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New to this, would love advice!

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    New to this, would love advice!

    Hi everyone!
    Love what I have been seeing so far on here. I met my SO in October and he asked me on our first date in early January. We spent at most two nights apart until I graduated at the end of April. We were both sure we wanted to work at this relationship and try to make it work. In April, we said goodbye and expected to not see each other until September because we both have jobs in opposite ends of the country. Before I started mine we were able to meet for about 20 hours a month into the separation and have plans to meet a month after that. But the times in between are the worst. He's working in a very remote prt of the backwoods and rarely gets service. If he does, we try to speak on the phone but can usually on hear every other word for 5 minutes until the line disconnects. And as I heard from my SO on the phone the other day when the line cut back in... "I fucking hate this." I don't know what to do. I'm moving around a lot until I have an apartment so I can't receive letters, but send them every other day or so. It's just really hard cause he's with all of his best friends doing what he loves and I'm starting a new job in a city where I know no one. I just don't know what to do.

    #2
    Hi, welcome to LFAD

    Just like me you went from a shorter distance relationship to a longer one and I know the early part can be difficult, even harder if you struggle to get into a routine like you are. If you are unable to set up a regular routine of when you talk to one another, then I can only say to enjoy the moments when you do talk. I you can plan together a proper visit to see each other, then that will give you something to work towards and to count the days with increasing joy. I just want to make clear that when he said "I hate this" he was most likely talking about the connection (not openly reflecting on the relationship and the distance).

    In between those moments when you can talk to each other I would recommend you focus on yourself. As you're moving to a new city you should not only work, but find chances to make friends and be social. Also do any hobbies you like to do, especially those that might be more difficult to do if your SO was around due to time constraints.

    It's not easy being apart, but you can find ways to support each other, live your own life, and include them in some ways

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