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    Pain after a visit

    So I just came back from the airport to see my boyfriend off. He's back to Spain now. I really hate to have to say goodbye everytime and it really does not get easier.
    After coming back home from the airport I feel so 'empty' and it really blows having to count days all over again!

    What do you do to make yourself feel better after saying goodbye?

    #2
    Ah *hug*

    I hate the part where you can still count back.. "24 hours ago he was still here", "a week ago, i woke up next to him" etc... I feel for you!

    Try to look at the positive! How much fun did you have! And how happy you are with him! And do you have plans for closing the distance?
    \\ Someday everything will all make perfect sense. So for now, laugh at the confusion, smile through the tears, and keep reminding yourself that everything //
    \\ happens for a reason //

    \\ We don't stop playing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop playing //

    \\ When I was 5 years old, my mom always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down “happy.” //
    \\They told me I didn’t understand the assignment, I told them they didn’t understand life!! //

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      #3
      try keeping yourself busy! For the first few days maybe take care of all those chores you have neglected while your SO was there, I find that cleaning up helps me clear my mind when I'm very upset
      If you feel really lonely, call a friend to come over and have some girltime, do manicures and pedicures, facials etc.
      Once you feel really pretty go out and have fun, night out with the girls, going to the movies, out for dinner with friends...don't dwell on how empty your life is without your SO, instead find how much fun you can have even without him.
      If you feel like being alone for a bit, do something productive instead of just sitting there waiting for your SO.
      Use the time to write a letter to him, paint/draw/craft something for him or maybe make a mixtape
      And most of all, talk to your SO knowing he is there for you no matter the distance will help and when you talk, (aside from everything else you want to talk about) talk about how much fun you had together, plan your next visit and things you can do then! Having a date set always helps
      And well, the nights are always hardest, but if he left a jumper or something that smells like him, you can try and fall asleep on that..in case that's not an option, how about a big pillow to fill the space?
      You can listen to your favourite happy (!!!) songs to fall asleep or maybe a new audiobook to listen to -there are plenty on youtube

      I know this is hard and the goodbyes never get any easier, but all of the above always helps me a lot get through the days Just focus on what you have at home rather than what you don't

      *big hugs*

      Comment


        #4
        Well yes, I will probably be going to spain for an internship in july, and Im planning on staying there for 8 months, but nothing is set in stone yet. After that I have two more years of clinical internships left here in the netherlands. My boyfriend wants to go stay here during those two years and work. However he picked up on biochemical studies recently and I dont want him to throw all that away even though he already has a degree in nursing.

        However I'm pretty sure I will end up being with him for the rest of my life and I dont want to keep on having to say goodbye everytime as we've done so for the past 4 years now! Luckily I've already booked a ticket to Spain so I can start counting days again!

        ---------- Post added at 06:55 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:51 PM ----------

        Originally posted by maja View Post
        try keeping yourself busy! For the first few days maybe take care of all those chores you have neglected while your SO was there, I find that cleaning up helps me clear my mind when I'm very upset
        If you feel really lonely, call a friend to come over and have some girltime, do manicures and pedicures, facials etc.
        Once you feel really pretty go out and have fun, night out with the girls, going to the movies, out for dinner with friends...don't dwell on how empty your life is without your SO, instead find how much fun you can have even without him.
        If you feel like being alone for a bit, do something productive instead of just sitting there waiting for your SO.
        Use the time to write a letter to him, paint/draw/craft something for him or maybe make a mixtape
        And most of all, talk to your SO knowing he is there for you no matter the distance will help and when you talk, (aside from everything else you want to talk about) talk about how much fun you had together, plan your next visit and things you can do then! Having a date set always helps
        And well, the nights are always hardest, but if he left a jumper or something that smells like him, you can try and fall asleep on that..in case that's not an option, how about a big pillow to fill the space?
        You can listen to your favourite happy (!!!) songs to fall asleep or maybe a new audiobook to listen to -there are plenty on youtube

        I know this is hard and the goodbyes never get any easier, but all of the above always helps me a lot get through the days Just focus on what you have at home rather than what you don't

        *big hugs*

        Haha maybe I should get one of those huge pregnancy pillows!
        Luckily this time I will be going to Spain very soon, in fact, in three weeks already! But after that I dont know when I will be able to go visit him as im pretty busy with uni work. Thanks for the tips! Its always good to get advice from people going through the same thing!

        Comment


          #5
          Aww, I know how you feel - we all do! Manoek and maja gave some very good advice I'd just like to add that my SO and I start hypothetically planning our next visit as soon as possible; even though it's far to early to make concrete plans, being able to at least daydream together never fails to make the situation seem much brighter. I hope you've been feeling better since you last posted *hug*

          Comment


            #6
            I just happen to have the same problem. I got back from airport 2 hours ago and it was the worst goodbye I have ever had to say. Our last night went good until 12.30 Midnight, when he suddenly go so sick we didn't even sleep. WE had a 2 hour drive to airport and neither me or him felt good. We were 10 times more cranky than it should be. Apparently besides the DISTANCE problem ( like it's not ENOUGH!!!!! ) me and my SO got some food poisoning, him worse than me. So imagine the 2 hour drive, I was so worried if he could concentrate on driving at all, stopping every 30 minutes because he felt sick, I felt sick. I felt nervous and sad. He felt nervous. Then sad. Guys, it was such torture...... And when we had to say goodbye at the Security he barely could look at me ( from this freaking sickness) so we didn't even know what's going on ......are we sick,are we sad,are we depressed and oh yes, we are apart again.

            I can't even begin to tell you how awful I feel. He wrote me a text that he is in bed with some temperature, went to sleep and will call me when he is awake, not to wake him up. But I am so worried....... I don't want to wake him but I need to know how is he ..... what the ..... should I do know! I HATE THIS DISTANCE! Not that I was expecting a HAPPY goodbye, but this was so much worse than the usual heartbreak - it's heartbreak + worries + .... some kind of uncomfortable ending. It sucks. Now waiting for a skype call and so many days to go.......

            I'm sorry abut the negativity but I just don't know how to handle myself now,after a goodbye like this.

            Comment

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