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    Thinking of doing something drastic

    Well, ok, not horrible drastic, but a bit forward I guess. Since he's been so indefinite about a meeting and because he seems to not like to plan things in advance, I was just thinking of sending him a plane ticket to kinda force the issue. Think that's too forward after two years or just enough or what?

    #2
    I think it could end up being a waste of money if he has shown no interest in meeting. I would instead tell him that if he isn't interested in meeting after two years then you are not interested in being in a relationship

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      #3
      Generally, I think if people DON'T want to meet... it's not a good sign. After two years, he should be equally desperate to see you as you are him. Outright ask him why he doesn't want to meet.
      Ultimately, I think snow_girl is right. Two years... wow. If he's really not up for meeting, you should move on. Not ever meeting is not a good basis for a relationship.

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        #4
        Yeah I'd have to say that it doesn't really sound like a good idea. If after two year he doesn't want to make plans...well I think that says something. I think you need to have a serious talk with him and he needs to figure out what he wants and what he's willing to give, because relationships are give and take. There is no reason for you to buy his plane ticket for him. If he wanted to come, he would pay for it himself or you guys could work something out together. I mean, I don't know the situation in depth, so I can't really say, but it doesn't sound like he's being very fair to you, and you shouldn't have to put up with that.

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          #5
          It's a little fishy that he doesn't want to meet. Even if he is scared, after two years if you have the opportunity you take it. I know I was scared, I also was dreading my parents having to know, and my mom coming, but there was no way I would miss seeing him. I think you need t sit and talk and see if he really wants to pursue your guys relationship. That if he does a meeting has to happen at some point.
          I love you Nathan <3
          sigpic
          5/25/09 <3

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            #6
            Originally posted by snow_girl View Post
            I think it could end up being a waste of money if he has shown no interest in meeting. I would instead tell him that if he isn't interested in meeting after two years then you are not interested in being in a relationship
            This. 2 years together & not meeting.. there's something off about it. Hope everything goes well!

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              #7
              Has he made it clear as to why he doesnt want to meet? I obviously have no clue about your relationship, but I myself would be be questioning why he has been unable to meet for two years!
              Bring it up with him though, and suggest that you would pay for tickets (maybe he has no money, but is too proud to admit it, even to you) but don't send them without talking it over first, as the others have said it is likely to end up badly

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                #8
                I agree with what others have said, you really need to confront him with this. After two years he should at least want to see you! If it's not possible due to circumstances that's another story, but not wanting to meet is not a good sign.

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                  #9
                  I agree with all the above posters, speak to him before spending all that cash

                  "A thousand miles seems pretty far, but they got planes and trains and cars, I'd walk to you if I had no other way"

                  First visit 23/08/2012 - 05/09/2012
                  Second visit scheduled May 2013
                  Ended relationship August 2013

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                    #10
                    Frankly, if it were me, and it had been a year and we had the funds/opportunity to meet but he was still reluctant, I wouldn't waste my time any longer. The entire point of being in an LDR is to close the distance. For online couples, the first goal is to MEET as soon as possible to see whether the connection you share carries over to in person. If he doesn't want to do that then what's the point? Don't waste your money. It has to be something both of you really want.

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                      #11
                      I'm going to disagree with all the above posters. Sometimes I think people just need that extra push, I would have loved it if someone gave me a plane ticket in the four + freaking years it took Obi and I to meet.
                      However I think you you have the money to do this, perhaps you should just go to him.
                      Happily married to the little Canadian boy I never thought I'd meet in person

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