Moving Continents... Knowing What to Keep and When to Chuck!

[SmileyK]

And How to Get it There!

Ooookayyy, please bear with me while I ramble, as when I ramble, I ramble. So you don't need to read this unless you're extremely bored and like reading long ramblings. I'm thinking waaay ahead of myself right now - as usual! ;D There are currently no plans to yet close the distance for probably a few years, so maybe it's not a question to be asking right now, but it's been on my mind the last few days and my brain won't stop thinking! And LDRs are all about setting goals, needing a lot of preparation and having an end-plan, so I thought, why not?

I hope to be the one to move to Sweden eventually, which is good because there is no furniture or really big items that I need to take with me, and I'm willing to get rid of my computer and my monitor and everything and just take my hard drive - where as my SO not only has his computer but his two guitars and a keyboard and stuff, but as I'll hopefully be the one moving, then that's not really relevant. That leaves the little things that add up to a great many things. That said, it's probably a lot less than a lot of people would initially imagine because I am not a girly girl... I live off about 2 pairs of shoes, and I don't have a great lot of clothes - even then I'd be willing to chuck at least half. But I've always had this little idea in my head that when I move out of home I will treat myself to a new wardrobe because it's something I never do, I live off the same repeated clothes and am not one for liking all the latest fashions, making me a very picky clothes buyer hence my need to hang onto the small number of items I do have xD Which I think is no problem. But now we've been doing calculations comparing prices in countries and stuff and I'm getting the impression that clothes in Sweden are much more expensive and the thrift stores are less common. Don't know if anyone here has had that sort of experience... but of course, that leads me to wondering, "Well, maybe I should buy a few clothes here before I leave. Shop around the thrift stores because you can pick up good things for $10 or less. But that's more weight, more packing... eh, maybe I shouldn't." It's certainly something I'll hope to look into in my next visit - pricing and variance of clothes stores... soooo there's probably no need to think about this yet - but has anyone done the whole dump the clothes and buy new in the new country (and perhaps pay a bit more), or did you buy new in your home country because it was going to be less? Or, do you do eBay shopping? xD

But I think that's the least of my worries really. I'm not a girly girl, which instead makes me a nerdy girl One small shelf full of DVDs and a handful of PC games... some I'd be willing to sell/repurchase, but again, they're more expensive in Sweden, and some harder to get copies and I figure they're very lightweight. And same goes for books - small shelf full, would be willing to throw out out some and repurchase. 3 big photo albums - keep the photos and chuck the albums? But I do have a lot of heavy Harry Potter books I absolutely will not part with (some separate editions, some custom made ones and an expensive 3.5kg behind the scenes book in perfect condition). xD Speaking of HP, I do have a lot of additional things I have crafted, a lot of small light weight things which could easily pack down, some larger but still lightweight boxes (though I just had the thought of flatting them... I spent months collecting right-sized boxes and cardboard and would dread to do that again, but flattening solves that problem! xD) but I've also got a slightly heavy 50cm wooden trunk (but little things can easily pack into there for more storage spaces) and a heavy custom made 50x27cm frame (that's 12cm wide) - which when I think about it, these are probably my 2 largest and heaviest items, which isn't a lot (aside from the books, but books can be packed into tight spaces).

And so that just leaves all the sentimental things... namely childhood things I'm very partial to and have a great tendency to hang onto things. I have quite a number of soft toys an odd 2 or 3 dolls... and a few very small childhood things I've spent the last day or so reminiscing about. As kids, we kept all of our toys in very good condition, and I was absolutely obsessive over my toys. Not so much now, but I do have a number of favourite childhood toys that have been kept in the garage, and of my 3 other siblings, I was the only one to promise my Mum that I would one day take my toys back for my own kids, and my old school books - huge box full of them. Which I'm willing to pass up and just pick a favourite work book or two. But it's the toys... well kept 90s toys - the soft toys, a barbie or two (come on! they take up NO space xD) and a whole bunch of old Miss Party Surprise dolls which are a little bulkier, my old horse collection... I packed away my Saddle Club collection a few years ago, most of it surprisingly fitting into one heavy little box, heavy but little... it's just... ahhh!!! They bring back so many memories. xD And I've searched all of my old vintage stuff online, some of which would get me a bit of $$ but nothing dramatic though I'd still be willing to sell, a lot of the rest hasn't lessened dramatically in price, and would be hard to find elsewhere. Just a few things... just these dolls... and castles... which could be cheaper in the long run when we have kids. xD

But where do you draw the line? Because what at first suddenly seemed like just my HP collection and stuffed toys is now expanding to my own childhood things. And it's soo hard to imagine how many boxes/how heavy all of these things would amount to. It doesn't seem like a lot right now, but who knows? Because it all adds up. Depending on the size of the boxes, it could be 2 or it could be half a dozen. For those of you who have moved great distances - how did you do it? Pack as much into your suitcase as you could, and take excess luggage - a 2nd suitcase or air freight? Have two people travel with an extra suitcase each? Did you take the long and slow route of waiting for family to visit and getting them to bring additional things? Did you mail your stuff? It's very pricey to mail things from Australia, but I'd be willing to do it if it ended up cheaper than other ways... $440 to send a 20kg parcel via express air mail (difference between express and normal is very little difference, worth it to just pay express) or $207 via sea mail... but in both cases you're restricted to a 140cm girth (basically a small 35x35cm box, or whatever similar dimensions where the W + H x 2 = Girth). But 20kg... and when you think about the airline giving you a 30kg allowance... eh... Which leads to shipping via sea containers... and though I've been trying to look up about sharing shipping containers and what not, but that's time consuming and I really can't imagine my stuff taking up all that much, not enough to make it worth it and worry about sharing containers and filling crates and whatnot... I have no idea how much the shared shipping containers cost either as all the websites want to give you detailed written quotes which I don't have or need right now, but I imagine they'd be pricey with insurance and door to door delivery, more hassle etc... I mean, they're quotes are asking for apartments and households and I'm living with my Mum, basically all I have is in my 3x3m bedroom (which is packed with things...) So atm I'm sort of making an uneducated guess that postage (be it air or even sea mail instead of hiring out crates in the shipping containers) or air freight would be cheaper? Or a difference that was relatively low and might end up getting to me faster? I feel a lot could squeeze into suitcases, it's just the matter of weight and yeah... hard to say. The biggest concern would be the (quite little when you think about it) wooden trunk, and the frame, which wouldn't fit into suitcases... (and to clarify it's more of a decorative trunk, so it's not one I can just throw onto the baggage carousel. xD But maybe if it was in a box).

Like I said, sorry for the ramble Anyone else feel free to ramble along with me. Anyone else have major sentimental-don't-tear-apart-my-belongings issues? xD What are or were your moving concerns and how did you handle them? I'm willing to pay a bit of money if it means having most of my personal sentimental things that make me happy, but it's a matter of the most cost-effective way to go about it, and how much it would all cost before I said no. And it's doing my head in! I realise no one here can estimate the cost of shipping my belongings, but I just wonder what your experience has been with moving your own things (or your SO's)?

[Hollandia]

Sorry, I did not read whole thing but if you are years apart from closing the distance. You really can't even begin to think about it. At one point, I had a choice to bring my car or sell it in USA or sell it it here, and by the time this has happened, in a few weeks we close distance, I really had no choice.

I used to be able to think about what clothes and shoes and stuff I would bring, but again, really don't have as much say in that now.

I think you should not worry about that until you actually can make decisions today that will matter when it happens. If you have the ability to do so, then do it, if not, don't sweat it till it comes.

[differentcountries]

Wow, you are thinking far ahead But it can be fun sometimes. It is not so much a plan as a little mind game. What if? I sometimes like to play that when I am bored with the distance and the going back and forth all the time. What if I could actually stay put with him for lenghts at a time, or possably for ever? Or him coming here? How would we do it?

From my little experience with sort of having 2 homes: everything is heavier than you think! Cut down on any weight you can, because even a piece of paper weighs a little bit and it adds up weight quickly. Clothes and shoes you can wear in Sweden apart from sunny summer will probably weigh quite a bit. I imagine there are thrift shops, flea markets and bargin shops in Sweeden for cheep, neutral clothes (at least in every Norwegian city I lived in it was not hard to find several thrift shops), and of course you can buy nerdy wear online. Most of the clothes and shoes I keep in my flat with SO I bought in Turkey, that way I don't have to carry them on the plane and they are better suited to the climate there. I don't think you will save money on clothes as such by buying them in Autralia because you you will probably need the suitcase space for your other stuff. In time you can perhaps shop while in Autralia on visits.

I can understand you want to keep some of your childhood stuff. But it should not matter where it is, I mean if family can keep it you should be fine, or you can decide later what to keep where. I guess you will be visiting and vice verca (I don't know how often you imagine you will visit or they come to you, but surely it will have happened a couple of times before you have your own kids wanting to use it!). You are young, it is not unusual to keep some stuff with your parents anyway. I don't have some of my childhood toys, my parents have them in store for grandchildren. Granted, I will probably move close to my parents soon. But as a child I saw my grandparents usually only once a year and I still became attatched to the childhood toys of my dad and aunts. I don't know how you look upon closing the distance, especially internationally, but I picture slowing down but not stopping the international travelling.

I find as I get older I get less and less attached to my stuff. There is an old desk I love (it used to belong to my grandfather), it would be a little bit sad if I left it behind but I would be ok. My books I am very attached to, and of course personal stuff, but I learned from my visits to Turkey I don't have to have them around all the time. Books are also fairly easy to ship around, I mean they weigh a lot but they are not hard to fit in a box. Also, I plan to shift houses and then I want to throw away as much as possable before doing that. Do me that is very cleansing, even if we buy a bigger place it does not mean we have to put so much stuff in it. It is also part of the what if?-game. What if I would be the one to move to him? What if he moved here, there can't be too much stuff in the house otherwise his stuff won't have any space. Not that his stuff would be hard to move, I mean anything beyond some bags is with his mum's/the family house, it is not like he has to go get it soon. The trick is to have fun with the what if?-game without getting too attached to the outcome.

[SmileyK]

Hollandia - I know what you're saying. Who knows what could happen between then and now, right? Like at the moment I'm thinking... when I move out, it'll be to Sweden, hence I'll have no need to bring furntiure; I don't see the need to get a car between now and then, so best save my money for the move. But anything could happen in the year, or two or three or four between now and then, which could cause such factors to come into play, so I fully understand that. As for the clothes - I hang onto the same things for years so I can't see my wardrobe drastically changing between now and the move, however far away that may be, although I do hope to change it after the move in order to start a fresh with a new life and a new wardrobe! But they'll probably be gradual changes as well, so you're right. No put stressing over it. But it is fun to think "what if..."

differentcountries - I'd be ready to move tomorrow, if I could, so I guess in my mind's eye it's not that far away! But I'm sure, no doubt, reality will get in the way and delay my dreams. -.- I've heard the everything is heavier than you think, thing. And probably take up more space, too! (Though, likewise, there's always the "I was surprised at how much I could fit in..." xD Positive thinking?) But I guess with air freight and postage weight is definitely the more pressing factor rather than size and space. Can't I just wear like, every piece of clothing I have on the plane, which would leave my suitcase free for everything else? xD I will definitely look more into thrift stores and stuff too next time I'm over, and might get my SO to do the same. I think the main problem was that he's living in a small town, so not much around there, though we hope to live closer to one of the bigger towns, so I'm sure the thrift stores are hiding around there somewhere! Saw some listed in the main city of Stockholm last night when I was googling too, so somewhere to sniff out next time, although I'm still getting the impression that even their thrift stores will still be a little pricey, so will be interesting to compare to Australia. And that is definitely true about shopping on visits back home after the move. I wonder then, if in future visits before the move, it would be wise to just start transferring stuff over then? I know on my first visit I traveled with about 12kg less than the airline allowed you, allowing for lots of space for all the souvenirs I would bring home (which turned out to be not many xD). Every kg counts, right? xD

And the childhood stuff is also true, now I think about it. We won't be wanting kids right away, and I'm sure there'll be additional visits between then and the time we have kids (and after!), so I guess the toys could wait especially until they're at the age they would play with them - I just got the idea it was better to move everything in one go, but I guess that's not the case! Slow and steady... I do have many more toys and things my Mum would keep, I'm just talking about several small collections that meant a lot to me (as they would to any child!). I do feel bad though, because Mum would like to downsize houses when I move out and she still has a garage full of all my brother's old toys too, and they don't want their old stuff, it was just me and I always promised her I'd take my old stuff off her hands, and now I'm not! xD

On the contrary, my SO doesn't have a lot of stuff either - where as I have mostly things for shelf display, he has mostly furniture and instruments. As we're both young and pretty broke, we don't have a great deal of items that would take up space, I don't think! As the move is so great and vastly different, I imagine wherever we settle will be for a long time. It might be that I live over there for 6 or 12 months to ascertain that this is definitely what I want to do before I make the big move (which would be a wise consideration) then go home and yes, maybe I will have changed my mind on bringing some of my things by then... but all in all I can be quite of a hoarder and I dread to think about what would happen to my stuff otherwise!

[Dezface]

When I moved I brought all my RIGHT NOW items. That included clothes, accessories, makeup, etc. Then I brought a few sentimental items. All of my books and childhood things are at my dad's. I'm OK with it because while yes, I live here, I still consider that home too. I feel like I live in two places so it's only natural that I leave some things there. That being said, it wasn't a lot that I left behind. I didn't own much to begin with and was ready to "start new" any way.

As for the clothes-my plan is really to buy enough to get by here and purchase more things when I'm visitng back home. Like right now I probably won't buy anything else here until my next trip home. But I never completely redo my wardrobe. Just a few items at a time.