In need of advice.

[Joni]

For me, its hard to go hours without being in contact with my SO. But sometimes he makes up lies so we cant talk.I think sometimes he doesnt want to talk to me. Am i just paranoid? Or? Is anyone else experiencing this.....?

[Brieasaurus]

I think if you ask anyone, they'd rather sit and talk to their SO all day rather than not talk, so you're normal in that aspect haha. Are you certain that he's lied in order to avoid talking to you? If so, do you think that you may be smothering him a bit that he feels the need to do that? I know that it's easy to get caught up in the moment and just want to talk to him all day, but he does need his space, and so do you. It's just healthy. Maybe try setting a few hours of the day aside to give each other a break and see how that goes?

[Joni]

Yes sometimes i do think im smothering him but i just love him so much! and now i think that i should give him his space. Thank you so much!

[Bethypoo]

I am sure that you want to talk to him all of the time. I am the same way with Chris. However, we do have lives and need some time to do our own things.

Have you guys actually talked about how much you guys want/need to talk? Maybe there is a compromise that you can com up with so he has some space and you have the amount of contact that you need. I don't think wanting interaction and attention is to much to ask

[snow_girl]

I think based on your other thread about how talking to him so much is interfering with your day to day life you need to maybe step back from the amount you talk to him. I bet your SO has a life and needs to get things done once and a while, he can't be consistently talking to you and if you are making him feel guilty about not wanting to talk then that is probably why he feels it is necessary to lie to you. I think you need to find a hobby or go out with some friends, you need to seriously balance out this relationship or it is headed for disaster.

[Biddlybiddlybombop]

Me and my SO have had to set a rule: If one or the other of us has had a long day, and doesn't want to talk, we have to be honest about it. It's not that we don't love each other and want to spend time together, but sometimes you just need that time for you. A quick "Hey, I'm a bit tired today, will talk tomorrow, I love you", is ok.
I have to be honest, I struggle to accept that he wants quiet time. But it'd be worse if he lied to me or just didn't talk to me all day because he'd be afraid that I'd be mad at him because he wants some "me-time".
You're not alone. I'd love to sit and just be connected to my SO all day. But it's not a sustainable lifestyle.

[sweetshay]

If he is making up lies not to talk to you then you have a right to be paranoid. I hate not knowing what my SO is doing and if I ever found out that we was lying to me about what he was doing I would not tolerate it, id be pretty livid. Maybe you should try to talk to him and ask if he needs more space from you and how you can figure out what will make you both happy, sometimes poking at the issue pushes them away further but it's not fair to be ignored. You deserve to know what's going on.

[Joni]

Yes i talked to my SO last night and we made a deal to have about 7 hours of space from each other (mostly because of school). Hopefully that will make our relationship better and im trying so hard to let him have his space every day. but thank you everyone for your advice.(:

[bethyylovee]

This is the way I see it, sometimes you just don't really want to talk. Sometimes we're just in the mood to be by ourselves, or maybe with our friends. And I think maybe sometimes our SO's might make up a lie to avoid hurting the other one's feelings. Not all the time, but it's just something I've noticed people do sometimes. Stephen and I are on a completely open basis. If I want to talk, and he doesn't, he just tells me. That way I know he wants alone time, or friend/family time and I can go do something else.