little more before you take such drastic steps as relocating your lives.

And as far as being "ready" to move out, until you take the step and do it, you'll never be ready. This is one of those things that only gets easier after you jump out of the nest and try and fly on your own. It's scary, sure. But he'll have to do it at some point anyway. Maybe he can try living on his own where he is now before he jumps from one parents's house into another.