Hi, im new to all this

[Misspatience]

This is the first forum I've ever joined!
I've been in a LDR for a while now and I'm curious to get a sense of how other couples in the same situation are coping with the distance, also to vent, recieve and give advice.

[Unconditional]

Welcome to LFAD

[Honour]

Welcome

[merlinkitty]

You're in the right place for sure welcome

[Moon]

Welcome to LFAD. Whatever your situation, you'll find others here in the same boat

[Alicloud]

Hi, I am also a newbie to this world! Not too long in my LDR but finding it a struggle at times. Looking for ways to make it more bearable.

[mococatx]

Welcome to the forum. I'm a newbie, too, and I find that taking things one day at a time (or a few days) can really help. Especially when you are counting down to a visit! Makes the days pass a little more quickly.

[Alicloud]

Thankyou, that's good and wise advice. I tend to see the whole time out in front of me until I see him again and it looks and feels like a very long journey.... Currently I have a wait of four months and then he will visit for a month. Then another five and a half months until the next visit of a month.So many months! I don't want to wish my life away, but sometimes it seems as though I am living to see him. It's difficult to get on with my life when I really want to be sharing it with him. Oh... this feels like a moan and I'm not sure if this is the right thread to share! When I read about some LDR 's who get together even less than us, I feel very fortunate! : )

[mococatx]

Ive got a four month wait, too, before I visit him. I understand how you feel! I could sit around most of the day thinking of him, but I've got work to do! Lol. I'm thankful that there are times when each of us is simply too busy to chat and we focus on something besides staying in touch with each other. And in our case, we are limited in our communication choices. No video calls, but we text, email and I use Google Voice to call him in expensively so we can hear each other's voices. The other thing I try to focus on is what we are trying to accomplish while we are apart... What are we building towards? If our goal is to be together, what have I, or we, done to move towards that goal?
Anyway... Check out all the other areas and threads on the forum. There are plenty of other people who are doing this or who have done it and are now happily together!

[Alicloud]

Yes good to be distracted definitely! Lol...When I have a day off work or when my kids are with their dad, although I have lots to do, my mind wanders back to him again and wishful thinking. We have only recently started to use Skype to Skype, which has helped with the visuals. Its certainly opened up the communication as it began with fb messenger and continues to be the main way we chat.
We really want to be together, but have no clear plan as yet. The move would have to be him to me so the ball is on is court so to speak. I think not having a plan, as time goes on, becomes the issue for me, so I am trying very much to be in the moment and enjoy what we have now, however unconventional... and to get on with my life and see where it heads! I wonder if an LDR is a permanent way of having a relationship for some..without the pressure to close the distance?

[Moon]

Yes good to be distracted definitely! Lol...When I have a day off work or when my kids are with their dad, although I have lots to do, my mind wanders back to him again and wishful thinking. We have only recently started to use Skype to Skype, which has helped with the visuals. Its certainly opened up the communication as it began with fb messenger and continues to be the main way we chat.
We really want to be together, but have no clear plan as yet. The move would have to be him to me so the ball is on is court so to speak. I think not having a plan, as time goes on, becomes the issue for me, so I am trying very much to be in the moment and enjoy what we have now, however unconventional... and to get on with my life and see where it heads! I wonder if an LDR is a permanent way of having a relationship for some..without the pressure to close the distance?

Funny you should mention that...That's me My story is plastered everywhere on these forums, but the gist of it is pretty simple. I'm in the US, in a 6 year relationship with a Finnish guy. For me, moving just isn't in the cards in the foreseeable future, my daughter is here, my family is here, I have a career, bills, responsibilities. I don't speak Finnish, and never will fluently. Education is free in Finland, so most of the country is walking around with an advanced degree, whereas my education is a tech school. They're in the midst of a deep recession. So, even if it wasn't for my life in the US, I would never, ever be able to find work in Finland.

My guy is an only child of an elderly mother, he has an OK career there, oh, and he hates America and won't live here He's got a mortgage and his own set of responsibilities. All that means is yep, some of us do manage to do this permanently, without any pressure to do otherwise. I tell people I'd much rather have him 4200+ miles, and with a 7 hour time difference, than not at all It works for us, but we're somewhat unconventional and our situation is unusual and most people can't do it. Sometimes though, there's no other workable option and you learn to live with it.

[xjustxinxtimex]

Hey! I have not been here very long either but I am loving these forums already! So many people that genuinely want to help. I know I'd be a train wreck right now if I had never joined up here! I'm sure you will find what you are looking for! Good luck!