I know this is probably stupid...

[Parabobomb]

I was planning on closing the distance next May, when she is 16, and old enough to move away from her parents, as per Canadian law. Is that stupid? She doesn't live in the US, so I doubt she would be able to move here... or take school here, or become a legal resident of the US. Is there any way around all of that? Just wondering if any of this is even a good idea. I could support her if she moved down here, I just want her to be able to get an education.

[differentcountries]

Does she get along with her parents? I suppose they will have to give her permission to move abroad. Do you think they will do that?

If you have money, it is probably easier for you to move to close the distance, at least until she is 18.

[Parabobomb]

Her parents would give her permission, yes. Though... I don't think I could live up there for two years. I get horribly homesick, and I don't think I could find a place. I'm just wondering if there would be any way for her to legally move down here alone and finish school... I mean, I dunno. I'd just like to be able to figure that out, whether or not it would work out, depending on laws.

[CanadianGirl]

I was planning on closing the distance next May, when she is 16, and old enough to move away from her parents, as per Canadian law. Is that stupid? She doesn't live in the US, so I doubt she would be able to move here... or take school here, or become a legal resident of the US. Is there any way around all of that? Just wondering if any of this is even a good idea. I could support her if she moved down here, I just want her to be able to get an education.

With her age, she can't really relocate to the US on her own. The only real option is through school and I imagine she's only in grade 11 or so? If she's planning on going to university/college, she can definitely apply to schools in the states and get accepted. If she finds an attractive program nearer to you, there's no harm in applying to see what'll happen. It's important she goes to the right school for her though. International tuition is more expensive, so that's something to keep in mind.

[differentcountries]

She could possability ask for a transfer to a US school. I don't think it should be a problem, though she might pay for schooling unless she is part of an exchange program.

To become a legal resident of the US she must be adult and then deliver an application, following the rules that apply.

[lucybelle]

Yes, it's stupid.

[Parabobomb]

With her age, she can't really relocate to the US on her own. The only real option is through school and I imagine she's only in grade 11 or so? If she's planning on going to university/college, she can definitely apply to schools in the states and get accepted. If she finds an attractive program nearer to you, there's no harm in applying to see what'll happen. It's important she goes to the right school for her though. International tuition is more expensive, so that's something to keep in mind.

So, it would have to be after she graduated highschool? It just hurts being apart considering she doesn't have a phone or computer of her own, so we only talk parts of every day. I know that I'm not acting rationally, but I want her to live with me. I don't know how to make it work, but I want it to work soon, I just have no idea what to do. Yeah, I'm complaining a lot, I apologize. Is there any other ways to get her down here while she's still a minor in school.

[Kristin91]

I think it depends on if she agrees with this, how long you've been dating, and how old you are... just my opinion

[CanadianGirl]

She technically can go to a high school in the US, but, I think it would be exceedingly bad idea. Her senior years at highschool are everything if she's planning on any post-secondary education (internships/college/university). You two haven't met before? Living with a new person, in a new place, in a relationship at a young age is just a recipe for disaster when it comes to focusing in school. I think you need to focus on enjoying being with her while being apart for now.

[Parabobomb]

I am 18 years old, she is turning 16 this year... if that helps. She wants to do this even moreso than I do.

She was planning on schooling in the states as well. I don't think she was planning on going to college, though. Would it be illegal for her to live with me, though?

[Ejoriah]

You want a 16 year old to move away from her parents and with a lover? The only way this would be ok is if her family situation was not good. Unless there is a massive cultural difference that I am not aware of, 16 is just so young. How old are you anyway?

EDIT: just saw your past reply. Honestly how do you think you're going to move to Canada? Do you need a visa/work permit? Visa cost? Why do you need to live with her? Can't you live in her town and date short distance without having her live with you?

EDIT 2: As an international student in the US I am paying sometimes 5x as much as a US citizen for schooling. Where is that money going to come from?

[CanadianGirl]

I understand you both really want to, but to be frank, it would be a mistake both for right now and if you hope to have a future with her.

[squeeker]

My advice is to wait until at least she's graduated.. and she can look into universities/colleges in the USA, and try and get one.. though like CanadianGirl said, international tuition is much more expensive. So keep an open mind and stay long distance until you know you have more than enough money to provide for each other.

I know being apart from the one you love is tough. We all on this site know that, no matter how far apart we are. But if you love her, you will be able to wait and close the distance the proper way. If you try and rush things and take her away from her high school to a US high school where she might start having troubles.. especially if she likes her high school and has friends there and the new one might have mean cliques in and she might not fit in.. and moving is stressful. Don't expect it to be rosy and smooth. I feel like you two are really young and may also have a really young relationship, so I just want you to be careful and not rush things. Rushing things is the worst thing you can do. Taking things smooth and slowly is better for the long term, and having a more stable future.

Good luck.

[Parabobomb]

Thank everyone for the advice. Thank you all. I will wait for her to graduate, and visit her periodically instead. Thank you all very much, no matter how much it hurts.

Edit: She does, however, have problems with her parents, so she DOES want to move out as soon as she possibly can, though. I understand the complications, though.

[dglynn77]

I'm not understanding here… She is 15 going on 16? Or does next May mean THIS year she is 14 going on 15?
Anyways, I feel it is rather selfish to make her move, all alone, at such a young age, just because you would get homesick. EVERYONE gets homesick. Why must she be the one to move, being expected to not feel homesick and give it all up for you at 16???