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Is it too soon?

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    Is it too soon?

    Hello everyone! So my SO and I have been involved for about 7 and a half months. We recently had our first visit and I stayed with his family for 2 weeks. In our time together he and I have established such a strong connection. It seems almost unreal. We are both young, only 20 years of age, but after my time with him I knew we had such a very special. My SO and I in the time we have been together, have been through a lot. He understands me better than anyone and he loves me for everything I never even knew about myself.
    I know that relationships are work, and that the idea of living with someone is a very big thing. But i feel like there is no one else I would rather go on that journey with.
    After my first visit my SO and i have talked and we both agree that we would love to close the distance and live together. We have discussed the possibilities of relocation and have decided that hopefully by the end of the year or next summer we would like to close the distance permanently.

    I know that this situation is one that my SO and i must navigate together. I am also aware that our decision to close the distance depends on our relationship and our own journey.
    I guess i am merely in search of some opinions on the situation ha. Does it seems a bit too fast to decide after just one visit that my SO and I would like to close the distance?


    #2
    Is it ever too soon to live the life you want to be living?

    Seriously though, too soon for me might be ridiculously slow to someone else, so as long as you put the right amount of planning in and have the money to bail yourself out if the shit hits the fan, go for it!

    Obi and I made our closing the distance plan during our first visit too. Granted, we'd known each other online and been super close more than four years, but we also didn't start dating until the day we met. You're young enough to make mistakes if this is one. Do what makes you happy.
    Happily married to the little Canadian boy I never thought I'd meet in person

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      #3
      If you can realistically make it happen, why not? It seems like plenty of time for more visits, figuring out school, work, flat, and all the rest...
      I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
      - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



      "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

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        #4
        If it makes sense on all levels then why not?
        I am dealing with similar feelings and have almost made up my mind (him and I need to have one more big discussion on it the next time I can speak to him).
        It all depends on what the both of you want and what is realistic as well. If you can both afford it, if you both can continue your own individual journeys while together, if you both love each other enough... who is to say what is too soon?

        Met in July 2006
        Dated very briefly in November 2006
        Reconnected in July 2011
        Something changed in August 2013
        He visited in November 2013
        I traveled in November 2013
        I visit in February 2014

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          #5
          If you want to do this, do it. Follow your gut instinct. Life is short. But, I agree with Zephii - make sure to have a way out.

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            #6
            Ha! I was trying to figure out how to immigrate to be with him before we had even met! So I'd say you're good.


            When we love, it isn't because the person's perfect, it's because we learn to see an imperfect person perfectly.

            True love does not worry about the distance between, for the heart and soul travels through one's words

            When two people are meant for each other, no time is too long, no distance is too far, and no one can ever tear them apart.

            1 universe, 9 planets, 7 continents, 194 countries, 50 states and 10 provinces...and I had the privilege to meet you.

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              #7
              Thank you all so much for your opinions and your advice. I will admit that i am so glad to have my SO in my life even if we must be apart for now. But there is just something about him, something that draws me to him. I feel s if i have known him forever, and that we were meant to be.
              My hope is that he and I can find some possibilities, save our money, continue trying to see one another, and hope fully in the next year or two close this ever annoying distance!

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                #8
                Having a clear goal in mind is important to get through the distance. I'm with everyone else. Have money saved up in case you need to bail yourself out.

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                  #9
                  We haven't met in person yet, but we had a discussion last night about closing the distance. Not a time frame just a would you kinda of conversation? And we aren't "official" yet. Waiting till we met for that.

                  I don't think it is ever to early to think about it. And you are young live life to the fullest

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                    #10
                    Everyone in a LDR aims to one day close the distance so if you can close the distance soon and you're ready for it.. then why not do it??

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                      #11
                      if you have decided to do it by the end of the year then maybe it could be a good idea. by then it would be a little over a year since you two have been together, and a lot can happen between now and December (but hoping for the best of course). During that time, you two can discuss more things in details like about careers, housing, and you will learn more about each other. I have been wih my SO for a year and 3 months now, and I'm still finding out more things about his habits and personality.
                      I think if you want to do it, then go for it, but you have to make sure both of you are in this together and that you two are willing to work hard in making this happen.
                      Good luck!
                      sigpic
                      Met August 2012
                      Official Nov. 18 2012
                      Visited him in Italy August 8 2013
                      He's visiting April 7-28 2014
                      I visited: Aug. 26-Sept. 25 2014

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                        #12
                        I moved in with my so after a little less than a year of us being together. It has gone very well so far, obviously it is a lot different then it was long distance but I thought it would be harder then it actually is. We live really well together and before I would of told you to maybe wait a bit longer but if you really want to then go for it.

                        I don't have the greatest back up plan which I am worried about..I do have one but it would involve be moving in with my mother again and I really do not think I could take that.

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