That overwhelming feeling!

[jo28]

I'm 35 days away from finally closing the distance after 2 and a half years. We constantly talked about closing the distance as soon as I finish college and it's finally happening. But lately, I'm getting this huge overwhelming feeling...Sometimes I'm scare that everything will fall apart days before I leave (I forgot to mention that I'll be the one moving to his country), I'm extremely excited -don't get me wrong- but also worried about my parents.

Right now I'm dealing with all the paperwork needed for us to get married and with my last semester of college but I can't stop all the worrying. What to do? What to pack? What will happen?

Anyone in the same position? Or someone that has been through this?

[LadyDaemon]

I think most of us who go through the closing the distance process feel almost all or one of the emotions you're describing. I know I am. I have 57 days to go myself after today,so I'm going through it too. It's understandable to be scared about it. Closing the distance is such a huge step forward with a lot of unknowns. I think the best thing to do is to just think positively about it and keep yourself busy with your school work and family for the time being. Spend as much time as you can with those people you love before you leave and talk to to your SO about it if necessary.

As to what to pack,I couldn't honestly tell you because I'm also trying to figure that one out myself. I think I'm mostly just packing up the necessities plus a little extra in my carry-on and the rest is going in boxes and being stored until I can come back for it. The lucky thing for me though is that I'm moving to the other side of MY country so doing that kind of thing makes it a tad easier. On the front of what will happen,I don't think any of us can really tell you that because all of our experiences differ greatly from each other. Anyway,I hope it all works out for you hon and congratulations on finally closing the distance.

[JoeyBug]

I am in a similar position...we're starting to collect the paperwork and stuff ready to apply for a fiancé visa and yes, sometimes I do get overwhelmed. I have to make sure everything is an original, but that I also have a copy and then send it all over to him and it's stuff like bank statements and I worry what if it goes to someone else? Is there not a safer way for this to be sent?! But it says "original copies only" and then I'm all worried about it.

:hugs: try to think of the big picture, that you're getting married and we'll be together in one place!

[pink elephant]

Take a deep breath.

Spend as much time with your family and friends as you can and visit all the places you love there as much as possible. It won't be goodbye, you're just going away for a while.

I ended up making a list of all the things I wanted to do back home before moving to the UK. I was even so excited that I spent days before my departure trying to think of the first thing I was going to say to my husband when I stepped off the airplane.

(It turned out to be "Hi.")

Relax. Your life is changing but definitely for the better. (But focus on finishing the semester first, then think on what to worry about when you leave!)

Edit: Oh, and don't forget to take as many important documents safely packed with you as you can. You never know when you might need them!

[Mimmi]

Just moving on its own is scary! I moved half a year ago (not to my SO unfortunately) Slovenia to Switzerland and I was terrified! What to take? Do I need a Visa? Am I forgetting/not aware of something terribly important? Will I be lonely there (I didn't know ANYONE here, but I did start studying so making friends turned out to be easy)? Why can't he come with?

At first not seeing my friends&family was tough, but in the end, I got used to it pretty quickly. I can see them on Skype often enough and it's so pleasant to go back home for a visit. I would definitely prefer seeing my SO all the time and friends&family on Skype than other way around!

What I did before moving was that I wrote all my worries and things I have to take care of before I leave on a piece of paper - then I was just ticking them down and gathering my thoughts, focusing on my decision and in the end I survived

And about possessions: moving also means leaving a lot of your things behind. I moved to Switzerland with a few suitcases, but I've already accumulated so many new things that I'm sure I'll have to throw half of them away when I move again. Don't worry too much about what you take, I'm sure your parents will be happy to keep whatever you leave as memory items

I wish you best of luck!

[iHeartt]

Overwhelming is an understatement!! Not just that, I was scared to death (& I'm in my 30's!!!) and all excited at the same time!!
I finally CD with my SO in January of this year. I was beside myself with things to do, things to pack & get rid of, people to see & spend time with, the list goes on an on. I'm a list and a "to do" person. I made my lists, what to do & who to see, and took it day by day. I, too, was worried about my parents. But you know what, it all turned out ok. I had my SO "beside" (ok 5 hours away) me the entire time who reminded me every day just to "relax"! Looking back, would I have done anything different? Nope, everything went just as planned & even smoother.

My advice? Spend time with your friends & family!! New job, busy getting settled, the excitement of finally being CD, etc will get in the way of seeing them again soon!! You can do it & good luck!!

[jo28]

Thank you all for your replies! It's nice to remember that I'm not alone in this and read all your advices! I've been busy trying to finish university so I kinda forgot about this post!

I'm 16 days away from moving and although there are some things left to do, I'm taking it a lot more easier than back then. I finally told my parents when I'm moving (I live with them and we have a difficult relationship) but they took it way better than expected. I'm dealing with the last of my paperwork before I leave so we can get married over there (which we found out that is easier and cheaper!), I already got an appointment with the US Embassy over there. It's nice that things are moving forward and going perfectly. I got to talk to him about my anxiousness and now he's being way more supportive. (back when I posted this it was difficult for us to communicate because he was in Madagascar working). I'm focusing on getting everything done, spend some time with my friends and pack! (my, oh my...how to start that task!? Haha)

[LadyDaemon]

Well I'm glad it's gone well for you. I'm 36 days off at this point myself. I'm slowly starting to pack as I get boxes to do so. It's gonna be a long process over the next month or so. Anyway,I'm glad you got the support of your SO and congratulations on getting married. Good luck with your Embassy appointment and don't be a stranger! Keep updating us.

[jo28]

Well I'm glad it's gone well for you. I'm 36 days off at this point myself. I'm slowly starting to pack as I get boxes to do so. It's gonna be a long process over the next month or so. Anyway,I'm glad you got the support of your SO and congratulations on getting married. Good luck with your Embassy appointment and don't be a stranger! Keep updating us.

Thank you so much! I will keep you all updated, this is one crazy ride!!!


So yesterday it seemed like everything was fine with my parents but now my father tells me that my mother spent the whole night crying because I'm moving. It makes me so frustrated because our relationship has never been perfect and I feel like now she's trying to make up for it. It's not like I'm shutting her out on everything or that I'm planning to but since forever, I have felt (and seen) that we have very different mindsets (not only with her but everyone in my family). It doesn't help that I'm the youngest and the girl. I tried reassuring her, saying that I will try to visit when I can, I will keep in touch with them (whenever I figure out what to do with my cellphone and when we get internet in our house)...but all of the above can be kinda hard considering there are 6 hours of difference and flights from Italy to Puerto Rico aren't exactly cheap. I feel like the whole issue with my family is putting a damper in my mood and to make everything a little more difficult, my SO is out of the country again and we won't be able to communicate as much.

Here goes me, freaking out again! Sorry! Hehee!