What challenges have you faced so far, having closed the distance?

[Sammie]

My SO and I are ready to close the distance! But I wanna hear about some of the challenges you guys have faced. (The ones that have already closed the distance)

We've gone to visit each other back and forth several times, each time at least a week long. But what new challenges did you come up against that you didn't think you'd have, or that you didn't already with your visits? And how did you handle them?

[kteire]

We haven't had many challenges, but here they are:

- Differing work schedules. Theoretically we're both meant to work the same hours, but he has a hectic job and can often be there incredibly late (I think 1am is the latest he's been haha) and sometimes he doesn't come home at all if he's out of town on business. This has been a bit hard to get used to, because we were always used to both being off of work when we were visiting. We just try to keep in touch throughout the evening when he's not home, and we'll talk on the phone before I go to bed. Then we make an effort to have some couple time on the weekend following to make up for it!

- Friends. My SO and I both moved when we closed the distance, so neither of us had many friends in London before we got here. My SO knows more people here than I do, so often I feel a bit sad that I don't have many people that I can call up and make plans with out of the blue. He is always sure to include me in plans where possible, and to introduce me to people he meets, especially when his friends are couples!! But we both need our space too, so if either of us has plans without the other, we'll tend to take advantage of an empty flat - like I'll play video games incessantly since I can't hog the TV when he's home!

[Kristin91]

1. We had big problems with keeping our plans. We would make plans together and then the next thing I knew he'd be blowing me off to stay at a club meeting extra long, etc... I think it's because he knew I wasn't going anywhere so he didn't think he had to make it a priority to see me. Things got better though when I confronted him about it and told him I felt like I wasn't a priority in his life.

2. We also had big problems with our sex life that we weren't expecting. Previously anytime either one of us visited we would block off whole days/ a weekend to spend with each other. However, we couldn't do that once we had closed the distance because we still had homework and exams and classes. Because we were so busy it made it hard to find alone time, and when we did we were so exhausted we didn't want to do anything except sleep. This made things stressful for a while, and honestly we're still trying to figure some of this stuff out.

So, my advice:
Communicate with each other, especially as you're adjusting to being CD. Don't let the fact that you're physically close prevent you from talking like you normally would while LD.

Take time for sexy time. It's a huge part of relationships and if you don't make time for it, it might not happen.

[iHeartt]

Our only issue is with our work schedules. When we were LDR, we were off work (one of us at least) and had the evenings to spend together. Now we only have a couple evenings during the week (some weeks, like this one, I saw him Monday & won't see him again till Friday!). We have the weekends though. We are working toward changing things at both our jobs, we just need a little more time there!!
That's our only issue. Advice? Communicate!! We know we can talk to each other about anything it all be ok!

[Zapookie]

Id say the biggest thing for us (or me) was that I guess chores and housework were never discussed prior to living together because I was led to believe shit would get done. Totally not what happened and it really stressed me out, working 11 hours and coming home to mess. It took a lot of talking and bickering on my end for my SO to finally step up and realise that he shares his life with me now and that means not living like a bachelor anymore. Also working so much wore me out and we went from sex everyday to about twice a week and always before I went to sleep. It got really routine and I missed the spontaneity. We're in his hometown for 6 weeks currently and everything is back to normal. But when life gets in the way, you just have to understand that things may change! Life isn't always perfect, that's reality.