Possible closing distance temporarily...a bit nervous?

[katiecat08]

My boyfriend told me, he may have to stay down in New Mexico a bit longer than he thought. This means more time away from him and that he won't be able to move here as soon as I wanted. He said he wants me to move there for a few years if he has to stay. Here's the thing, my parents keep saying that there's still the possibility of me moving away for good to New Mexico and up until now, I've kept trying to tell them that it may not happen. It's not the fact that'd I'd be living down there, it's the fact that my family may be right sooner than I thought. He said that we can love back to North Carolina once he is working down there a bit. See not a single member of my family has moved to another state, not one. Every relative I have lives in NC. It would be exciting to see a new place but I'm afraid my family will never speak to me again. I love my boyfriend more than anything and would do anything for him. What would be your advice? My mom said she keeps bringing up the topic of me possibly moving away because she needs to accept it if it does happen.

[Tooki]

Firstly, your family needs to stop being selfish and preventing you from choosing to move out of the state. Secondly, I wouldn't say any more on the topic until you have something concrete to go off of.

Also, you really need to grow up, be an adult and stop feeling like you need to cling onto your family's decisions. If your family REALLY loves you, they will not cut you off over this.

Also see how feasible it is for you to move to NM. Can you find a job in NM? Can your boyfriend support you financially until you find a job?

[katiecat08]

Well nothing is set in stone since he just started his job. But once he's been there a bit longer, he thinks I should live there temporarily until he can move here. Now I'm not going to live with him, I'd find my own place and a job if I can. I know, my boyfriend keeps telling me I'm an adult and that they can't control my decisions forever. I've just never really thought this would come up. I would visit as often as I could and I would keep in touch always. I've just always assumed I wouldn't have to,move there, since he said he'd move here when he can.

[Tooki]

It isn't like you HAVE to move to NM either. Good luck.

[Hollandia]

I agree with Tooki. If you don't really want to go, don't go. I am not looking forward to leaving my country but I love my SO and cannot live without him. You have to decide which priority is most important to you. If I had the ability to move there tomorrow I would. I don't care if we are in USA, Netherlands, or Tibet. I just want to be with him. It is hard to think of leaving the family and friends I have too, but at least you will only be a plane ride away from them.