How different is it?

[rachel0106]

Lots of good advice here

The longest we've been together in one visit was 6 weeks staying in his apartment and although 6 weeks is not like living together, we worked out a routine that worked for us. We'd take turns buying groceries, and I'd do the cleaning and laundry during the day and he'd come home after work to cook - not a problem for us as I'm very used to cleaning and he loves cooking. I learned the importance of letting the little things go, and that a few $ here and there for little supplies wasn't a problem, and ultimately we both worked chores out to be as fair as possible.

[differentcountries]

I pay the rent, he pays electrical bills. We both pay for groceries and eating out etc, but I pay more. This used to bother him because he wants to be the man and treat me, but he pays his military loan and sends home money for upkeep of the family home and he doesn't earn that much. As for money, we actually discuss everything we buy. He is very frugal when it comes to every day items (I call it his hotel manager mode) and he thinks it is sexy if I manage to get cheap household supplies He doesn't mind if I buy stuff for myself, though. But if I like get a dress for 20 lira he is very impressed. So we sort of compete on being frugal - but then we don't mind paying a lot for top quality meat or fish. We also splurge on good whisky. I really like his attitude on money. He always wants to contribute. And also, sometimes my husband chips in to pay for food and other things (he payed half of the hotel bill when SO was in my country).

As for chores, my routine is usually I take the dishes and wash some clothes after breakfast. And I often tidy and clean the whole flat on the 2nd day. Then I go to his restaurant to study. We usually cook together, unless it is high season, then usually I cook. We often make dessert together but I bake cakes. When he has the energy, he does housework. He is very clean and tidy and loves to cook, it is just his job drains him in high season. I am a little bit more into cleaning than him, but not much more. He likes that I sometimes handwash and iron clothes, it is my housewife side

[wearethejays]

My boyfriend and I have been together since we were very young, and we had to be apart for 6 years without being able to visit each other because of US/Mexico border issues. But we closed the distance about a month ago, and I'm back with him in the US. Spending that much time in a LDR is quite challenging; we basically grew up together...but apart. So I was always worried that things would be different when we finally saw each other again. "We can spend hours on Skype but is it because that's the only thing we can do? What if we don't have anything to talk about when we're together? You can handle my bad moods right now, but what if you can't in person?" Etc etc etc!
And my boyfriend, always so sweet and comforting, said to me... "Relax. Stop worrying about these things. Anything can happen, but it is up to us to make things right. We love each other and that's what matters. I won't stop loving you; Just remember it's all about teamwork, because we're a team."

Anyways, things are very different. But that's not always so bad. Different is good. Sometimes he does things that are extremely annoying or I sometimes want to punch him with a kiss, and I bet he feels the same way sometimes (especially because I'm bipolar) but we try to understand each other, and why we do what we do.
We don't stay up all night talking on Skype like we used to because we don't need to anymore, and sometimes there's silence during the car ride. But silence is good. Just feeling his energy and his presence is more than enough.
Just don't forget who you are as a couple. We remind each other that because it's important, and we never forget where we came from, and how (and WHY) we started our relationship.
Basically, things are only as different as you want them to be. Where there's love, there's light.