I want to put it off fr a few months...

[Teakany]

Me and my SO dated 6 years ago. We broke up due to age difference and now that difference isn't as important. In 4 months I'm going up with my kids to see him for the first time in 3 years. He's never met my kids, and my son is autistic. I'm a little worried about how he's going to take them. he's convince it'll be fine. I'm no so sure. I'm worried he might be blindly biting off more then he can chew.

The plan is that when i come out, I stay for a week and then we all fly back together and he moves into a seperate place. But moving across country from his family and friends for something he might not be able to handle is scary.

I'd like to bring up him maybe staying back for a few extra months before flying out here himself. It would give him some time to reflect on the visit, not to mention save up a little more for the big move.

any suggestions on how to approuch the topic with him? I don't want to seem like i don't want him closer, I do! I just want to make sure he knows what he's getting into first.

[Moon]

I say go now, because wouldn't you rather find out sooner, instead of later, if he can't handle it? The longer you wait, the more your heart is involved, and the more it'll hurt if its too much for him. That being said...What if he CAN handle it, and does beautifully? Then you'll be losing out on months that could have been spent together. I'm sure you're scared, I would be, but you've got to face the issue head on and see if you really do have a future together or not. Good luck.

[Silviar]

Just bring up that you want to make sure he'll be emotionally and financially prepared, as it's a big step. Tell him that you want to do it the right way, even if it's a little slower, to give him the chance to fully prepare for it and all of the changes that go along with it. There's also a chance you could have a bit of an interim, like 1 month before he comes out instead. I suggest laying your cards on the table and asking him if he'd like a little buffer zone just to give him enough to prepare, and talk about it.