Working out where to live

[BlueCat]

I'm after some opinions or any sort of helpful advice or input and just detached 3rd party comments on this one. I'm trying to come up with a way of helping us work out where to live, he's from Florida in the U.S.A, I'm in South Australia. Currently, until end of October when his visa expires, we're both living in Australia.

My current plan has been to write up pros and cons for each area, that aren't emotionally based on family etc. In the past we've talked about living in one place for maybe 5-10 years, then moving to the other place. But honestly, I'm not sure it's that workable unless we had a lot of money, which we don't. And I think it's unfeasible to think like that, maybe more like 15-20 years in one place if I'm completely honest with myself. I mean initially, maybe we will only spend a year in one place only to decide that the one of us who has moved doesn't like it.

Anyway, here's the poor attempt at a list I've come up with so far, would help to have some input as to other things I should be taking into account etc. I feel like the list is currently weighted heavily towards Australia, but I am the one coming up with it so far by myself, so it's hard to think of pros for somewhere I'm not sure I want to live :P

Pros for Australia:
• Already have living capabilities set up – Furniture, plates etc.
• Bec has reliable well-paying job
• Already have a car

Pros for U.S.A:
• Lower cost of living
• Pat could finish up at UF

Cons for Australia:
• Difficult for Pat to finish Wildlife degree if wanted.
• Unsure but marriage VISA possibly costs a little more

Cons for U.S.A:
• Initial cost outlay of getting set up with furniture and finding a place to live
• Cost of buying cars

[kacie]

Have you thought about the job market in each area, will it be easier to find work for both of you in one place. What about if you have children, which area has the better schools or which country would you prefer you child to have an education in, is it better to have a child in one country or the other. What about healthcare, if one of you became ill would you be able to get the healthcare you need better in one country than the other?

Would you be able to wait til after the degree is finished before moving? If he has to go back to the USA anyway?

[pink elephant]

Kacie's spot on with some great points.

Thinking ahead is great, but you're right in that thinking too far ahead - things won't always work out as we expect. In our case we were supposed to live in the US.. but we're in Scotland instead! We would like to try to move back to the USA in the future, but for now we're just seeing how things play along for right now, especially since we just closed the distance last November. I would like to go back to the US, but at the moment I think it would be pointless unless I came back with a masters and some additional qualifications and skills.

Here were some of the questions my SO and I thought about before I moved. I posted these in a previous thread but have edited them to cater to your case:

- Are you willing to go through closing the distance in the United States or Australia? Which visa process is [easier/cheaper/more reasonable]?
- Which country has better job prospects? (as Kacie already highlighted)
- Would either of you be willing to move to a more rural/metropolitan area in your SO's home country for the sake of a job?*
- Which place has more stuff to do?*
- Accessibility and ease of transportation? (Would you be OK without having a car? Or would you be OK with learning to drive in your SO's country?)**
- Could you handle the weather changes and climate? (this one was specifically for the UK.. still adjusting to all the rain!)

Additionally..
- Will your skills and qualifications [transfer/be recognized] in the USA/Australia?
- Will there be a consulate/embassy for the USA/Australia near the area?
- Healthcare (like Kacie said)
- Resources like US/Aussie expat communities in case someone gets homesick?

*My husband's degree requires him to be close to and travel to rural areas while mine is a bit more obscure and involves languages, so my job prospects would be better in a city. I live in a rural area now (as a small city girl it's still something for me to get used to) but fortunately we are within 40 minutes of a metro area.

**For me, this was very important - my interests are rather specific, and I enjoy attending academic lectures, taking classes at community centres/universities, etc. Luckily there are plenty of universities near by and going to other areas is a breeze with a major train station that's also close.

***I would just like to note that I am learning how to drive in the UK with an automatic car right now. Our reasoning for having an automatic was that it would be too much for me to handle learning UK driving rules AND learning to drive manual at the same time. Between my husband and I, we both agree that driving in the US is a breeze, but driving in the UK is an absolute nightmare (even for native Brits!) It's still kinda stressful, but I'm slowly getting the hang of roundabouts..

I think it would also be wise to wait on closing the distance until your SO's degree studies are completed. With such an incredibly competitive job market, a degree will definitely be beneficial in job applications in wherever you both decide to live. Leaving a degree for reasons like moving to another country in the middle of finishing might put up a red flag to potential employers and cause them to think that a candidate may not be dedicated in completing major goals/not be loyal to a company/will leave whenever they want etc. Although it might not be the case for your SO, it may be hard to convince potential employers otherwise.

Good luck! I'd love to hear what you add to your list.. chances are my husband and I will be doing something similar again in the far future.

[BlueCat]

Hey guys, thank you so much for both of your responses, it's given us a lot more to think about and consider, and I'm glad I asked because there's certainly things that I would not have thought of.

The kids thing is really a non-issue for us. Neither of us are kid people, have ever wanted kids or ever see ourselves wanting kids in the foreseeable future. Our pets are our kids, though that's a whole 'nother issue with moving if we end up with pets and want to relocate.

Personally, I would love to be in a rural area, it's like it's built into me. My fiance wouldn't cope with it as well, he says he could handle it, but I know he would struggle without certain conveniences. I have actually forgone applying for several jobs I've been incredibly interested in because of our situation, which is a shame really.

As for his degree, the thing with it is that he's not even sure that he wants to go back and finish it. He's been off from it for a while, so it's not like he's right in the middle and is desperate to go back to it. It would be nice if he finished it, would give him options, but he's not even sure it's what he wants to do anymore, which makes it tricky. Truth be told, job prospects for both of us are probably better in the U.S, but while I don't love my job, I really don't mind not doing something I don't love because I still have him and my hobbies etc.

Ugh, there's just so many things. Thanks again though for your responses.