Falling out of love?

[sagittariusgirl89]

FIRST OFF: PLEASE DONT REPLY IF YOU'RE GOING TO BE MEAN!!!!!

Ok, so Ive been doing the distance for 8months and Ive been with my BF for 1 year and 10 months. Lately, I've been feeling distant...i dont know what it is, but my BF doesnt feel the same way. Ive been short with my boyfriend sometimes and get annoyed easily. Last night, I was sad and he kept saying baby and I was being irritable when he was only trying to help.

There is this guy, never met him before, but we've been texting back and forth for a few days and we have talked on facebook a few times. My boyfriend knows about it because I dont wanna keep anything from him. To be clear, I dont want to be ina relationship witht his other guy or even meet him...I text him when my boyfriend isnt available or I text him when Im missing my boyfriend...guess its a bad coping skill. The thing is, I know I need to stop, but in a way I dont want to. I dont know...

Also, my boyfriend is coming Wednesday night and I have a speech Tuesday night at school...and Im so nervous! Im stressed over that too...

I dont know if Im falling out of love,,,but I want to be in love again! I want to feel like Im the luckiest woman on earth...

[folclor]

The only advice I can give you is to give yourself a little space. Let yourself become a little independent. First off: stop texting this other guy. It's putting a bandaid on a problem and it's a very, very poor bandaid. Even if you don't intend to become romantically involved with this other man you're beginning to form an emotional attachment to him that you don't need. Stop talking to him and find another way to cope. Go out with friends, read, play games, something that doesn't involve getting closer to another guy. Second: if you talk to your boyfriend every day, especially if y'all talk for hours, give yourself one night a week where you don't talk and you do other things. It will help with the quality of the conversation and it'll help you crave that time you get with him more. If you don't talk very much in a week, I'm not entirely sure what to do. Then again, you may just be in a weird mood. I know that when spring rolls around there's a smell in the air that makes me extremely lonely and when I get lonely I get clingy. Knowing this about myself helps me not text Alex 14 times a day when he's hanging out with his friends (I used to be worse than that, though). Maybe there's something (stress at school or work, a scent, a location) that is making you feel distant or lonely. try to figure out if that is the case and, if it is, keep a conscious note of that so that next time you don't feel as bad off.

There is a slight possibility that you are falling out of love with your boyfriend. You can't exactly control who you love and who you don't. But, search your own feelings and see what you come up with. if you're feeling like you need a break from the relationship give yourself that.

[ValadinShadow]

I don't know what to tell you. All I can ask is has it been a while since you have seen him? Because I know that I feel a little short and distant when I haven't seen my SO in a while. As for the texting friend...do you have someone else you can talk to or text when you feel down and your BF isn't available? I'm lucky and my best friend is that support for me. Having a support system is a good thing, but probably not some other guy you have never met...if nothing else you might be leading him on and not know about it. I hope you can work it out, and YAY for him coming Wednesday. Good luck with your speech.

[sagittariusgirl89]

Thanks guys. I know I shouldnt text that other guy, and I deleted his number from my phone. I see my boyfriend about every 2 weeks. Actually, I talked to my boyfriend today and I no longer feel like Im failling outta love with hiim. I think I was hiding the fact that I was texting this other guy, and I became guilty and took it out on my bf.

Also, Im stressed with school. Very nervous for my speech! and Im sad because my first speech my bf was at my house while i was at school so I felt calmer. But this speech he will be at work and I cant talk to him before or after...till 9

[Zephii]

I'm glad you've figured it out
Good luck with your speech!

[Semperfikindoflove]

I don't think you're falling out of love. Sometimes we need an outsider to put our relationships in perspective for us, it's the best medicine. I guess the one thing you have to consider is that it will take a toll on your relationship if you continue. Sometimes love fades while you are stressed out but you have to remember that all things will get better with time. I know it's hard to focus on the positive right now but you need to. Irritiability will harm your relationship more than help it. I recommend when you find yourself getting annoyed, just end the conversation and come back to it later. Part of having good communication and a good relationship is making sure that you take breaks to let yourself relax. When your heart rate picks up your adrenaline kicks in and nothing will get resolved, another thing I've learned through multiple relationship courses and psychology. Keep your head up and keep your heart from wandering.

[Mio]

Best wishes girl!