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trying to close the distance

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    trying to close the distance

    My LDL just left after visiting for two-weeks. He's back in Copenhagen and I already miss him. Its like a part of my heart is gone. Even tho my husband is here, its just not the same. It was so wonderful with "my boys" here. Now to the complication... HOW to get my LDL into the US?! We've discussed several options; student visa (he'd like to continue his education here at one of the colleges) to my divorcing my husband (but not ending the relationship) and marrying my LDL... Has anyone else faced these difficulties? As well... I'm facing some issues with my LDL's family since we're not a 'normal' relationship. We're polyamorous. His family is understanding but... mostly confused why he would want to be with me, I guess. And that scares me. I don't want him to face them giving him a hard time just because of his feelings and wants. Ugh. Too many feels today.

    #2
    Welcome to the forums

    We don't get a lot of polies, so I think it'll be great to have your experience and wisdom floating around.
    I don't think divorcing your DH is the way to go, because besides the added costs of that, you might still have trouble proving that the relationship with your LDL is serious/genuine. I know the states are tricky to get into, and that the visa process is different than to get into Oz, but when I sponsored my SO to come here, I had to prove that I'm no longer in contact with my ex. I needed a stat dec to prove I wasn't seeing both men (because the government isn't really cool with that ... it probably confuses the tax system ). So... obviously because you are seeing both blokes, you couldn't prove you're not unless you lie... and that's just a path no one wants to go down lol.
    So yeah, student visa for the win.

    I think moving to study as well as for love would set his family's mind at ease a bit and it'll give him his own personal goals and focus, which is important to well-being.
    Happily married to the little Canadian boy I never thought I'd meet in person

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