Hello! Any help is appreciated

[Trying2017]

I'll try to keep it brief. I've been dating someone local for the past six months. It's been great, however, before we met, she had already planned a backpacking trip through South America that is going to last an indeterminate amount of months. We've agreed to stay in contact with hopes of reuniting when she returns.

The first few days weren't too bad. She was at a hostel with Wifi & we were able to text & skype. The last few days, however, she relocated and I can't reach her at all. Worse yet, I'm not sure when the next time we will have contact will be. Could be today, or could be weeks from now.

If you're familiar with attachment theory, I am a textbook Anxious-Preoccupied attachment style. Since being out of contact, my days are filled with constant anxiety, to the point that I can physically feel it. My heart literally skips every time my phone dings. It's really driving me crazy & I don't know how to handle it, especially not knowing when I'll hear from her again.

Anyone else out there with a similar situation, or awareness that you're the anxious type? Any ideas on how to deal with the anxiety?

[Sparkling72]

I understand... My SO is active duty military and currently deployed overseas, dangerous area... I knew his communication would be cut off unexpectedly at times for an unknown length of time. the first time it happened, I was caught off guard and very anxious. His last communication was "I'm going to go down and eat dinner, I'll message you when I'm done" and that was the last I'd heard for 2 weeks. Finally he called me, and put me at ease. Since that first time, his communication has been cut several times and I have dealt with it WAY better. Anxiety is normal to an extent and realizing you are this way is one step in the right direction. The best advice I can give is to turn your thoughts around... when you think of her, picture her living her dream and imagine how happy she is to be doing this adventure. Also, understand that she is missing you as much as you miss her. Think of a hobby you always wanted to take up, and do it. If it's some kind of crafting, then take some classes and make something for her as a surprise for when she returns. Pour your energy into something you love as well... that keeps the mind occupied. If you live and breath by your phone, you're only living for disappointment. I think it's safe to say she wouldn't want you in an unhealthy state of mind. Personally, I want a strong partner who understands that our love can survive anything, including silence while separated... and I knew that I had to be the same if I am to be in a military relationship, strong, patient and understanding.

[Trying2017]

Thank you Sparkling72 & God bless your SO for his service! I totally agree, I want her to know that I support her, distance and all. If only being aware of my anxiety & what causes it were enough to prevent, or lessen it! Thank you for the listening ear & taking time to reply.