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Depression over last stages and sacrifices

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    #16
    What? I read this a couple of times and it still makes no sense (and I am a lawyer). Your residence is not established by how many days you stayed somewhere, unless we are talking about taxes, but what does that have to do with selling a house? They cannot say you were legally resident in the NL or wherever if you stayed there under 3 months. Get on the phone with the lawyer and tell them to go back to first year of law-school!

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      #17
      Originally posted by OperaDiva View Post
      What? I read this a couple of times and it still makes no sense (and I am a lawyer). Your residence is not established by how many days you stayed somewhere, unless we are talking about taxes, but what does that have to do with selling a house? They cannot say you were legally resident in the NL or wherever if you stayed there under 3 months. Get on the phone with the lawyer and tell them to go back to first year of law-school!
      It was his stupid paralegal and yes, I have sent an email and this mess will need to be cleared up ASAP. My Ex is even pissed about it when I explained it would invalidate the papers if there was any untruth on the document. I hope to get this cleared up in a few days. I am also wondering if she just assumed I was in NL for that long but this paralegal has fraked up 5 other facts on the papers, and quite frankly I think she is an imbecile. She even got the state of the house wrong the first time, she misspelled the name of the town too. I would laugh, if that was not so sad.

      OH and..ah....sorry about the whole lawyers suck thing...
      *pulls foot out of mouth*
      Last edited by Hollandia; August 24, 2014, 01:26 PM.
      "Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment. "
      Benjamin Franklin

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        #18
        Hehe no worries, vent away. If I were you I would get the lawyer on the phone first thing on Monday and explain to them exactly what the paralegal screwed up (including the pervious times she did, if you can remember it exactly). Be very cool and logical, have details ready and just tell them the exact consequence of the mistake. I find people react better and faster when you get them on the phone, especially people like lawyers.

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          #19
          Originally posted by OperaDiva View Post
          Hehe no worries, vent away. If I were you I would get the lawyer on the phone first thing on Monday and explain to them exactly what the paralegal screwed up (including the pervious times she did, if you can remember it exactly). Be very cool and logical, have details ready and just tell them the exact consequence of the mistake. I find people react better and faster when you get them on the phone, especially people like lawyers.
          I am a type A personality so I have all the details she did wrong saved on my computer. I mostly need to make sure they adjust the "residence" address and remove it from any legal documents they have in office. I would indeed sue them from the money from the sale of my house if they messed up my immigration papers. I also can play cool, but for now, my Ex retained him so I agreed to give him a few days to rectify it.

          I am also going to book my trip to Belfast since there is no reason to stay in NL because I don't legally reside here and unless their consulate can handle this before I leave, I will deal with it in US Consulate in Belfast.
          "Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment. "
          Benjamin Franklin

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            #20
            I've felt completely removed of my former self at times. I've always been shy and kind-hearted, but due to my experiences in life I had to harden up for survival. Before I met DN, I learned to close emotions off instead of go through feeling them. I developed a wild and resilient personality. Prepared for survival and anything else that comes my way. It had to happen or I would have lost my mind long ago. I consider it part of my human growth. It feels that at times, I can't be that person. Sometimes I believe it's because there's no need to be afraid and I'm just learning to be vulnerable - it can be uncomfortable. Other times, it seems like I'm going through a whirlwind of change while he remains the same. I have to stop thinking this way, though. He has changed a lot too.
            In the beginning, he was scared. He seemed to believe that all Americans were easy, fun, easily bored and didn't know what love was. In a way, I had to prove a lot to him. Now were tasked with proving the same thing to his parents.

            In these times of moving to India to marry him and start a life, I have to abandon so much... It can be overwhelming and I go through a flux of identity crisis sometimes. Hang in there. It's never easy. Even when we are settled and married, some things will be emotional. The willingness to persevere is what counts. ♥

            In a way I feel like I do more sacrificing - but it's a trap! I can't think that way. He is going against his culture and society to be with me. He stood up to his parents for me.
            In Indian society, divorce is like nearly forbidden. So in his mind, he's taking a chance - trusting that I will always stay with him and work it out. And I will ♥ (I don't believe in divorce either.) People on the outside don't often see what he does and what he goes through, but I know and he knows. Don't give into your dark, exhausted thoughts. Everyone has them.
            From America to India. ♥

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