I feel like i'm going to write a bit of a book here, so please bear with me. I want to write EVERYTHING, so everyone can get where i'm coming from. I will appreciate anyone's help or ideas. 
This is my first ever post here.
if you just want to read the short(er) version, just skip to part 2. If you want to read the background story as well, then read part 1 as well. Thanks for your time.
Before i begin, i want to say I'm almost 18, and i've known this beautiful girl (inside and out) since i was 14.. Lets call her Rose. She lives in East-Asia now. Unfortunately, this is because of her parents wanting to send her to a very good boarding school which she lives every day of the week there (apart from Sundays).
[Part 1]
To start off, we began just using email to speak to each other. We started off as friends, but by accident, things just became more than friendship, and eventually we became 'a couple' back in 2010. Things started off really romantically, and we would read each other our own bedtime stories over the phone, and speak for hours about anything, and leaving each other morning texts the morning afterwards. Her mum knew about it, and she was fine about it. Sometimes i would speak to her mum on the phone when Rose came back from school on a Sunday, and she was a bit busy to speak just then. But English is not her native language, so i had to work hard to learn their native language!
Then school started, and she wasn't able to use her phone once she started school, and i began to hear from her less. Maybe about once or twice a week. I felt a bit agitated, and i questioned her about it because i missed her. We got into our first little argument about it (i know it's very petty, but we never had an argument since. We've always been very open and understanding.) At the end, she said that she lost her feelings for me, and would prefer to go back as being friends. She said she was so sorry. I had to accept what she said (what else could i do?!).
That was October 2 years ago.
We continued writing by email occasionally. Maybe about once a week. Until valentines day 2011 a few months later, i wrote her a poem that i still loved her and i would do anything for her. She wrote back saying that she was 'crying like a baby' and was so happy that she was with me again. I thought it was a miracle that she still loved me and i was so happy she said that too. We stayed together for over a year after that. She would send me lots of beautiful little handmade gifts over the post, and she was very romantic and adorable again, even though we couldn't keep in touch regularly when she had school.
[She said that when summer 2013 came, and when we no longer had school (we would both be 18), i am welcome to visit her and stay the whole summer with her.]
[Part 2]
However, by Summer 2012, her feelings again started to wane noticeably. I asked her about it, and she said that she just didn't have those feelings anymore. She said she was sorry, but wanted to be with me still as a friend because i was 'the most important person in her life'. So by then, i would (again like before) remain in touch, hoping that some day, things will be different. She treated me as her best friend the whole summer, and would write paragraphs all about her day whenever she wrote to me. But that was the summer, (and like before) when school began, her contact decreased to only once a month, or more. She was in her last year of school, so she had twice as much work to do than before. She couldn't even be with her friends or parents regularly.
This week, i hadn't heard from her for almost 2 months, so i asked one of her friends if she was alright, she said that she was fine, but had been very busy with her schoolwork. When i heard from her a few days ago, she sent me an email titled 'sorry'. She said it was a while since she had spoken to me,and she was sorry if she had made me worried. She was very busy with a very tight schedule, so she didn't have time for anything but studying.
She said she thought a lot about 'us' and she didn't know where it went wrong, but it wasn't the same again, and she doesn't feel anything. It could be because she was too busy for this. But she said she couldn't do this anymore,and she needed to tell me otherwise she would feel more sorry and guilty. She said she had to move on, and had a thorough and serious thought about it, but she would never forget me. She ended the email with saying it would be best if we didn't talk anymore. She wished me well and said it was time for us to move on.
The last few days had been really weird. Not very depressed, just very numb to everything. But the melancholy of it meant i had the chance to think really hard of what happened. Whether she was right, or not. And after some thinking late at night, i realised that what i truly 'wanted to do', was to win her heart again.
She isn't the kind of girl i could just 'give up' on. I've known and liked many girls before her, but since I've known her, i know the difference between like and love. I don't know how to do it, but i know that i have 3/4 of a year left to think of something, and i hope that is plenty of time. I just have to pray for another miracle. The thing that is on my side is, by the end of this school year (summer 2013), there will be no more school to keep her this busy.
My plan is to surprise her this summer by saving up the money to see her. (as you can see, it'svery basic so far)
I was thinking doing this by either:
1). Visiting her mum first in Rose's home just before she graduates, and hopefully surprise Rose in her home when she arrives back from school following graduation. (This will be courteous towards her mum, acknowledging my feelings towards her daughter and asking her permission to date her. This is a bit of a 'high risk-high reward' situation. If she says yes, then winning Rose's heart should be okay with her mum's approval. But if she says no (which she is well in her rights to say), then it's a bit hopeless. We got along well, but her daughter is her priority of course, and she hasn't got much of a reason to say yes to me.
2). Visiting her outside her school gate on her day of graduation. I hope that the element of surprise will favour me in the hope that the surprise and excitement in just seeing me again and meeting each other will bring the spark back. Again, this is a bit risky, as if this is going to happen, it needs to be as 'un-awkward' as possible. If she is walking home with friends all around her, i can't just walk up to her and say 'hello, here i am. I came 6000 miles for you'. And i can't just jump out from behind her either. ...Oh, i don't know...
The reason why i'm asking this, is because i know she still has feelings for me. Just the embers of what was a fire. But those embers won't go out, because it's only because she 'doesn't believe' that we can be together, and the workload of schoolwork every day means that she hasn't the time to think about us each day, or maintain our relationship. The chances of a relationship between us surviving this year is nil. But i don't care, because i want to be with her in the long-term, and hopefully more than a boyfriend one day. So she's worth the risk i want to take. If i can just make her 'believe' again, with school out of the way this summer, i believe that i will find a way into her heart again. I just have to hope a miracle will happen twice.
So, what can i do to win her heart? Does anyone have any improvements to my ideas, or anything else to say? I know that most people would just let go. But I'm not most people. Especially when there's still a glimmer of hope left.
n.b. If this helps, i have another friend who lives in a neighboring city of hers. She is a girl a few years older than I. She knows about my feelings for this girl, but doesn't know her personally. I will visit her this summer too.
thanks again for your time.
This is my first ever post here.if you just want to read the short(er) version, just skip to part 2. If you want to read the background story as well, then read part 1 as well. Thanks for your time.
Before i begin, i want to say I'm almost 18, and i've known this beautiful girl (inside and out) since i was 14.. Lets call her Rose. She lives in East-Asia now. Unfortunately, this is because of her parents wanting to send her to a very good boarding school which she lives every day of the week there (apart from Sundays).
[Part 1]
To start off, we began just using email to speak to each other. We started off as friends, but by accident, things just became more than friendship, and eventually we became 'a couple' back in 2010. Things started off really romantically, and we would read each other our own bedtime stories over the phone, and speak for hours about anything, and leaving each other morning texts the morning afterwards. Her mum knew about it, and she was fine about it. Sometimes i would speak to her mum on the phone when Rose came back from school on a Sunday, and she was a bit busy to speak just then. But English is not her native language, so i had to work hard to learn their native language!
Then school started, and she wasn't able to use her phone once she started school, and i began to hear from her less. Maybe about once or twice a week. I felt a bit agitated, and i questioned her about it because i missed her. We got into our first little argument about it (i know it's very petty, but we never had an argument since. We've always been very open and understanding.) At the end, she said that she lost her feelings for me, and would prefer to go back as being friends. She said she was so sorry. I had to accept what she said (what else could i do?!).
That was October 2 years ago.
We continued writing by email occasionally. Maybe about once a week. Until valentines day 2011 a few months later, i wrote her a poem that i still loved her and i would do anything for her. She wrote back saying that she was 'crying like a baby' and was so happy that she was with me again. I thought it was a miracle that she still loved me and i was so happy she said that too. We stayed together for over a year after that. She would send me lots of beautiful little handmade gifts over the post, and she was very romantic and adorable again, even though we couldn't keep in touch regularly when she had school.
[She said that when summer 2013 came, and when we no longer had school (we would both be 18), i am welcome to visit her and stay the whole summer with her.]
[Part 2]
However, by Summer 2012, her feelings again started to wane noticeably. I asked her about it, and she said that she just didn't have those feelings anymore. She said she was sorry, but wanted to be with me still as a friend because i was 'the most important person in her life'. So by then, i would (again like before) remain in touch, hoping that some day, things will be different. She treated me as her best friend the whole summer, and would write paragraphs all about her day whenever she wrote to me. But that was the summer, (and like before) when school began, her contact decreased to only once a month, or more. She was in her last year of school, so she had twice as much work to do than before. She couldn't even be with her friends or parents regularly.
This week, i hadn't heard from her for almost 2 months, so i asked one of her friends if she was alright, she said that she was fine, but had been very busy with her schoolwork. When i heard from her a few days ago, she sent me an email titled 'sorry'. She said it was a while since she had spoken to me,and she was sorry if she had made me worried. She was very busy with a very tight schedule, so she didn't have time for anything but studying.
She said she thought a lot about 'us' and she didn't know where it went wrong, but it wasn't the same again, and she doesn't feel anything. It could be because she was too busy for this. But she said she couldn't do this anymore,and she needed to tell me otherwise she would feel more sorry and guilty. She said she had to move on, and had a thorough and serious thought about it, but she would never forget me. She ended the email with saying it would be best if we didn't talk anymore. She wished me well and said it was time for us to move on.
The last few days had been really weird. Not very depressed, just very numb to everything. But the melancholy of it meant i had the chance to think really hard of what happened. Whether she was right, or not. And after some thinking late at night, i realised that what i truly 'wanted to do', was to win her heart again.
She isn't the kind of girl i could just 'give up' on. I've known and liked many girls before her, but since I've known her, i know the difference between like and love. I don't know how to do it, but i know that i have 3/4 of a year left to think of something, and i hope that is plenty of time. I just have to pray for another miracle. The thing that is on my side is, by the end of this school year (summer 2013), there will be no more school to keep her this busy.
My plan is to surprise her this summer by saving up the money to see her. (as you can see, it'svery basic so far)
I was thinking doing this by either:
1). Visiting her mum first in Rose's home just before she graduates, and hopefully surprise Rose in her home when she arrives back from school following graduation. (This will be courteous towards her mum, acknowledging my feelings towards her daughter and asking her permission to date her. This is a bit of a 'high risk-high reward' situation. If she says yes, then winning Rose's heart should be okay with her mum's approval. But if she says no (which she is well in her rights to say), then it's a bit hopeless. We got along well, but her daughter is her priority of course, and she hasn't got much of a reason to say yes to me.
2). Visiting her outside her school gate on her day of graduation. I hope that the element of surprise will favour me in the hope that the surprise and excitement in just seeing me again and meeting each other will bring the spark back. Again, this is a bit risky, as if this is going to happen, it needs to be as 'un-awkward' as possible. If she is walking home with friends all around her, i can't just walk up to her and say 'hello, here i am. I came 6000 miles for you'. And i can't just jump out from behind her either. ...Oh, i don't know...
The reason why i'm asking this, is because i know she still has feelings for me. Just the embers of what was a fire. But those embers won't go out, because it's only because she 'doesn't believe' that we can be together, and the workload of schoolwork every day means that she hasn't the time to think about us each day, or maintain our relationship. The chances of a relationship between us surviving this year is nil. But i don't care, because i want to be with her in the long-term, and hopefully more than a boyfriend one day. So she's worth the risk i want to take. If i can just make her 'believe' again, with school out of the way this summer, i believe that i will find a way into her heart again. I just have to hope a miracle will happen twice.
So, what can i do to win her heart? Does anyone have any improvements to my ideas, or anything else to say? I know that most people would just let go. But I'm not most people. Especially when there's still a glimmer of hope left.
n.b. If this helps, i have another friend who lives in a neighboring city of hers. She is a girl a few years older than I. She knows about my feelings for this girl, but doesn't know her personally. I will visit her this summer too.
thanks again for your time.
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