Hey guys I have a problem, I plan to close the distance this year (November) and both of us are very happy, besides I wanted to go in august but something happened and I wont be able to do that, so I told her about it. Of course she felt a little sad about it, so I asked her what about if she comes to visit me on her vacation and she just said this "I dont think so " and all what she says is the fact that its sooner... this makes me feel awful because we have been in this relatiion ship for 2 years (1 year oficially) and I visited her 3 times (december, august and december again)... I know that she doesnt work or her parents wont allow it so easily but she didnt even try... what should I do? I told her before but didnt go the way I wanted and we didnt talk anymore about this, so what should I do? any advices?
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I dont know what to think about it...
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you're closing the distance in what way?
are you two going to live together? or are you going to move closer to her?
and what won't her parents allow exactly? I don't understand.
cause if they don't allow her to travel to you, how do they allow you to close the distance?
can you be more specific?
either way.... communication is the key.... that's what you should do... and remember... when you talk there is a chance people won't go your way or don't see things like you do.
it's a matter of give and take... maybe that's why she is reacting the way like she does now....
maybe she doesn't like it that you want to make her see things your way....
ever thought of that?
so.... communication.... and lots of love..... that's all you need to do.
good luck!The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
Carl Jung (1875 - 1961)
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I miss having rats, but a) I'm too busy for them and b) my mother wouldn't be on board with it even if I found the sweetest, most perfect pair in the world, so I didn't even talk to her about getting them or even bring up the possibility of having them again. It doesn't mean I wouldn't want rats if the opportunity was there. It doesn't mean I don't miss having them. It means my mother wouldn't be on board with it and she would say "no" before I even finished my question. That's why I didn't ask. I am going to assume that this is the same reason your SO "didn't even try." Your SO doesn't work. Her parents give her a hard time and have disallowed her from going in the past. Sometimes it's better simply not to ask when it's going to cause the same amount of tension and when the answer is going to be the same. I would say in this situation, you need to work on not taking it personally. If you've never been in her position, it can be hard not to, but you have to realise that it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with her situation. If she's entirely reliant on her parents at this point, what choice, really, does she have? I would say try and let this one go and stop taking it personally, because it has nothing to do with you. Understand that she has her own family dynamic, and that the time will probably go a lot faster than you think, since you're closing the distance later in the year.
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