How has LFAD (and its members helped you and your LDR?

[Leigh]

It is a nice place to give/receive advice from others who have gone through or going through the same issues in their relationship.

[Bethypoo]

haha LuVSsw: glad I could help!! You have come so far since then are I have made a pretty good friend too!!

It is good to hear what you all think. As you can see, you never know how you can help someone or if you are helping them just by responding! Unbiased opinions are always good to smack us back in to reality and it is easier to take when it is coming from someone who understand what we are going though. Or maybe went thought it themselves.

Thanks to everyone for responding and I would love to read more of what others think!

[Ianthe]

It's been great to join a group of people who all share (or have shared) in the challenges that a LDR can have, and to have a place to go when my relationship is going through a rough patch...even if I don't ask for advice, it helps to know that I'm not the only one who has these troubles.

Also, I normally just lurk in other forums because I constantly see people who look for reasons to take other people's comments personally...but you all are normally SO friendly and open that it makes it easy to participate in conversations!

[Pixel]

I like being able to post how I'm feeling, good or bad, to people who understand exactly what I'm going through. Most of the people I know offline don't really understand the "long distance thing" and it can get really frustrating. It's also wonderful to see the success stories and good news, especially when the doubt and fear start to creep up on you. It's a great reminder that Hey! This CAN work!

[Moon]

The people in this forum genuinely want to help and support one another, that's an unusual quality on the anonymous world of the internet. When a new person joins, and tries to break the harmony LFAD has managed to achieve, they're quickly put in their place and it remains a nice place to be.

As for helping me personally, I lurked a lot at the old site, and saw how people were able to make LDR's work. On our first visit, Raine and I were talking about what we were getting ourselves into. He turned to me and said "But Jen, how can we possibly make this work?" I shrugged my shoulders, and told him "There are lots of other people in this situation, and if they can, why can't we?". That was all he needed, and now, a few years later, life is sweet I suppose a big part of it is knowing you aren't alone.

[Reuschel]

Knowing I'm not alone is the best feeling.

[blankita719]

I joined the site 3 months after we got together after I found the site by looking for quotes. I lurked for almost a month just trying to soak in the advice and seeing how others could actually sustain a long term LDR. My SO & I were looking at a minimum of 3 years LD, and at the 3 month mark, that was a pretty discouraging thought. Seeing couples close the distance, get married, have babies, and be successful is what I've needed. I've made some pretty great friendships (sadly most of them are no longer regular posters ) that spilled over into Facebook friendships, and there's a core group of people that I swear if we were all in the same place, our nights out would be epic! This site gave me hope that we really could work things through. We're past the half way mark and I can honestly say that if it weren't for this place, I don't know what I would have done, or who I would have been able to talk to about our relationship because no one understands unless you've been in one.

I've really gone back to more lurking but I'm working on more actively posting again when I find a situation where I can lend some advice Being just a little older that the vast majority leaves me out of the loop on many of the threads anymore!!

[sweetshay]

Helped me understand his point of view with certain things and im glad because people on here have made me understand what it feels like to be on his end of the whatever issue.

[dukes2011]

LFAD has been great for me to hear other people's stories and has helped me realize there is hope for that "happily ever after" ending. It's also helped me realize that I'm not alone and reminded me how powerful love can be. My boyfriend and I have been long distance on an off since we got together but it's been all LD since May 2011, so I had kind of forgotten about how resilient love is and how a true love can withstand a lot.

[bethyylovee]

The page of 100 Things To Do really helped us out. It's hard to be a LDR for so long as keep having fun new things to do. We always try to find something, but it gets hard. I loved the list and we've done a lot of new fun things that we really liked! And the forum has a page as well that we haven't even look at yet!

[Maid-in-England]

LFAD has really just help me to realize that I wasn't the only one simultaneously feeling the frustration, sadness and hopefulness of an LDR. It has kept me strong in my LDR and has really helped my SO and I to grow closer over the last several years... We are getting close to the 10 year mark and this site has been a big part of that.

I agree with this. Finding this site has been so wonderful, to know that others are in similiar situations, and that people have closed the distance, makes anything seem possible.

Congrats on 10 years, amazing.

[greensweatergirl]

I've found the forum has been very helpful in getting me to think through problems I have from a different angle. A while back I started a thread about my worries of being strung along by my current SO because stuff my ex had done. I still struggle with my feelings, but I found most people who replied had something useful to say that got me thinking in new directions, and there were a couple of people who understood exactly how I felt, which was really comforting. It's also been great for gleaning tips on how to make closing the distance easier. I have stuff lined up now that I think will make the move less stressful, stuff I probably wouldn't have done if I hadn't read other's threads. Not to mention the list of 100 things to do with your SO is really great. My SO got a total kick out of the telegram I sent him.

[sjaneec5]

It's a good place for me to vent without unloading everything onto my SO. I love the anonymity of it and that I can express my real feelings and get unbiased answers.

I agree with this! It's also nice to see that other people are going through the same things in their relationships as I am with my SO.