Question for the Girls...No offense to the Guys.

[Leigh]

Do or did any of you ever date a "Mama's Boy" and it became a problem as in the family came first? How did you handle it?

[chef.rae]

At one point I did, at the beginning of the relationship i was ok with itbut towards the end everything started getting annoying to the point where his mother was calling me and screaming at me because i was taking her son away. That relationship not only ended really badly but did not last too long.

[garnet]

I married one. Yes it was a problem. The best solution was divorcing him.

I did not spend one holiday with my ex husband in our 11 years of marriage. He had to be with mommy. I was not welcome in the bitches house.

[Darth_Taco]

I'm a momma's boy :P. If you're not careful, this could turn into a 3-way relationship xD. It's usually not a problem though. Some guys are just close to their mothers, though some are disturbingly close XP. Once you see it start becoming a problem, it's time for a talk about boundaries. Remind him you want to date him, not him and his mother :P.

[dukes2011]

Hey Leigh! I'm currently dating a "mama's boy" as in family comes first and it definitely can be difficult sometimes. I have talked about it on my post "Family not understanding an LDR" a bit. His mother is very nice don't get me wrong, but she does have an issue with letting go. Luckily my boyfriend sees this and he is trying to help her see I'm not a terrible person, but it's frustrating for me sometimes. He has 2 younger brothers who are not in relationships, so I'm not sure if that makes it better or worse. Luckily she has never called me or gotten in my face about it, but that's probably because she's not a confrontational person.

[blankita719]

I feel like I am seeing my future here <3 I have a son who is a total momma's boy...and I am sure one day some girl will hate me because he always tells me he'll never spend time with a girlfriend if he can spend that time with me He is only 8 years old though, so I am sure that will change.

I have never dated one myself. Most of the guys I ever dated weren't very close to their mothers. But seeing as how I can picture myself being one of those moms in the future, here's how I would like it to be handled. Make friends with me. She'll be dating my little boy - even if he is all grown up. I've worked hard to raise him to be a good man, and I want some future girl to respect that and appreciate it. I'll stay out of that relationship if I see that he is actually being appreciated (or I'll do my best!). Family is important to me though, and I know it will be to my son too so any future girlfriend should want to be a part of the family, and the best way she can do that is by winning me over.

[efish1042]

My current SO had a lot of family obligations, but he isn't necessarily a Mama's boy. In fact, his mom gets on his last nerve. But he has had to give up time with me for his family before. I let him know how much I'm okay with and we tend to agree on what is acceptable and not. I understand that family is a big deal, it is for me too. Our families are just different. I can only recommend communication and compromise.

[amy&eden]

My boyfriend is a total mamas boy. Although she drives him insane most of the time she still comes first her happiness her everything comes before me and it does bother me im not going to lie. I ignored it at the beginning of the relationship but it ends up in arguments sometimes as there has been times where hes abandoned me halfway through a very important conversation where i really needed him and hes just said sorry i have to go mom needs me or mom wants me to do this or that. He was made move countries for his mother to be with her boyfriend and told me he had no choice in the matter....later on in the relationship i found out he could have stayed if he made it clear that he didnt want to go but he did not want to upset his mother by asking to stay with another family member for a while its safe to say it really upset me. He complains about how selfish she is for making him move and the expectations she has of him but then she always always comes before me not matter what even though im supposedly the most important thing in his life. Dont get me wrong she is a nice women just very nieve and holding onto the little boy he used to be and has messaged me several times blaming me in a nice way for distracting him from his exams when it actually has nothing to do with me......i love my boyfriend but if mama boys are old enough to be in a relationship then they should be old enough to not have mommy involved in everything. Its frustrating i know but the best advice i can give is do your best to cope and try to talk about it with him without sounding mean towards his mother...trust me been there done that didnt go well :/ good luck x

[floridaellen]

My SO is a family guy, not necessarily a Mama's boy but the family comes first. To make everything work out, I befriended his mom. She now considers me the daughter she never had.
It's weird for me because my family is not that close.

[Engel]

My SO adores his mother, luckly for all of us, me and her love each other! She is amazing, really! So yeah, if I didnt get along with his mother, I dont think there was any way this could have worked out. I think family is important as well, so a good son is going to be a good husband and a good father. I love he is such a good son to her, she raised him on her own, his father died when he was young, and now he can afford, he is giving her gifts when he can, like the iphone 4s and a macbook pro. I love how he is generous with her, and grateful, after all, if it wasnt for her, he wouldnt be the man he is right now! Oh, and me and her get along really well, and have loads in common personality wise. so he being a Mama´s boy isnt bad at all in my eyes, but i understand how it could be for some people.

I just cant stand girls that are a few weeks/few months with a guy and think she already has more rights than his mother.. i mean.. WTF? if a guy i was with for a small time went around mad at me for doing something for my family, and thinking he should come first, i would show him the way to the street. after a while he could get to the same level as my family (like my SO now is the same level as my mother, my grandma, and my brother, I love them all so really much, but it wasnt like this when we first got together, my family came first back them. after all relationships can end, but family is family. even though i dont talk with my father propperly, as we had some fights, if i was single and started a relationship now, my father would still come first.)


If a guy is a jerk to his mother, leaves her in second plan for a chick he barely knows, and isnt together with for long, I would never be with him. It means he can do worst with said chick in the future. After all, if he doesnt care about the woman that put him in this world, what makes you think he will care that much more about you? for long, anyway...

[Yaaamiii]

I just cant stand girls that are a few weeks/few months with a guy and think she already has more rights than his mother.. i mean.. WTF? if a guy i was with for a small time went around mad at me for doing something for my family, and thinking he should come first, i would show him the way to the street. after a while he could get to the same level as my family (like my SO now is the same level as my mother, my grandma, and my brother, I love them all so really much, but it wasnt like this when we first got together, my family came first back them. after all relationships can end, but family is family. even though i dont talk with my father propperly, as we had some fights, if i was single and started a relationship now, my father would still come first.)

If a guy is a jerk to his mother, leaves her in second plan for a chick he barely knows, and isnt together with for long, I would never be with him. It means he can do worst with said chick in the future. After all, if he doesnt care about the woman that put him in this world, what makes you think he will care that much more about you? for long, anyway...

Its like you took the words right out of my mouth =D. I feel that a guy who can respect his mother can respect his wife.

[Sora1101]

My SO is somewhat of a mamma's boy, he's told me that when ever he's stressed or has troubles he will always talk about them with his mom, he also feels like he needs her approval to move out before he does so which is getting to be worrisome for me because I am supposed to move in with him when I graduate and so far his mom thinks he isn't ready, which is somewhat true but honestly I need him to prepare himself whether his mom agrees or not, I need somewhere to go when I graduate or I'll be living on the streets. Although the recent plan is living about 5 minutes away from where his parents live, I hope she'll like me because I know that she'll probably be around quite frequently. The only advice I can give is to accept that your SO has a strong bond with his mother and if it becomes too unbearable sit him down and discuss your feelings with him.

[HollzHeartsChris]

First guy I ever dated was a total mommy's boy. It didn't work out well cause it only ended up with both my parents and I getting hurt and his mom and sister bitching about me and saying what a tart I was when in fact they were just being extremely hypocritical

[Jezah]

OMG, I dated one for 4 years and it was the WORST. It mainly was because she was a uptight super catholic bitch and couldn't stand me because I let her son live with me out of wedlock and wasn't religious. She made our lives hell, always trying to be in his ear about me and convince him to break up with me and move back home. The next guy I dated had a sick relationship with his mom, almost Oedipus like and she also hated me because again, religious whackjob (nothing against religious people, I believe in God, but some are nutso) and I didn't kiss her ass. I steer so clear of mommas boys now, HBB has a normal relationship with his mom but already she has made a few comments that put me on edge. I refuse to be a kiss ass, and what that one woman said about making friends with your SO's mom is all well and good if the woman is nice. If she expects you to grovel and be sickeningly sweet than count me out. I may seem harsh here, but I HATE Mommas boys not because of them but because of the 'momma'. Most I have met cannot grasp or cope with the fact that now I am the most importan woman in his life not her and so I get the backlash of he unhealthy clinginess.

[Rugger]

I'm super family-oriented. If you don't get my family's approval, sorry you are gone. When everyone else walked out, my family was there. Maybe I'm a "mamma's boy" in that respect, but I don't see a problem with that. I would never ever date someone who treated their mother like shit and I would never date someone who was all oedipal with their mother either. You do need a balance.

My SO is not a momma's boy, but he treats his mother very well. I adore both of his parents and they adore me. They know how much I love their son and only want what's best for him. His mother and I are close, We drink together and gossip, we go to see movies when my SO is at work and we go shopping. It's like being with my own mother. I gues I got lucky

---------- Post added at 06:10 AM ---------- Previous post was at 06:10 AM ----------

I'm super family-oriented. If you don't get my family's approval, sorry you are gone. When everyone else walked out, my family was there. Maybe I'm a "mamma's boy" in that respect, but I don't see a problem with that. I would never ever date someone who treated their mother like shit and I would never date someone who was all oedipal with their mother either. You do need a balance.

My SO is not a momma's boy, but he treats his mother very well. I adore both of his parents and they adore me. They know how much I love their son and only want what's best for him. His mother and I are close, We drink together and gossip, we go to see movies when my SO is at work and we go shopping. It's like being with my own mother. I gues I got lucky